Can't be in denial anymore

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2005
Can't be in denial anymore
11
Tue, 10-31-2006 - 6:45am

So, ds #2 (3.5)

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-19-2005
Tue, 10-31-2006 - 8:01am

Dee, I am just sending you some hugs and letting you know I am thinking of you.

I only have one, so I have not BTDT, but I can imagine how hard it must be. I know others here have been in your position. But you are such a great mom, whatever comes down the line you can deal with it. Plus, maybe the dx will be easier this time. You know more about what to do and also you are in a new state now, so maybe it will be better.

Hugs to you too. Gosh, everyone here seems to be having such a hard time right now. I think we all need a collective group hug too!

Katherine

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2003
Tue, 10-31-2006 - 8:26am

Dee,


If it helps: I found it much easier the second time around. My second kid was much more HF, too (and DH thought I was off me trolly entirely!). The SD was more willing to listen to me because I had been proved correct in the past, and I was just a lot more sure in my own convictions, moe knowledgeable of the system and more willing and able to stand my ground.


And as you know, they earlier Cian can get therapy, like OT and social skills, if needed; the better the likely outcome.


(((((((((hugs)))))))))


I know that feeling of walking off the cliff for the second time, but you have a parachute.


-Paula


-Paula

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 10-31-2006 - 9:05am

Ya know, when I read the topic I was entirely expecting some silly very autie type story about Liam.

Big hugs from the been there more than once crowd. If there is any advice I would give it would be that you are doing great by giving up the denial already. Mike was so different from Cait and so much more socially outgoing that we refused to accept he was on the spectrum for years. It was a very stupid mistake. So you are on the right path already.

If it helps any, Dave had TONS of spectrum type behavior at that age similar to what you mention only he had way nasty tantrums as well. Lining was definitely his friend. Still can tend to have symptoms, but he has great perspective skills and I really think with all the intervention and early work we missed the bullet on time #3. He did have a PDD-NOS dx for a while there but I really don't think it fits anymore. ADHD and SID definitely does but he is gifted and spirited too.

Renee

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Registered: 09-09-2005
Tue, 10-31-2006 - 12:13pm

Oh well if you want a silly autie Liam story, I have tons from the week with my Mum;) lol!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-26-2005
Tue, 10-31-2006 - 12:14pm
Dee,
I am totally at the same place you are now. Ella(2.5) is being evaluated for speech right now for the very same reason(trouble answering questions). She dosen't use echoalia but is very repeatative in speech almost script like. I have had her in E.I since she was 6 weeks old for another issue and then she has continued with OT since then for major sensory stuff. Jake had already been disgnosed by her age but he was much more obvious handflapping,obsessions,echoing speech,poor eye contact and he is considered HF. Many of those things have resolved and he seems more AS so I can completely related to thinking if he's HFA what the hell is she. The way Renee described Dave reminds me more of Ella major sensory stuff(which can affect speech) and some anxiety related to her tactile defensiveness. Does Cian have sensory issues? I don't know how it is in your house but Ella adores Jake and imitates him a lot so it's hard to tell what behaviour is hers and what's his. Anyhow, just wanted to let you know I understand what you are going through.
Teresa
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2003
Tue, 10-31-2006 - 1:10pm

(((((Dee)))))

Amy

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Tue, 10-31-2006 - 10:51pm

oh ((((Dee))))


This has got to be especially draining during the last trimester of pregnancy!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2005
Wed, 11-01-2006 - 12:04pm

Thanks all,


I think it hit dh worse than me; he is exhausted all the time now and I can tell he's getting sick from worrying too much; also still trying to dump the house in MD before the bank wants it's mortgage in Jan...sigh)


I am still waiting for EI to call me back about getting the OT eval; might have to don the Mommy armour again and go remind them not to trifle with a heavily pg, hormonal Irish Mammy!!!!! Lol


Dee

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 11-01-2006 - 7:33pm

(((HUGS)))

I want to say it gets easier, but I'm not sure it does. I don't have more than one w/ an ASD Dx, but I do have more than one w/ issues and special needs. I do have more than one w/ an IEP and another child probably going that way. I think my skin has gotten thicker. I think my tear tanks fill up faster. I think my brain has been stretched w/ all the stuff I know about developemental delays and learning differences I really didn't want to know. I can't say this is what I expected when I became a parent, but it's not such a bad life.

Betsy

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 11-01-2006 - 10:08pm

"I can't say this is what I expected when I became a parent, but it's not such a bad life."

Well said.

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