Grrrrr, dh (&&****%$#$%**&%$)

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Registered: 09-09-2005
Grrrrr, dh (&&****%$#$%**&%$)
2
Tue, 07-25-2006 - 3:47pm

Cian's preschool eval through the school system was scheduled for Aug 21st (3 weeks into the school year) and they just called with a cancellation for tomorrow; of course I snatched it up.

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Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 07-25-2006 - 8:17pm

I so understand where you are coming from. My DH is a teacher too. We moved here and he started a new job when I was 6-7 months pregnant with David. Well I came home from the hospital on Monday and he went back to work on Tuesday because he didn't want to look bad at work. We were staying at his parents house and they were supposed to help me out. They left at 9am on tuesday and didn't get home until 5pm and asked me on the way in what I had planned for dinner. HELLO!!!!!!!!!

So on wednesday, DH stayed home much to his dismay because I had it out on him that I needed help. I had to carry Emily (22months then) upstairs for her nap on Tuesday, had a newborn and 2 difficult children, etc. Inlaws stayed home that day and played the good grandparents. Thursday he went back to work because he had only been at the job a few months and couldn't possibly take another day off and again, my inlaws left for the entire day. Funny, I don't think his bosses would have looked down on him for taking a few days after the birth of his son. Just thinking.

It is still often the same and it seems that the job takes a bigger priority than us. It is really hard sometimes. I begun to be very clear with what I need of him and it has helped and for the little things I just don't expect it. I have also learned not to count on my inlaws either.

But I am much clearer on what I need his support for and he usually steps up to the plate. Ya know when we keep doing everything for them they just expect it. We keep fixing everything for them and we just get angry. When we hint or ask if we could possibly have help, they hmmmm and haw until we figure out how to do it without them. But we can't be whimps. We have to tell them clearly what we need of them and not let them get away without giving the support we need.

My more than 2 cents on the matter.

Renee

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Registered: 05-16-2006
Tue, 07-25-2006 - 8:36pm

I totally know where you are coming from. My dh has a sales job that he just call off when needed. He needs a ten day notice and this lifestyle we've be dealt it doesn't mesh all that well.
Since it's second shift he was able to help with morning therpy session for early intervention (he still pats himself on the back). Now everything execpt preschool is afternoons. I do it all, housework, momwork and I try to actually work for sanity reasons.
I have NO support from family (my dad on occassion he's up his sister a$$ who's always in the hospital).
If you lived in Pittsburgh I would LOVE to help ya out. I feel for you too.
I'll have a glass of wine for you, post preggers then you can.

Nora