Do your ASD kids know their limits?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Do your ASD kids know their limits?
12
Wed, 05-09-2007 - 2:42pm

One of the things that I love about Henry is how he knows when he has had enough. At Scouts the other evening, the leader taught the boys to play Ultimate Frisbee. At first, I thought, "Oh, no!" Because active team sports are not one of Henry's strengths, but he played happily. Most of the kids seemed to be on about the same skill level, and it was a fairly easy game. It was very warm outside, so I was glad I brought bottled water for us both. About 45 minutes into the playing, they all stopped to go inside to the water fountain. When they came back outside, Henry walked up to me and said, "Mama, I'm tired."


That's all he has to say. I KNOW that child is finished when he says those three words. The leader came over and tried to convince him to come back and play for 10 more minutes, but there was no way, no how, that Henry was going to do anything else. He was done. I told the leader that Henry wasn't feeling well, and he wasn't going to play anymore.


I just wondered if that's typical of ASD kids--that they just know when they've had enough. Or am I just extra-lucky?


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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-12-2005
Wed, 05-09-2007 - 4:23pm

Jade knows her limits like that. I don't know if it came naturally or if it was because of a certain therapy we did with her over the course of 5 years, or a little of both. But she knows when it's time to quit, when she's had enough.

Eva, on the other had, is clueless about limits... of any kind. She'll push herself until she either falls over or has melted down into a screaming fit. Doesn't matter what it is. She treats daily activities, and life in general like an addict. She rings every last little bit out of them, and then keeps on giong. It'll be realy cool of we can teach her to focus that drive... but for now it's out of control.

I was just writing to my dad telling him about Eva's latest trip to the urgent care clinic. The nurses, who know her on sight now, asked when she was going to realize she isn't immortal. Her response was "What? Me? Of course I'm not immortal. But if Ive gotta go out I wanna go out with a bang... or a splat, a crunch, or to the symphony of twisting metal." SHE, of course, was talking about her love of the more extreme sports, but I think that sums it up for just about everything in her life... except math and history homework.

~Candes

APOV on Autism

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-16-2006
Wed, 05-09-2007 - 6:37pm

Hooray!!!!!!!!!!!

On occasion I have had Adam say he's "all done" when he is finished with something or if it's getting to be over his head.

I LOVE moments like that because it kinda nips a tantrum in the butt if there is gonna be one.

Love to hear someone else has that great joy too.

Nora

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2003
Wed, 05-09-2007 - 10:06pm

Limits?


Those are for other people:


"Mom,

-Paula

visit my blog at www.onesickmother.com
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Wed, 05-09-2007 - 10:52pm

Isaac has been known to go either way.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 05-09-2007 - 10:54pm

They must really have a great presentation about Scouts at school, because Henry was EXTREMELY excited about going to the meeting and joining Scouts when he came home from school with the flyer.


It was so rare that he got excited about anything that I was all for it.


iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2006
Thu, 05-10-2007 - 1:48am

Robin,


I'm just curious, Henry is in a public school, right?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 05-10-2007 - 11:27am

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2007
Fri, 05-18-2007 - 6:00pm
Hi,two parents who are extremely lucky,1 less thing to worry about.My son also knows when enough is enough.yvonne xxx
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 05-18-2007 - 7:01pm

Ditto what paula said.

Mike is working recognizing his own emotions still. He can't yet label when he is mad, etc. We aren't getting anywhere fast with this but he will use the 5 point scale which is helping.

But if he is doing something he enjoys or even is just ok with and then reaches his limit, nope he has no clue what so ever and you have to be a careful observer because he will go from OK to meltdown in no time flat making the wedding we are going to this summer RATHER stressful.

Heck this kid won't even take a break when he is stressed out. It is an objective we have been working on for 3 years. He is making some minimal progress in that if his aide tells him he has to take a break he won't fly into a fit and may actually transition to take a break and that is huge.

It is so bad that Mike doesn't want to go many places because he is afraid he will get out of control and in trouble and won't be able to stop himself. He will flat out refuse to go at all and it may be a big problem.

Recently we did have something close in that if we go somewhere that Mike doesn't like right away he will ask to leave or go home (like swimming last week). This is progress so hopefully we will get to where he can recognize when he is overstimulated and ready to leave.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 05-18-2007 - 10:46pm

Tom is almost 5 and if he has time to think things through he can usually figure out his limits. For example, on Monday we had a busy afternoon and I wanted to go to Lowe's but I knew he was getting impatient. He normally likes going to Lowe's so I asked him if he wanted to go home or go to Lowe's (putting my preferred choice as the last thing he heard, sneaky bad mommy) and he told me he needed to go home and I took him at his word. Those kind of situations he's usually pretty honest about what he needs and how he feels.

But if something happens right on the spot that we haven't talked about or prepared for then he can slip into meltdown mode pretty easily. And it just depends on the day and the time and the issue whether or not he can pull it back together.

Heather

                                

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