Where should I start

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2003
Where should I start
5
Wed, 05-06-2009 - 10:35pm

Hi. I'll try to make this brief. My son has always lacked attention & exhibited hyper behavior. I've been reluctant to jump to ADHD until now b/c he was young. (he's currently almost 7). We'd also have periods where it seemed like he was growing out of the behaviors, but would backslide.

The behaviors are getting worse in that he does not like to be disciplined. He throws tantrums HUGE tantrums. He throws them at home but b/c I can direct him one on one more I can usually head them off- unless he's really agitated from being punished over school issues. However, at school he doesn't focus & follow directions well so he gets in time outs which can lead to melt downs. The last straw, he was suspended for 2 days b/c he threw a purse at the student teacher for putting him in time out. He also HATES going to school most days.

I was desperate & immediately asked the teacher to ask the counselor what steps I needed to take to get him evaluated. She recommended a psychologist. He's a certified Art Therapist. We've had one session. He came out & told me ds was agitated, doesn't like to be controlled & he's got to get over it. If he gets into trouble at school, he has to be in trouble at home too. I know it was only the first session, but I was like "gee whiz, I'm glad I just paid $100 for you to tell me everything I ALREADY know." We have another appoint. for next Thursday.

Yesterday was a particularly bad day for him & after waiting in the lobby with him it really dawned on me that it is easier for his 2.5 year old brother to sit still and listen than it is for him sometimes. I looked online at "symptoms of ADHD" & he pretty much has EVERY one of them. I'm wondering if I should stop the Art Therapist & go see and neuropsychologist instead. Should I keep them both up? What all would the neuropsychologist do besides testing- is there therapy involved too. Should I give the original psychologist longer b/4 I try something else.

Pumpkin

&nbs

Avatar for sabrtooth
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-1999
Wed, 05-06-2009 - 11:18pm
I'm sorry, <> He's a WHAT? A certified Art Therapist???
PLEASE take your child to a qualified pediatric PSYCHIATRIST or ped NEUROLOGIST. Either of these are MD's, which is what you need. No psychologist. Of any kind. They CANNOT diagnose a MEDICAL condition which may be in the mix, such as thyroid disorder or Crone's disease. They CANNOT prescribe medications, which along with counseling, are essential for a good outcome. Always start with the MOST qualified. You can always step DOWN in quality for follow-up.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-10-2007
Thu, 05-07-2009 - 9:17am

Hi, and welcome!


I would reccomend a Neuropsychologist, or a Neurologist. Both can order blood work, and do an evaluation, and also rule out other issues.


My DD has had evals with both, and a Neuropsych tend to be a bit more thorough in my opinion. If he does in fact have ADHD, or another issue you might also need a Psychiatrist if you choose meds and they are needed.

A child may HAVE ADHD, but it is not what they ARE. Never tell a child they ARE ADHD.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Thu, 05-07-2009 - 9:57am

A psych who's experienced in working with ADHD kids can help a lot, but FIRST, you need to get a proper diagnosis.

"Got to get over it"--if that's literally what he said--would have me not going back. Especially if he's ADHD, the point is to HELP him get over it. And *any* idiot with *any* experience in the field ought to know that positive discipline generally works 1000x better than negative with this kind of kid, so the "punish at home" would hardly be the only thing you ought to be doing. I mean, this idea is only in all the books about ADHD, about Aspies, or even parenting in general... (and I'm not saying YOU should know this, but any child psych ought to!!!).

Poor kid, and poor you--do, please, go get a proper diagnosis, who knows if it's ADHD or one of the related issues, but I doubt it's just misbehavior from what you've been saying--you don't sound like the type to simply let 'em run completely wild.

Megan
Megan
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2003
Thu, 05-07-2009 - 10:59pm

Thank you for responding.

I didn't know if I was just expecting to much out of one session. Yes, he came out and told me that he would just have to get over not liking to be controlled and that most kids outgrow it. He said if he gets in trouble at school, he has to be in trouble at home to. Send him to his room, no TV, etc. Way to state the obvious. Problem is, when he is in one of his moods, he will not stay in his room & I asked how do you make him stay & he never even gave me an answer. Just kept saying "yeah, just keep him in his room, no TV."

Honestly, we don't do a whole lot of timeouts at home. I usually take away privileges which maybe makes it harder for him to take timeouts at school. So maybe that's my fault. I just find that he works harder to get his privileges back than to avoid "timeout". He had another meltdown today. In PE he wasn't following directions & the teacher wanted him to "jump on the wall" as punishment & he wouldn't do it, so she wrote him up, which led to a huge tantrum. This time they kept him there b/c he made the statement that he wanted to go home. *sigh* The Asst. Principal already gives me the feeling that he doesn't think I discipline at home.

I guess I'll be calling the neroupsych tomorrow & cancel with the other guy & I'll get him an appointment with the pedi to rule out other things Thanks.

Pumpkin

&nbs

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2004
Fri, 05-08-2009 - 2:21pm
Let us know what you find out! All I can add is that if you get a
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