can we ever be satisfied? how do u deal
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| Fri, 04-27-2007 - 8:22pm |
So, truth is I'm ready to get out of IEPs and schools and I'm thinking about just doing it God's way. I was successful in helping other families get plans and their dream ieps for five years. We have NOTHING! Still! So, even though I have a crapy iep with speech therapy 20mins a week (yeah really what do you do in "group" therapy for 20 mins a week?), my spec ed director WROTE MY DD'S PLAN and it isn't illegal and I can't get a good one and so, I'm really thinking I need to stick to my guns and quit. I promised myself that if I had to go all the way to court I would quit first. It isn't worth it. Even if I get my heart's desire on her IEP I can't force anyone to provide the services or if they do to do it right or good. Since the school doesn't want to there isn't a point right? I have no support and no help and I just can't do it anymore.
I'm thinking about just letting God take over and just enjoy my dd and not worry about trying to have the best iep.
So, when as parents should we settle? Ever? At some point we have to accept right? Is it dependent on how severe the dx is?
Thoughts everyone?

I have not been in the place that you are now, and I have learned that it is very hard to know how one will react in a given situation until one is in it.
My gut is to say that I would take the matter to court and fight it -simply on principal, but I know that is way easier said than done, and it can take years.
Or I might move to a better school district.
visit my blog at www.onesickmother.com
Take a deep breath..............
Let's step back and look at what (if any) goals your child has met. If goals are not met, then looking to see HOW they can get there. Nothing happens overnight, as much as we wish, but goal and milestones do emerge.
Go over the pro/cons of her IEP
No school is gonna be perfect. Your child has a fighting chance. Mom's get SO overwhelmed and it's hard not to get lost in all this.
School is almost over for this year. Take a mini break and re-assess what your child needs and what direction you would like to see happening.
I was over my head when I first got dx'ed and wanted to get all the help I could find for my ds. He was so overwhelmed himself, it started to backfire on me. So I taylored it for him. Now I feel his little brain needs more, so I am adding more to his schedule.
It's all trial and error on the schools part and parents part.
Don't give up. Taking a mini break is one thing, but the fight is never over. She's the same child you gave birth to, she needs a little more than most.
((hugs))
Nora
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Jess~
Along the same lines as what Paula was saying, I'm not sure I fully understand what you're trying to achieve or what input you're hoping to get from the rest of us. When posting a message like this, it's important to proof your post from the perspective of the reader who doesn't know what's going on inside of your head as you type. I'm sure your post made perfect sense to you, but to the rest of us...well, let's just say, "not so much."
To answer what I think was your question (based on the title of the post)- can we ever be satisfied? Yes. Several of the parents on this board are extremely satisfied. Those who aren't, keep fighting. Some are willing to go to court. Some aren't. Some prefer homeschooling their children. Some choose to move to an area with better services. It's a personal choice. But rarely does anybody actually "throw in the towel". Giving up on our children, just because we're not "getting our way with the school" is never an option. I have no idea what you mean by "God's way"...but the comment is rather suspect to me.
In your post regarding IDEA 2004, you referred to having moved a couple of times because of your DH's residency. Is your DH a doctor? If so, I find it hard to believe that he's not able to help you find the support you say you're lacking. My husband is a physical therapist and several times we've used his contacts for assistance with such matters. Even though we're very satisfied with our current services, we're choosing to relocate because we can see what the future holds in this school district, and we want more for our two spectrum kiddos.
I know you're fairly new to this board, but evidently you're not new to your daughter's diagnosis. Please forgive my being blunt, but your posts, so far, have been very emotional. Which is understandable...we've all been through the emotional ups and downs. However, since you've been at this for a while, I would hope that you'd have come to realize that letting your emotions get the best of you is of no service to you or your daughter.
In the end, I think you need to keep things in perspective. Yes, fighting schools is a pain in the butt, and no...no school is perfect. But an Autism Spectrum Disorder is not a death sentence. If you're truly going to "do it God's way" then perhaps you should consider being thankful for what you do have. There will always be somebody worse off than you.
Amy