Crisis update
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| Sat, 07-22-2006 - 5:59am |
School cannot keep him. Physical escalation is out of control, they feel. And yes, there has been more than one incident, but it does seem to me to be related to the drug therapy AND this school has not been able to really get through to him on a consistent basis, although they have tried very hard! But we still have awhile to get the drug levels therapeutic and he manages for a long period of time, and then WHOMP!! Although the escalation does also seem episodic and it is just so hard to tell what is going on, because his difficulties are not consistent enough! So we will keep him at school 2 more weeks. Then literally I am not sure what we will do.
Very likely we will keep him home and homeschool awhile until we get his drug therapy under control. He could go back to ASD school probably, but I am NOT sure that is the right thing to do. We might need to get these behaviors under control before considering THAT even. Well, I mean, I might want to. He hates school right now. Of course he doesn't hate it when he is being successful, but this last few months, hell, year at both schools, has not been good for his love of learning... And his therapist is away in France for 6 weeks as of today, BAAAD timing, dammit! We can reach her by phone and email, and will.
BUT the school also recommended several day treatment programs to help him with his splinter social and behavioral skills and dealing with his temper while still working on the drug levels, because they will also have a clinical component. Because of course we have never had Malcolm out of control before, we don't know anything about these programs and I am willing to consider them. We need to set up appts. and start doing research, lots of people to talk to, etc.
The only really good news is that dh is always brilliant in a crisis (although dreadful at the day-to-day slogging) and so he is calling people, making appts., bringing me chocolate, playing with Malcolm HARD and making him laugh, making me laugh, back in HIS body and pithy and insightful, LOVE this man in a crisis. Not that I am happy we are having one...
more as we go,
Sara
ilovemalcolm

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Ok, putting on my very bestest stern face (teehee) to agree with you that malcolm shouldn't have taken a piece of the poptart but inside I am saying GO MALCOLM!!!! Ya know, if he is like Mike he probably had those girls pegged from the get go. It is so unfortunate that he had to have such behavior turmoil in the process though. Funny, lots of ASD kids I know are possibly the best barometers on people particularly adults. Mike is like this. If he takes to someone (which is rare) I know it must be a very special person. He is beginning to accept more in that group but Mike basically divides people into 3 groups; I really like you, I will tolerate you and don't even step foot in my universe. Sounds like those girls are group 3.
I am really sorry for how badly you are feeling. YOu have every right to be very angry. I can tell you though that I know from what you have said about Malcolm that he is one awesome dude and very soon this is just going to be a bad distant memory and a learning experience.
I know you want to end him on a positive note at that school but if he is really stressed or having a hard time next week I would just pull him. Both Cait and Mike continued to escalate at thier old schools and classrooms when they had less than stellar placements no matter how much we tried to work things to get them to finish out the year or what not. They knew it was uncomfortable and not right and the total look of relief they left was amazing. I kind of think of it like perhaps a job I really hated. You finished it out but more than a sense of accomplishment I was just relieved to be DONE!
Enjoy your 3 weeks away. It will be really great for all of you.
Renee
Dear Renee,
Well, the summer class is studying acting and theatre, which Malcolm enjoys. And I will come to the class to give more acting classes, also his "Aunt Christine" who is a storyteller and actress, will visit. We are arranging for his class to actually attend one of her storytelling shows out in Central Park.
We will see, however, how the 2 weeks go. Dh and I are prepared to pull him if we can't coast him happily through the 2 weeks. I think we can do it, but we will be watching with eagle-y eyes.
Malcolm also is a great people barometer. I have lots of funny stories about that. There was an OT he didn't like one year, although he did manage to tolerate her and eventually participate. She was describing early on in year all the ways he was resisting working with her and all the things she was trying, very full of herself, this girl, and finally she asked me, based on her descriptions, if I thought I knew what these resistances meant, was he stressed in his life, etc. "Sure" I said. "I know exactly why. He doesn't like you."
Sara
Sara,
I think you are doing absolutely the right thing.
visit my blog at www.onesickmother.com
(((HUGS))) and prayers for the right thing to come up and for something to end the crisis! glad your DH is great underpressure!
Betsy
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