Starting the process, but skeptical

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-22-2007
Starting the process, but skeptical
Mon, 11-02-2009 - 4:56pm

My DD is 7. She has always been an extremely social and clever creature! She's always talking to people and always buzzing with enthusiasm.

In preschool and kindergarten the reports were, N. needs to learn when not to socialize. This was not news to us. We figured she was going to have this behavior to deal with. It was fine because really, she's a pretty easy kid to parent. She's fun and clever, smart and witty...but I do have to repeat requests like brushing teeth and getting dressed. She does get sidetracked at times. But how much of that is just being a kid???

So this year, she's in 1st grade. The first two weeks were HORRIBLE! She got in trouble for spitting a puddle on the floor one day, and a few days later dumped her water bottle on another student's head. I was mortified! Sure, she can be social...but she has always been respectful too.

SO...through talks with her teacher I kept hearing her say things like she sees N. having poor impulse control....she can't seem to control her body...she trips or bumps into her friends a lot...she gets overly stimulated by her peers, but can focus when pulled away from the group.

I asked her if she thought she saw some ADD/ADHD type behaviors. and she said "If it were my child, I'd probably have her evaluated. So we started the process. We sent in the questionnaires from the Pediatrician and we have our first meeting with the doc next week.

I have to say, I wasn't surprised by her scores on the questions. She scored N. Off the charts on a several items. My DH and I don't see those kinds of behaviors at home.

I guess I'm skeptical about her being ADD/ADHD. I know it's possible...I can see a few things that would point to it. But I certainly don't see what the teacher sees. I'm trying really hard to like the teacher...but I'm not sure I do. I feel like she may be singling my daughter out because she doesn't fit into the "good student" mold. My daughter is very bright and has a superior memory. I'm wondering if she's just bored...or has anxiety issues.

I guess I'm just not sure what to think. I'm feeling a bit alone and confused. DH and I both agreed...if we hadn't gotten reports from school like we have been getting we probably wouldn't be getting her tested. Is that wrong? Am I doing this just to appease the teacher? What are some things that we should bring/ask the pediatrician (BTW...LOVE her..she's the best doc ever and has a child with ADHD so I feel confident she will help steer us in the right direction.

Any ideas/help/support you can give would be greatly appreciated.

BTW...she is pretty healthy but does have a peanut allergy...I've read some connections with food allergies and ADD is that right?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-10-2007
Mon, 11-02-2009 - 5:15pm

Hi, and welcome.

I know all about being skeptical, and I would ask some questions first. Do you see these behaviors at home? In church, or the grocery store? ADHD has to be seen in more than one setting and for at least 6 months to meet the criteria for the DSM-IV.

If my childs teacher thought my DD had ADHD I would definetely evaluate. Sometimes teachers are our best resource. I would NOT have her evaluated by a Pediatrician, no matter how much I loved her. I DO love our Ped BTW, but she isn't a Neuropsychologist, and should not be diagnosing ADHD. Peds are GREAT for coughs and illnesses, but not brain disorders.

A child may HAVE ADHD, but it is not what they ARE. Never tell a child they ARE ADHD.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Tue, 11-03-2009 - 11:11am

One thing you might consider is having her KG teacher *also* fill out the forms?

I will say, there are things that show up FAR more at school for us, because we simply either don't have the environment or don't require that sort of thing at home. We don't DO fast transitions, or make sudden changes, because those throw (OK, threw at age 7) my kid. We don't have all those classmates around to have fun with, etc., etc.

The first suggestion is, of course, because that way, you'd have another teacher's input in the diagnosis. And, in truth and honestly, I should say, in all the forms I've filled out, I never track perfectly with teachers...heck, I don't track perfectly with my spouse!