DH rant...NOT pretty
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DH rant...NOT pretty
| Tue, 06-26-2007 - 12:06pm |
So you all know dh has been in a little funk lately and I figured it was what has been going on and stuff.
| Tue, 06-26-2007 - 12:06pm |
So you all know dh has been in a little funk lately and I figured it was what has been going on and stuff.
Dear Christine,
But there is nothing illegal paying off debt, now, is there? And you can and will survive an audit!!! Do you have any good legal advice?
I, as a working actor for many years, got audited 2xs. In those days, they really really picked on actors and other struggling free-lanced artists... Yup, twice, and the years I got audited for were pretty pathetic in terms of the amount of money I made. The first time, I did go a friend's tax attorney for advice, who looked over my entire taxes and basically gave me strategies to deal with the IRS. Many deductions are subjective depending on the auditor you get, but if they disallow anything there are ways to disagree and then fight back.
Anyways, both times I didn't owe anything, but I was a pack of nerves.
I am sorry that you are angry with him, and yes, it was pretty sneaky not to tell you while he was stewing all that time. But it sounds like he was so upset that he had to process his own feelings before talking about this, and that would be JUST LIKE MY DH, TOO. Ugh.
Anyways, more ((((((HUGS)))))) This will work out.
Sara
Mom to Erin (19) and Haley (10yo Asp
I am not so upset about the whole audit thing, s**t happens. I am just so upset that he kept it from me because in his words, he didnt want me to get another migraine or anxious. To me, that is so lame. With all the stuff I deal with Nick, work and everything else, keeping this from me compounded it all! Now I am even more stressed because 3 1/3 weeks has gone by and we are now pressed for time to get this taken care of. When we got married it was for better or worse, well this is as crappy as it gets and to keep it from me, when we could have really lost alot was stupid. I know the IRS can really come after you, they can put a lien on your house, freeze your bank accounts, and who knows what else. This is a legit audit so we are stuck, no dancing our way out of this one, but here I am thinking he is just stressed about Nick. I feel like I cant trust him right now, will there be any other surprises? I hate that. He should know I could probably eat nails and be fine, the IRS stresses me out, but I am not a china doll that couldnt handle it, I could probably handle it better than he could, I have a child with Aspergers! This feels good to vent :)
Christine
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Christine
Dear Christine,
This sounds like a few things my dh has done in the past...not to the extreme of hiding an IRS notice, but similar. I understand your frustration and feeling of betrayal. But I found as time went on (and I'm sure a lot of you will agree with this) that men's brains aren't wired like ours. They don't think in the same aspect we do. My dh forgets EVERYTHING! And when I ask him why he forgets such important things, he gets upset and says "I just do!". I have found that men's priorities are different than ours. Example: women remember to buy a friend or family member a birthday card; men are lucky to remember their OWN birthdays! I got the impression by reading your post that maybe he wasn't TRYING to betray your trust or undermind you....but just wanted to try and deal with it on his own (like a man never asking for directions no matter how lost you get!)and when it backfired, the only thing he could come up with to cover up his "incompetence" was the excuse he gave you. Mind you, I could be wrong, but maybe when things calm down a little, you could look at it and see if maybe that's it...his MALE EGO..in a nutshell! Has he ever done anything like this before? If not, likelyhood is that he just screwed up and was covering his own egotistical male arse!;)
Lots of love and hugs to you hon....everything is gonna be fine!:)
Jen