Dangerous Stimming
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| Tue, 06-13-2006 - 6:30pm |
My 11yo HFA is normally a very good kid. She's the one that minds the rules, never atcs up, etc. But she's got his thing about running and handflapping at the same time. Her flapping isn't localized to the hands, it's a whole body thing, he head bobbles around, her body twists, the whole gambit. It doesn't bother us, except when she's running or walking and doing it at the same time because she can't see where she's going and she ends up stepping all over the place in many different directions.
Now, everytime she does it while going through our living room my heart skips a beat because she bumps into things and has tripped several times. I keep having flashes that she might trip and smack her face on the side of the TV or something and really get hurt.
Well, today someone DID get hurt, but it wsn't her. She went barreling through the living room flaping away spinning all over the place and ended up kicking her 6yo sister in the chin, who was laying on the floor to watch TV. Now, the 6yo was making sure to stay well out of the walkway, so the 11yo had to go waaaaaay off course to do that.
I've tried talking to her about it, and pointing out how it's dangerous to not look where you're going so many times I'm gonna turn blue! We've tried docking her allowance for it, making her do push-ups. giving rewards for going an entire day without doing it, etc. But nothing works. After she kicked her sister, and we got the blood cleaned up (perfect set of teeth prints on both sides of the 6yo's tongue!) she said she felt sorry for her sister but she didn't didn't see how it was her fault. She just doesn't get it!
Any suggestions? We've been trying to get her to stop this combo for seven years.
~SG-1Niner


Grrr.
I just wrote up a huge reply and the IV gremlins ate it.
That is at least the THIRD post I have lost since starting to use theis ID, and at least the second to you.
Anyhoo; as I was saying:
You seem to have tried all the standard methods and inputs, and I was
visit my blog at www.onesickmother.com
Paula,
Of course the IV gremlins don't like me. I can't imagine they would like anyone who sicked their agent on them for breech of copyrights.
Anyhoo, no, the jingle thing wouldn't work, but only because this kid LIKES jingles. We actually have done her hair up (recently) in dozens of mini braids and put tinklies on the ends, and yes, she likes the heavier ones. That reminds me, she's certainly one to complain about my fantasy book characters! The tinkly braids thing was because she wanted to BE "Lynn Mythogan, Pirate Princess and acolyte to the goddess Nightmare". LOL
Well, she is grounded for the rest of the day, has lost electronics, can't go outside, no phone, etc. She is allowed to finish school projects, draw, and chores. That's it. AND she tried to get out of doing her Home Ec project by claiming that the sewing machine is an 'electronic'. ~Snicker~ Pretty inventive. But she deflated when I pointed out that the machine will still work even when unplugged by simply roatating the knob. So she was then faced with a choice between arguing about it and having to finish her project manually or put a sock in it and get to use the 'powered' option. LOL, she decided that maybe the sewing machine wasn't REALLY an electronic after all! And her pillow sham came pretty good too.
The 6yo is okay, though her mouth still hurts and she is having problems eating anything with salt in/on it (found that out when she tried a few a potato chips and ended up screaming from the whole salt in the wounds thing). She digs the fact that she gets lots of popsilces to keep the swelling down though! LOL. Ran out of her homemade sugar free pops and had to fill an icecube tray up with orange juice.
~SG-1Niner
Is it a thing that comes out of the blue once in a while or does she go in spurts of doing this. As in she will start and continue for a while one day or just do it once in a while?
I had 2 thoughts. One was not very feng shui unfortunately. But basically was to make her environment less conducive to doing it. Putting things in her way. This would work better if it came in spurts and you could make a few adjustments to the area to disuade her from doing it. A stubbed toe would be no fun and she couldn't work of the velocity in a short area but it would be a real bear to live like that.
The other idea was to have a zone where it is allowed and only allowed in that place. A section of the backyard, a place in her room. Arrange it into a stim safe zone and then if she feels the need it is only allowed in that space. If not, punishments ensue.
It sounds like she has a definite sensory need or something she is seeking and obviously the need to do it is off setting any possible consequence so giving her an more appropriate place may help.
Other than that I would say try to replace the behavior by meeting the need with something else but I think you said you have already tried that. That would be a REALLY tough behavior to replace.
Renee
This is something she does as a reaction. Or rather, she flaps as a reaction and sometimes happens to be walking or running while she dose it. There is no way to make a 'safe zone' for the combination. That would be quite litterally like making a safe zone where you or I could walk and smile at the same time. And that's what her flapping is: smiling. It's how she smiles, how she laughs, how she expresses happiness and joy. She flaps every single day, usually many, many times a day. It's not the flapping that's the problem, nor the running or walking, it's the combination of the two.
I had a long talk with her tonight about why it's dangerous, and what we could do about it. We agreed to do two things. First, she's going to increase her Vision Therapy to include perpheral trainig. One of the things she mentioned was that she couldn't see something (or someone) until she was looking directly at them. Her Opthomologist said she has basically no peripheral vision... but he also said there was nothing that could be done about it. BUT, DH has said he notices that when she's standing still she sees and reacts to things that are supposedly outside of her range of vision. I need to find a new dr cause the last one she saw was an idiot, didn't believe in any form of vision therapy at all (despite the fact that basic patching on a regular basis took her completely out of glasses!).
Second, we talked about enforcing the practice of coming to a full and complete stop when she feels the needs to flap. It hurts to come to that idea because I know darned well that it's the same as asling me to come to a full and complete stop anytime I feel the need to smile or laugh. Heck, I don't even think about doing it in most situations because it's a simple natural reaction. She thought it was a good idea though, so we'll try it.
I think I need to up her brushing therapy too. It's such a simple thing to do and she's so much less wiggly when she gets it every day. We kinda let it slack off to just when she feels like she needs it. Maybe it's time to reinstate it to her morning routine.
DH also said that he thinks her stimming has increased over the last month and he thinks it's due to her allergy meds. She only takes them surring this time of year (pollin allergies) and I was already thinking of making some rosemarry oil for her so she wouldn't have to take the meds. Actually, it would be for both of us since she gets those allergies from me, lol. My mom used to make it for me when I was growing up and it worked like a charm. Unfortunately, it's not something sold in stores, not even Sprouts (I checked).
~SIGH~ it just seems so overwhelming, but somethings gotta be done before someone gets hurt REALLY bad. Still taking suggestions.
I'm sorry I didn't have any advice for you. It sounds like you have made a good plan so I'm wishing you lots of luck with it. I was hoping you could tell me more about the rosemary oil. Ds & I are having a hard time with allergies this yr. I tried him on claratin for the first time yesterday and it didn't do anyting for him or me for that matter. I usally take allegra but I'm out and the price is killing me (no insurance). So I'm interested in how you make the oil and what you do with it. Thanks
Samantha
HI Samantha,
Rosemarry is one of the best natural treatments for pollin allergies, but only if you're not allergic to rosemarry (one of my cousins is, so he's kinda SOL). It doesn't have to be oil, you can eat it to get the same (if not better) affect. Things like stuffing made with fresh rosemarry, pasta with rosemarry olive oil sprinkled on it, etc. It also works great in dinner biscuits.
BUT, since one can only eat so much rosemarry before getting sick of it there are other ways to administer it. I supposed the easiest way is to just drop a sprig of fresh rosemarry into a small pot of water and bring it to a simmer,letting the aroma therapy spread in the room. If your kitchen is a large room (like mine then stand close to it for about 5 minutes. My mom also used to put it in my bath water by doing it the same way as the aroma therapy but pouring the water into the bath (remove sprig first).
To make oil you take ten good sized sprigs and blanch them (dip in boiling water then dip quickly in ice water) strip the leaves off and put them in a spice blender (Braun Handmixer works fine) with 1/2 cup of rose tea oil (any unscented potpouri oil will work) and blend REALLY well. Put in a air tight container (I use old spice jars) and store in fridge.
you can use the oil by adding it to liquid potpourri burners or adding a tbls to the bath. You can also make it with olive or canola oil and use it as a quick food additive for soups and such. If using olive oil you don't need to refridgerate (olive oil is a dandy natural preserviative). In fact, for a long term project you can take a corked bottle an stuff it full of rosemarry then fill it with olive oil, recork it and let it sit on your counter for almost as long as you want. Doing it that way it will take 3 months before its ready to be used, but you can cheat by heating the oil up to a low simmer (oil is moving in pot) before pouring it in.... let it cool off before recorking it. Done that way it becomes usable flavored oil in 5-7 days (shorter time for hotter climates).
Basically it's just making sure to get the herb at least once a day durring allergy season, whether it's by injesting or aroma therapy. BUt injesting works best. and never use dried rosemarry, it's the natural oils in it that do the trick.