dissapearing kid.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2007
dissapearing kid.
6
Sat, 07-14-2007 - 11:03am

Does anyone else here have a problem with your pdd child taking off? (danny is 8) It happens just about every day. I feel like I need to take his picture every morning so I can remember what he is wearing. That way when I go out looking for him I'll know when I spot him. Or maybe I should just dress him in hunter orange every day. I don't know. It's just frustrating. He is stuck on "wanting to go see his friends". It's getting to where I have to keep him right by my side every minute of the day. And he hates that. He expecially hates it when I assign one of his older siblings to keep an eye on him.

Last week he wanted to play with a boy down the street. So I said o.k. And I went over the rules with him on how if Garrett couldn't play or wasn't home, to come straight home again. and how he was to just be at Garrett's house and not go anywhere else. So about an hour later I sent my older boy to go over and check on Danny. He wasn't there. He had been there for about 45 minutes and then he left. After searching for an hour we found him 4 blocks away going into someone's back yard...we don't even know these people. He said he was looking for his friends.

There have been times I have had the mailman keeping an eye out for him. I have called the sherriff a few times when we just couldn't find him. Any suggestions? Wanda.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2007
Sun, 07-15-2007 - 12:48am

(((Wanda!!)))

Oh hon! That would scare the crap outta me too! How do you still have your sanity honey? Anyway, this was a suggestion to me from a retired police officer. He had dealt with a person whose child kept wandering off. Talk to your local Child protection services dept. about a ankle bracelet monitoring system. He said that these people told CPS about their child and CPS hooked them up with this device so they could monitor where the kid was at all times from their computer! If your local CPS doesn't have anything, talk to your local police or state police. I don't know where you live, but a lot of states are adopting tracking systems for alzheimer's patients and persons with autism. I know you might be concerned about his possible embarrassment at wearing an ankle monitor or something, but think of the alternative! Possibly losing your child...or him feeling a little embarrassed for a while...gee..I think I would just let the embarrassment twindle away while I enjoy having my kid with me! ALIVE AND WELL!! Good luck with this...I know how you feel to an extent. My ds is 5 and has PDD-NOS and he has been known to climb out windows and go out doors while we are sleeping! So we put alarms on the windows and doors!

Jen

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-2006
Sun, 07-15-2007 - 2:05am

I agree with Jen (Hey jen, how are you doing?). I remember useing the "LEASH" with my boys when they were little. Heck I got looks from strangers but I didn't care. I cared more about my boys then their stupid ideas on how it looked.

I remeber my boys running off and having to go look for them (even my dd who is now 20), and it was a nightmare. Now they are much much better with it (because of rules, they are very rule orientated) and now its okay, just cuz they have to do things the same way.

I sure hope things get better for you.

Lainie

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-11-2007
Sun, 07-15-2007 - 5:53pm

Wanda,

I understand how you feel. Caden has started wandering off more and more. There are a lot of previledges that my other children have, such as going to a friend's house, that I can't give Caden. I just can't trust him to go and stay at one place. I do allow him to go down to my mother's down the street, but he still has a tendency to "get loss" on the way there or back.

Cristi

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 07-15-2007 - 8:11pm

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2003
Sun, 07-15-2007 - 11:34pm

I have a dissapearing kid too. I had a scary incident not too long ago and posted here. I am considering getting either this monitor that a child can wear on their shoe at www.mypreciouskid.com that goes to 150 ft. Or one from http://www.ion-kids.com/product.html that goes to 350 ft outdoors. That one is worn on the wrist. We have an event coming up so I had better hurry and make up my mind!

Molly

Molly
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-12-2005
Mon, 07-16-2007 - 9:28am

Ah, yes, the ever illusive Bolter. We have one of those here too, our 7yo AS DD, Eva. We have to keep extremely close tabs on her at all times.


We have lots of kids on our street and she's on good terms with most of them. Despite constant reminders that if she goes to see one person and they aren't home/available to play she isn't to go to another person's house without checking in, she still does. The other week she even snuck out after sundown without telling anyone to go play at the park. She was missing for 2 hours and had the whole neighborhood out looking for her! And, of course, she didn't understand why we were so upset. She's still grounded.


Thankfully, we have a really good neighborhood in regards to helping out with our kids. Everyone knows that 2 of our younger kids (we have 6) are on the spectrum and need as many extra pairs of eyes as possible keeping tabs on them. It's gotten to the point where if they, especially the younger one, shows up at anyone's house the parent present asks "Does your mom know your here? No? Call..." and hands them the phone. The parent used to call, but it became apparent that Eva was having problems memorising our home phone number we switched it up to make her call so she'd get the constant practice.


Our older ASD DD, Jade, isn't a bolter, just very very pretty and daft. She's a steriotypical pediofile target. She's also 12yo, and too old for us to tell her that she can't go anywhere at all

APOV on Autism