At what age does aggression & hyperactivity typically go away?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2008
At what age does aggression & hyperactivity typically go away?
6
Wed, 12-22-2010 - 12:46pm

I know that the doctor said the hyperactive/aggressive component of ADHD will get better as our son gets older, with lack of focus remaining. What I'm not clear about is what "older" means. Can anyone share what they've heard of experienced as far as when this component improves? Our son is seven and I'm just waiting for any sign of this getting better. In the hour before his meds kick in, he is out of control. The medication makes him functional during the day (so much so you'd not know he has ADHD), but when it's not active, things are rough.

This morning, I put him in time out in his room (locking him in, per the therapist's advice, since he's dangerous) and he got a hold of a drill set (not sure why this was in his room ... it was his but not usually in there) and drilled a hole in his already damaged door. I honestly couldn't hear that's what was going on because he always throws things at and damages the door, so it was just usual loud. In the past, he's punched holes in the door (starting at age three ... yep, that out of control) and slammed toys into it enough to damage it. We keep patching the door, but at some point the whole thing needs to be replaced. For now, he has to pay for the repairs and possibly a new door with any Christmas money and by extra chores around the house.

I just want to hear there's hope this out of control component will go away in years that aren't too far off. Please tell me there's hope. :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2007

Ok - Lolo was grad. H.S. when I met you - 'k.

Denise

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-02-2004
Actually, I know one kid, who has gotten behavioral help, in the form of therapy. It has taken a while, but he is slowly maturing and using the techniques (walking away, not hitting, not using hurtful words.) His dad is 40, and by all accounts, he was exactly the same as a kid, only he didn't get therapy. He still throws tantrums and will blame others, make threats when he doesn't get his way and will try to exit moving vehicles before they can stop because he is angry. The son, at 11 acts more mature. But the mom has acknowledged that there are issues, and has gotten help. The dad, according to family, has no issues, but works for his brother's towing business and lives in a camper at the towing yard. He is not reliable as a worker, but brother "takes care" of him. The son is going to lead a very different life than his father because he has gotten help. (No medications yet.)

Long story short, I think it all depends on acknowledging the condition and getting appropriate help - and medication while helpful only addresses some of the symptoms. And some things (leg jiggling) can just slide because they really are not harmful to anyone. To me, when I am troubled by something and the doctor says "they will grow out of it" means that I need to do more research and maybe find a new doctor. ADHD kids may be a bit behind socially, but waiting to get help usually is not good (because we parents do deny that things are not right anyhow, whether is it learning to talk or control their emotions.)
Avatar for sabrtooth
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-1999

OMG, Denise!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2008

Thanks so much for the feedback. It's good to hear this will get better and I appreciate the encouragement.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2007

Someone very wise told me when my son was 14 - which is when I came to Ivilliage - that "boys" with ADHD and co-morbids do get mature at 25 ..........depending on the severity of ADHD.

Denise

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-19-2008
I don't think it actually ever goes away, I do think they learn to control it better. The Agression is more controllable as a Kid gets older, but I know Adults with ADHD who are Hyper, very hyper. Some learn to control both, some never do.

Have you considered a 24 hour med? That may help.