forgetfulness
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| Wed, 09-05-2007 - 8:45am |
Victor has been in 6th grade for a month now. I just got an e-mail from his reading teacher that said Victor has earned detention on Thursday for not being prepared for class 3 times. Monday the 27th, Friday the 31st and yesterday. Victor will forget his head if it's not attached firmly to his body. His organizational skills are almost nonexistant. I understand that since Victor is mainstreamed, he should be held accountable to mainstream rules, however knowing that he has organizational problems, is it fair for it to be only a 3 time strike rule for him? Am I being an overprotective mom? I just can't help but feel that he's just as frustrated about not being prepared for class as I am. He didn't even tell me that he had gotten detention on Thursday. I agreed, depending on the time frame that detention runs, that he could do detention after school. I do not see that it's fair however, when the child still needs someone to stand at his locker and show him how to pack his backpack, that he should be punished for not being prepared for a class. I wrote a letter to the special ed teacher in the hopes that she will be able to advise me better one way or the other.
2 hours up and ready to go back to bed now with the start of a migraine.
Alexis

Alexis,
If the child has problem with organizational skills, the school should be helping him, not punishing him. They wouldn't punish a blind kid for not knowing his colors.
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Okay to add to this, I found out that Dad had been telling Vic to leave his book at home to read because we did not know that the book needed to go back to school everyday. Now, I understand that he has extra time at school to be prepared for class however, if he leaves it at home, he can't come home and get the things he left and they refuse to allow him to call home for me to bring it to him. I think that 3 times isn't fair when he leaves the things at home. When he leaves the items in his locker than 3 times is more than adequate before detention is given. We are unable to pick him up after school because it's an hour after school and exactly an hour after he gets out of school, his sister gets off the bus, so I need to be home for her.
I heard back from the spec. ed teacher and she seems to want to try detention to see if it will deter him from forgetting to bring things either to school, or to home. I am willing to give it one half hour lunch detention to see, however, the detention teacher needs to be made aware of his needs. I do agree that he shouldn't be punished but it seems that it's going to happen.
Alexis
I would have to agree with Paula on this one.
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Christine
Dear Alexis,
Mainstreaming is NOT supposed to mean left high and dry. And I am a little dismayed by the special ed director thinking that detention will help him not forget, unless you, knowing your boy better, know that the fear of breaking rules and being further detained .. will really help him remember. It might. But your description of him sounds like his ASD might mean that someone, that would be a teacher, will need to actually put in some work here and create an organizational support system of learning, one designed to be slowly withdrawn as he learns what to do.
I think you may need to start kicking up some dust with this school. I'm guessing there is not an IEP, therefore no team discussions about how he is doing and what to do to improve his work and focus? I just don't think detentions are great learning tools with our kids !!! (I actually don't think they really do much for MOST kids, but that's another subject)
But kids with disabilities have to be given the tools to compensate for where their disability affects them. If a kid had a severe stutter, would you give him detention to get him to stop?
yours,
Sara
Alexis,
Most middle schools have resource as an elective. In this period the kids go thru their assignment and catch up on their school work. This way they are taught to organize. I have heard from parents and next I am going to ask Sravan to have this as an elective. This skill goes a long way in life.
CHeck around to see if Victor can get such help.
Anandhi
Oh no, there is a very specific IEP in place. As a matter of fact, we're working on getting him into G&T as well as redoing his OT eval. Victor does get very upset over breaking rules, so it might work to help him remember everything but if not, this will be the one and ONLY time he does detention for not being prepared for class. I'm irritated that I was not told that the chapter book is like his agenda and supposed to be packed daily. Since finding this out today, I have decided that we will simply get a second copy of whatever book he is reading so he has one for home and one for school. I know this doesn't help Victor remember to bring the book too and from school, but if this is one of those "tricks" to help him succeed in school, I don't see a problem with it. I mean, in elementary school, library books were not allowed to come home because he would forget to take them back to school.
The school claims that since Victor is given frequent reminders during the day and extra time to get prepared for class, that he should always be prepared for class every day. From what the teachers are telling me, it's not a matter of him being prepared between classes, it's him remembering to get the items from home to school or vice versa. I do not know how to help him remember every item he's supposed to have if they do not tell me what I'm to remind him off having. They have a coach walk him through his agenda at the end of the day to tell him what he is or isn't supposed to have in the afternoons. I've talked them down to one lunch detention ( half hour) instead of two, this way he gets that sense of what can happen by not being prepared and yet he isn't being overpunished for something that is honestly not his fault.
If organizational skills continue to be a problem, then he will not serve another detention, of that I am sure. Well, he just got home and doesn't seem to be bothering at all about having detention, so I doubt this is going to affect him in the least.
Alexis