Hard, low place

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-28-2007
Hard, low place
13
Tue, 10-23-2007 - 10:55am

Some of you may know (and I'm not afraid to admit it) I am dx with a mood disorder . Some pdocs say depression, others cyclothymia, (mild bp). I tend to cycle rapidly with mini cycles within, if that makes sense. I crashed last night big time. Liam had a horriic day at school, arrived home in a foul foul mood, threw a mini table and chairs etc etc. He eventually calmed down, but I fell apart pretty rapidly. I got the kids fed, jammied and bedded, and then I proceded to rock in the corner of the kitchen floor for ages. Dh was working late and had a swim practice. I ended up calling my counsellor (still hasn't called back) and before I knew it I was talking to an emotional distress hotline. I pulled myself back from that dark dark place. Dh got home to me rocking in the corner and I told him everything.

This morning I could barely drag myself out of bed, I literally felt like I was being held down on the mattress, like I was sedated, although I wasn't. I finally got the energy to get kids ready for school, and after I ate something I felt better, but I'm scared I am going down again. I know some of you know that place I speak of. I am waiting for my counsellor to call back. I think I need a new med, lexapro ain't doing a whole lot right now.I don't mean to dump on you, I just need this outlet right now; noone around me gets it; oh they act like they do, but unless you are here in this hole, no one gets it, kwim?

Dee





Edited 10/23/2007 10:58 am ET by roanmom

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2004
In reply to: roanmom
Wed, 10-24-2007 - 5:04am

Hi, Dee,


I was planning on just lurking, but I had to sign in to send a few hugs.


Sidney

APOV on Autism
APOV on Autism
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2003
In reply to: roanmom
Wed, 10-24-2007 - 10:37am

Dee,


I hope you are feeling much better today.

Samantha
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2006
In reply to: roanmom
Wed, 10-24-2007 - 5:05pm

Hey Dee,


Hope you are feeling better...I sent you a message through Myspace cause iVillage wouldnt let me through here..stupid.. :).

< < Photobucket

Christine

Pages