Feeling A Little Guilty
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| Wed, 08-08-2007 - 5:01pm |
Earlier this summer, I posted a message about my possibly going to work as a 1:1 at our children's school. I'm semi-friends with this little boy's mom (playground friends, if you will) and this little boy was in my daughter's pre-school class way back when she was first Dx'd. So, essentially, I'm very familiar with the boy, familiar with his mom, and familiar with their situation.
Last year, they went through four 1:1's. Not because of the child, because the 1:1's simply didn't have the work ethic necessary (or in some cases, reliable transportation) in order to do the job. Long story short, I told this mom that I would be willing to be her son's 1:1 should the need arise. She said she'd probably take me up on the offer because 1:1 #4 was PG and due the first part of August so she didn't expect this person to return in the fall.
Fast forward to this afternoon. The mom calls me to say that she's been in touch with the district, yet again. Apparently the most recent 1:1 had her baby early, so she's planning on returning to her previous position. The mom explained to the district "person" that while the most recent 1:1 did nothing wrong, she really wanted me to be her child's 1:1 because of my knowledge of autism and her belief that I would be much more capable of helping her son achieve his specific goals. (A very rare quality for 1:1's in our area.)
Anyway, it sounds as if the most recent 1:1 is going to either be reassigned (to a less desirable school and/or student), or perhaps even unemployed, because of me. I feel terrible. It was never my intent to put somebody out of work, especially somebody with a new baby to take care of. I almost told the mom to call the district back and tell them that I was no longer interested in the job!
Oh, and the worst part...the most recent 1:1 is friends with our daughter's 1:1!!! Not close friends from what I understand, but they know each other.
*sigh* Why is that when you try to do something good for somebody, you inevitably end up hurting somebody else???
Amy


Amy could you try to explain yourself to that mom that you never intended this poor girl to miss out working with her son?
Granted you would be a better choice HOWEVER you didn't factor this into the equation of life.
OH...........sigh. What else is there to do really. Explain you want to be his 1:1 BUT you didn't want to put anyone into a weird situation over all this.
Sorry you are going through this.
Got to run soon, getting Adam's follow up appt after starting the Adderall.
Love
me
http://i153.photobucket.com/albums/s225/irishwildrose/pp2.jpg
Don't feel guilty. First the girl most certainly won't lose her job. If she was any good at all there is such a desperate need for classroom aides and 1:1's over all that I am SURE not only do they have a place for her, they likely have a few. The district was probably thrilled to have an extra able body who was already trained freed up.
Second, it was still a wise move. The mom was being prepared and had made the appropriate steps to make sure her son had a qualified, consistent 1:1 for this school year. This lady having a brand new baby, well there is always chance of inconsistency or change of mind. That baby is still going to be teeny when mom goes back to work and a lot of moms find they can't do it or are called out a lot for kid illness, etc.
Renee
I was coming here to give my 2 cents and found that Renee already gave it for me. Again.
So, Ditto What She Said.
~Candes
I third what Renee said.
-Paula
visit my blog at www.onesickmother.com
You know Renee (and Candes and Paula) I got a call from my MIL tonight that confirmed what you said (and dittoed). One of MIL's co-workers has a little girl in kindergarten and although they fought for a 1:1 the district refused. This particular school happens to start before the other district schools and they've been in class for the last week. Low and behold, the little girl is struggling so much that they've decided to call another IEP to write in a 1:1 for the child. My MIL was calling to see if she could "drop my name" to her co-worker.
Well, I'm not interested in working for this particular school because THAT was the principal who told me Claire would never make it in a mainstream classroom...but at least I know that the need for 1:1's does truly exist, so I don't feel quite so bad anymore.
Thanks all!
Amy
Girl friend, I was about to ditto everyone else, and then you went and got educated all by yourself. I mentioned in Liam's classroom that I was taking my parapro test this Fall and they were jumping all over me to start this week, and that kindy needed some parapros, lol. Tuly, we are never in shortage!
Dee