Possibility???

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2009
Possibility???
5
Fri, 11-20-2009 - 6:31pm

I believe my 9 yo SS is ADHD. And it seems like his behavior has gotten worse over the past year (not sure if it's this or because his real mother popped back into the picture at the same time, or a combo of both).


Either way here are some of his behaviors:


-Inability to sit still -fidgeting all the time, in the car at the table. He will get up 5 + times to go do something, sometimes a simple hug to his father who is in the kitchen. It takes him about an hour to eat because he's usually on the floor rolling around. He never sits squarely on the seat, he's always hanging halfway off. Both his father and I have tried to correct him, everyday.


-He interrupts. I know this is common with chidlren, but after 5 years of correcting him, I would think that he would learn. We have done the ignoring attitude, the talk afterwards, and ashamed to say, the yelling for interrupting.


-When my husband and I are talking, he will also burst out with an answer that he has no idea what he is talking about. Just 10 minutes ago my husband asked me what time we went to bed last night. Before I could answer SS blurts "4AM!". We are like what are you talking about... he says I don't know.


-He rushes through homework. This has been his biggest pitfall in school. His teacher, DH and I all tell him to slow down. And because he rushes he makes careless mistakes. He tells us that he just wants to get it over with. We then tell him that he has to do it over again because of the mistakes.


-He is unable to be specific or has an eye for detail.


-He will stop homework for some reason that he is either not asked about or part of. He seems to have his mind wondering instead of focusing on his work, for example.


-We will give him directions on something and he is unable to follow them (BIG ONE!)


He just seems very all over the place. It's hard to deal with him sometimes because I feel that after 5 years of consistency and it hasn't done anything, what could be the problem. I will tell him something and 5 seconds (no joke) he forgets or doesn't remember being told that.


Does this sound like ADHD?


He has also gotten into trouble at school, not by his teachers but by fighting. This past week he was expelled from class for brandishing a weapon (I KNOW, we are freakin' out!). So we have a therapist lined up for the 30th. I was thinking of bringing this up.


He has expressed to me that he wants his mother to spend more time with him, and we have relayed that message to her (2nd time actually). This second time seems to be doing the trick, but I'm not sure if it's because of him being in trouble and now seeing a therapist, or if it's because court is in 2 weeks and she's trying to butter up the judge.


Please help! Thanks!!!

 
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-10-2007
Fri, 11-20-2009 - 7:03pm

Hi, and welcome!


it could be ADHD, but it could also be any number of other things. The only way to know for sure is to have a Neuropsycological evaluation. I would ask his Dr for a referral to one in your area, to get he process started. Keep in ind it can take weeks, and many appointments to get a true diagnosis.


Have you tried breaking tasks into small parts, for example, Get your socks, Now put on your shoes, get your shirt, now put it on the hanger etc. Same with homework, do 10 problems, then walk around for a bit or have a snack. Making sure he has plenty of busy outside activities, basically let him move and wear him out.


Is he also showing signs at school, other than fighting? If he isn't then it is likely not ADHD.


A child may HAVE ADHD, but it is not what they ARE. Never tell a child they ARE ADHD.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Fri, 11-20-2009 - 10:44pm

Sounds like an eval would help; a first step might be to talk to his teacher about whether she thinks that makes sense. But yeah...you know, the ADHD meds have a side-effect of reducing appetite, but for MY kid, back at age 7 when he started taking the meds, he ate MORE because suddenly he could sit down for longer (weirdly, not an issue at school, but big for dinner-time).

It's ADHD, there's *always* other things it could be, that's the point of getting a real evaluation!

Megan
Megan
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2009
Fri, 11-20-2009 - 11:48pm

Have you tried breaking tasks into small parts, for example, Get your socks, Now put on your shoes, get your shirt, now put it on the hanger etc. Same with homework, do 10 problems, then walk around for a bit or have a snack. Making sure he has plenty of busy outside activities, basically let him move and wear him out.>>>


We do break down the tasks, because after reminding him numerous times, it got annoying. So now we do break it down and he sits there and acts like he is listening and then like I said, 5 seconds, yeah seconds, he's already forgotten.


 
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2009
Fri, 11-20-2009 - 11:51pm

Sounds like an eval would help; a first step might be to talk to his teacher about whether she thinks that makes sense.>>>


When have talked to his teacher... he now no longer has one because he's expelled and won't be going back to that school; he's been stuck on independent study. We never mentioned ADHD because it didn't pop into my head until last night, but like I told the other poster is her biggest notice was him rushing and having careless mistakes and after been given numerous attempts he still gets them wrong because he wants to be the first one done... he wants to get the work done and do what he wants.

 
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2007
Tue, 11-24-2009 - 5:59pm
Several years ago, before I was in his life, my stepson had a severe violence problem. At that time, he was diagnosed with ADHD. From talking about it with him I'm still not sure the violence was associated with the ADHD as much as pent up anger. There were problems with his biomom. He was put on a low sugar diet which everyone says helped. Again, I'm not sure this was really related to the ADHD. He says he felt less angry while on the diet. As he matured he has had much less problem with uncontrollable anger and at this time I'm very proud of his ability to not get into a fight. He still has a lot of problems though.