Do you tell?

Avatar for mary_ellen03
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Do you tell?
8
Thu, 01-17-2008 - 11:51am

-My 8 year old son is in Tae Kwon Do.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2003
In reply to: mary_ellen03
Thu, 01-17-2008 - 12:30pm

Yes, I would tell. First, though, does your ds know about his diagnosis? Something I heard recently was to tell your children as soon as they understand. That way you can control whether the child hears their diagnosis with a positive or negative spin. If your child overhears the diagnosis from someone else and with a negative spin, they are likely to always think of their diagnosis as a negative thing.

You'd also probably want to put a positive spin on it when you approach other parents. I'd say something along the lines of how impressed you are with the other kids who treat your son like a regular kid even tho' he sometimes has "off" moments due to his autism. Admittedly, he's pretty high functioning, but it sure makes it easier for him to function when he has such good kids around him treating him well even when he's having a bad day and struggling.

I've told the parents of my kids' friends and I've told their scout and youth group leaders. I figure it makes it easier on both the kids and their leaders when the leaders know what's going on so respond appropriately in a difficult situation.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2008
In reply to: mary_ellen03
Thu, 01-17-2008 - 1:02pm

dont feel like u have to tell, but tell because u just want to inform them, so that they arent looking at your son as if hes the weirdo of the bunch! theres an explanation for his actions, and i bet they would be more sensitive towards his needs if they new why he was acting the way he did!!

:)
Amy

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
In reply to: mary_ellen03
Thu, 01-17-2008 - 1:30pm

Hi Mary,


I don't tell parents.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2001
In reply to: mary_ellen03
Thu, 01-17-2008 - 1:33pm
I think it is an indivisual decision, but for me I would probably not tell all the parents but would tell the individuals in charge of an activity.

 


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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
In reply to: mary_ellen03
Thu, 01-17-2008 - 2:02pm

In general I'm a big proponent of telling.

                                

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2007
In reply to: mary_ellen03
Thu, 01-17-2008 - 2:42pm
Hi. In response to your general question: I tell, boy do I tell. My ds is only 4.5, but ever since his dx 2 years ago, I am such a blabbermouth about it. I tell EVERYONE, I don't know why. My dh is the complete opposite. It is such a personal choice, each person has their own comfort level and all... but in my opinion, telling people helps them to understand and try to relate better with ds- so if and when he joins activities in the community, I will still be telling, if they don't already know by then. :-) Jennifer
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-28-2007
In reply to: mary_ellen03
Thu, 01-17-2008 - 5:12pm

Lol, Jennifer,

I also am a bit of a blabbermouth. I am better than I used to be though. Now I only tell those who have daily interaction with my boys. Like the Tae kwon Do instructor, teachers etc. The neighbours figured it out as I have the Autism awareness ribbon on the car. Oh and the PE teacher from 1s grade lives across the street, hee hee.

Dee

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Registered: 03-27-2003
In reply to: mary_ellen03
Thu, 01-17-2008 - 5:36pm
I only tell if I feel it warrants an explanation. Otherwise I don't worry about it. ;) I have only told family and of course school faculty. Haley has told kids she hangs around with sometimes at school but that's all. I've never felt the need to tell any other parents yet.



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Mom to Erin (19) and Haley (10yo Aspie)


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Mom to Erin (19) and Haley (10yo Asp