Extremely Interesting Article

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Registered: 12-22-2003
Extremely Interesting Article
20
Wed, 05-30-2007 - 11:52pm

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/femail/article.html?in_article_id=458563&in_page_id=1879

I have a hard time imagining how any of us "spectrum moms" could exist as Alphas- but if any of them exist on this board, please understand, my intention is not to offend.

I think this article may have actually given me a sense of superiority for a change! It's nice to let go of that inferiority complex, even if just for a little while. :-)

Amy

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Thu, 05-31-2007 - 9:32pm

well, I can tell you one good thing that came out of this thread....I have a whole new respect for you, Candes.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 05-31-2007 - 10:55pm

Did I hear bra burning!

Oh I am all over letting the girls hang free if they didn't give me a black eye when I ran.

Renee

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Registered: 03-03-2006
Thu, 05-31-2007 - 11:19pm

I know that I am new here and I tried to bite my tongue. I just can't. I have read the article and all of the comments and I have to say that I think that it is great that you posted this. I am an alfa by nature and I live in THE alfa community. This isn't about stay at home vs working moms...this is about eating dinner and doing homework in the car everynight and worse on weekends. Now if that is your cup of tea that is fine with me but I make the active DECISION not to do that. I get tired of being treated like I am lazy or being told that if I didn't have 5 or if I didn't have a special needs child I would be able to do that too (with the look of pity for my children and I). I have a blackberry, I also have 5 kids in school and am busier than ever, I do my share of scheduling and free time but I always make it a priority to let my kids ride their bikes, hang out with their friends, and do unsupervised crafts, as well as fitting in homework, family time, over 12 loads of laundry per week, home cooked meals daily, an activity here and there etc...(believe me I work FULL time, as you all do). I have kids who get straight A's and kids who don't, but all I care about is if they tried their hardest, learned and had fun. I have a flexible structure and routine in my home. You would be hard pressed to find toys or games in the main part of my house. That is because of my own AS and tendency to get overstimulated. That doesn't mean we don't have fun. I work very hard to keep myself from overscheduling, overdoing and keeping up with Mrs. Jones all the while being looked down upon or pitied for it.

The one thing I think that we all have agreed on here is that whether you are an alfa or a beta it is most important that you made a choice. A choice that you believe is in the best interests of your family and sanity. I see alfa moms as being acknowledged for this choice whether it is agreed with or not and I see society as a whole assuming that being a beta is a fall back position for those who CAN'T be alfa's. It is nice that people are acknowledging that it is actually a parental choice not laziness that keeps us from scheduling non stop, pushing constantly etc...

Everyone who wrote in regarding this should pat themselves on the back...you are all passionate loving women who have made choices for your families...alfa or beta...out of love and truely good intention. Too many people don't do that. To all of you, keep up the good work, you know what is in your heart and it certainly isn't laziness or ice!

Cassie

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Registered: 11-28-2006
Fri, 06-01-2007 - 12:39am

Great Post Cassie!

I read it in the beginning and started thinking about who I am. The best thing about debates and opinions is that it makes you think, whether you agree with the opinion or not. I love doing that!

I can think one way, and totally see another's point of view. I may not conform to the idea, but I could be open enough to say I agree to disagree. But I can also see two sides of the coin.

I get really heated on a ebay discussion board that I have belonged to for the last 6 yrs. I particularly get involved with social issues, politics ect.... I can argue, but try to be respectful at the same time.... Sometimes I cross the line, but I don't mean too. If I do, I come back to apologize for my words I type.

I love it!

Were all different, and if we weren't life would certainly be boring.

Good job Amy on posting something thats different and has so many other people's opinion's attached to it! I loved reading about it, and hey you guys might see me doing something like this (cuz I love it!) in the future...

Lainie

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Registered: 08-10-2006
Fri, 06-01-2007 - 8:16am
ROFL!!!

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Christine

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Registered: 01-16-2006
Fri, 06-01-2007 - 11:29am
Your son is gonna love leapster. Both of mine have them and they love love love them...
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-16-2006
Fri, 06-01-2007 - 11:33am
Please don't refrain from posting anything. I don't agree with the article but that doesn't mean it shouldn't be posted or discussed. I gave my opinion on the article, not the poster, or whether it should be posted.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2006
Fri, 06-01-2007 - 1:19pm
I think so! He actually was asking for the Nintendo DS, but after looking at the available games, they just seemed too old for him right now. The games for the Leapster seemed more his age range (5). He is a computer junkie, but at least he is learning! :)
Christine

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Christine

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Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 06-01-2007 - 2:16pm

Amy.....

Hey, I wasn't offended by the posting. I find the subject great fodder for debate and I'm glad you posted it. I didn't want my "poo" comment to offend others though.

I'm a little peeved with myself for not seeing the humor in the article though! A bit Aspie of me, I suppose. I think I read it too soon after a play date encounter with a very snobby mom.

I get a bit dismayed by my personal Alpha/Beta mix though. I have a hard time finding other moms that are semi-organized with child-centered homes, but are still laid back and not too fussy about toys on the floor or sticky, strawberry juice toddler faces. I'm educated but not well off by any means. I live in a very urban area with a high population of working poor. I often get the vibe that other moms in my mom's group feel sorry for me...LOL

chrystee

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Registered: 01-16-2006
Fri, 06-01-2007 - 2:40pm
My Nt son is 5 and PDD-NOs DD is 4 and they love them. Initially we bought one for DS but we quickly had to get a second one for DD because she always wanted it... I like the way the cartridges get more challenging, up to I believe 4rth grade level...

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