He doesn't avoid touch...
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He doesn't avoid touch...
| Sun, 08-07-2005 - 2:50am |
ugh, I'm on my 3rd book about AS or homeschooling AS kids, and I keep finding the descriptions are right on, except my son doesn't avoid touching people. Actually quite the opposite, he has a hard time respecting personal boundaries, misses ques that most people would take as "please don't touch me now" (btw, I do this really bad too). I'm almost starting to think, well maybe he's not AS if he doesn't have this "approach avoidance" I keep seeing. Can anyone offer advice, support? I just felt so at home at first reading about AS until reading all this about avoiding touch.

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Ya know, on another funny/odd thing on this. Cait was never considered tactile defensive when young. She hated clothes/shoes etc and that was a real challenge, but didn't growl or pull away when anyone touched her. She would let them touch her and didn't react much at all particularly if she was already doing something.
Well, as she got older it seems it just never dawned on her to pull away or something because she really hates to be touched! Either that or this particular symptom has gotten way worse. She was one of these really mellow ones in school (withdrawn, but mellow and well behaved) so I think maybe that is why. But now that she is older she will vocalize to knock it off, don't touch her, etc. Sometimes she is more sensitive about it than Mike. He will cuddle with me pretty regularly and will hug me when I ask. Maybe because he was more obviously tactile senstive younger I worked on it more. Cait rarely will give physical affection and if she does it is a whimpy quicky thing that totally says "ok, go away now"
Course it is possible I just didn't notice as much when younger. I am a bit tactile defensive myself so I wouldn't notice if they are not cuddly. Dave is cuddly and I like his because he is so rough. Definitely there! But Emily is so soft in touch that it makes my skin crawl. Poor baby, I have to force myself to hug her as much as the others and give her affection because I never want her to know that her particular brand of physical affection is very difficult for me to deal with.
Renee
My DS, (dx'd AS) is very "sensory seeking". This is also common AS behavior. Mouthing everything until 3. (Still does sometimes) Loves soft feathery or satiny things. Also has difficulty knowing others boundries. Big hugs calm him down when tantrumming and he loves to make a "Vaughn" sandwich with cusions on top of him.
Hope this helps.
Shelley
I can completely relate. I feel bad saying so but that how it is to hug Trevor. He sort of is too soft yet awkwardly clingy. I don't know how to describe it but I get uncomfortable. Yes the more I learn about ASD I wonder if I see similarities in myself.
Amanda
Let's see....Nathan goes back and forth!! He can be very affectionate--lots of hugs, kisses, smelling LOL!! And he tends to BUG THE CRAP out of Tyler!!! Always touching Ty and making Ty scream for him to leave him alone!!!! Nathan also loves to rub his cheek next to mine....he says it's so soft!! On the other hand, there are times where he will give "quick" hugs, and then want to be left alone. He even tells me to leave his room or go away. He does this nicely though. He says, "I'm ok, you can go now." Or he says, "You can go now, go back to the kitchen (computer, etc), I'm ok...just playing."
Michelle
Finn had the issues with clothes, but none of the food texture issues that are so common.
I often tell Finn to give me space, stop climbing on me. not that he ever listens urgh
blessed be
Joelle
http://messageboards.ivillage.com/iv-bcwritinglif
Love and Light, Joelle
Homeschooling mom to a 11yr old hydrogen molecule.
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