Frustration/Anger Control

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2010
Frustration/Anger Control
3
Mon, 05-17-2010 - 8:50pm
I am new here... We are just beginning to look for ways to help our 5 yr old son with his PDD. Any ideas on anger management or frustration control? He gets SO upset and angry and it just keeps escalating...Thanks for your input! -Jeni
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2007
Tue, 05-18-2010 - 4:10am
Welcome to the Board! When our son was dx'd, the neuropsych recommended that both we and the school read Ross Greene's "The Explosive Child". It made a world of difference in the way we interacted with our son. I think it is a great place to start.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2010
Tue, 05-18-2010 - 8:45am
Thank You! :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2008
Tue, 05-18-2010 - 8:58am

For ASD kids, often the challenge is not so much anger management techniques (which involve you being able to recognise when you are angry, and respond appropriately before you lose your cool) as RECOGNISING what anger feels like (as opposed to many other things, like fear, embarrassment, hunger, confusion, etc). I don't want to paint a rosy picture for you and say there are easy techniques to teach this because in my experience it takes a lot of time and patience and skill. But the key is really to recognise that it is an ASD thing, not an anger thing, and to deal with it that way. Recognise flash points and problems and head them off, if you can, because your DS does not have the skills to do this himself and he will not develop them the way an NT kid will. Break everything down into discrete manageable steps but also be aware that you cannot just give them the skills they need: they need to learn them differently, and at a slower pace. We are just now, at 11, getting a handle on avoiding and dealing with explosions, and we've been tackling it since he was 3, and I know a lot of ASD kids who are in the same position.


You need a 2 pronged approach, both of which are not easy. 1. You need to find out what is causing the anger and this is by no means always obvious! then you need to deal with the problem and teach your DS to find ways to deal with the problem. 2. You need to teach the skills of recognising, and dealing with, emotions, and again, this is not always obvious.


good luck


Kirsty, mum to Euan (11, Aspergers Syndrome) Rohan (7, NT) and Maeve (4, NT)


"My definition of housework is to sweep the room with a glance"


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