"But he has such good eye contact..."
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"But he has such good eye contact..."
| Sat, 08-26-2006 - 7:59pm |
If one more supposed specialist/expert says, "but he's so bright and has such good eye contact, he can't be PDD" I think I'll scratch their eyes out!!

I can so relate. We also have had this happen continuously, but I don't let it bother me. In fact, I am careful about using word "autism" with most people, as "sensory issues" really describe why Malcolm is the way he is better to most people, unless they are professionals or know someone who is autistic. Malcolm has always had great eye contact, and now he is often very good at conversations and at figuring out socially appropriate behavior, maybe not as well as most 9 year olds, but certainly enough to "pass". And if knowing he is autistic only confuses people, well, why bother? Anyways, I still hold that whether or not he wants the world to know about his autism should be a decision that will be up to him, really, and if I broadcast this term to the entire world at large, I will take that choice away from him.
Is Liam getting any OT and/or sensory diet at school? This can be a big help if you can get it for him, lessen the need for restraint...
Our new-ish tactic for shopping is to always bring MP3 player loaded with all his favorite tunes and he happily putters along after me listening, bopping and even singing. And sometimes he tries to carry on a little conversation with me JUST a little too loudly, which usually amuses other shoppers. But then he is starting to look like SUCH a teenager now, gasp...
I hope the risperdal goes well for Liam. I do know other older kids who are doing well on it! I know that aisle thing, Malcolm likes to hang out in the cereal box aisle when I am grocery shoping!
yours,
Sara
ilovemalcolm
Just had to chime in with an amusing event. I've been looking for some shopping strategies for my 4 year old lately, since it's become a real problem. She's really getting too big to shove in a cart now and hauling her anywhere is getting to be a scene. Anyway, at a seminar the other night the instructor kept coming back to "give her a slurpee when you start" and I kept saying "my child is hypoglycemic, that might give her a siezure...using food is inappropriate for her" and she could not come off the slurpee thing. Now I know that I could substitute some other food item, but I don't use food for rewards (or distractions) because of that creates potential for problems that I just don't want to deal with down the road. The instructor just couldn't get that. So, until I get better guidance when we start OT I'm just doing my shopping on school days.
Mary
Oh, man! Does the instructor HAVE a 4 year old with sensory issues? Slurpee? Dropping it, spilling it down the front of clothes, running into other shoppers, wandering off unattended, slurpee in hand? Well, yes, strong flavors do help our kids focus, but the realities of shopping are much more challenging than can be answered with a slurpee, PLEASE!
Gum does help my boy, I always carry sugarless gum for Malcolm because that really does help him focus. He asks for it sometimes when he's feeling overwhelmed, or else I offer (read : force) when the shirt is practically down the throat and this is the 3rd time I asked him to stop chewing on it!
Sara
ilovemalcolm
Cait had a horrible time shopping at 4. What helped was a visual schedule of what we would be doing as well as visual of the rules and some sort of reward at the end like going to the park, riding the little merry go round outside the store, etc. You could also think of another distraction to use in the store. For Mike it was headphones and music that worked great. BTW, if Mike is having a really off day I sometimes still put him in the cart and he is 10. He just sits in the basket part, usually with headphones. Usually it is only when I have all the kids and he is way overstimulated. Sometimes we have to do what they need not what society expects is appropriate for a child that age.
You will also want to find the reason for her shopping troubles.
For Cait at 4 it was not understanding what was going to happen and what was expected of her. By giving her the visuals it helped tons. Then she would know we were going to the grocery store, walmart and the bank then the park if she followed her rules. I also had stars that I would give for each store and if she had all her stars we went to the park. Also, in the beginning I made the stops at each store VERY short and only 1 or 2. Then as she was successful I added more.
For Mike it is simple overstimulation. The crowds, lights, movement, being bumped, noise, sends him into overload very quickly. So a visual schedule while it helps alot for him because he also needs a list, isn't enough in and of itself. For him (now at 10) we still keep shopping trips short and only 1 or 2 stops. If we do more we know that we have caused any of his wackyness ourselves. In big stores he either pushed the cart or holds onto the cart while I push. He is just overwhelmed and is afraid of losing us (he will lose track of us in that environment if we are 5ft away) If we are in too many stores he still wears his headphones and sits in the cart.
When Mike was 4 I just didn't take him. I didn't know what to do with him then and I didn't want to have him sit in the cart. It wasn't until he was about 7 that we got over that and got some good ideas. He also is great now 1:1 especially if you go when it isn't busy. Still has to hold onto or push the cart.
Renee
So, are you supposed to let the child take the Slurpee into the store? Typically stores frown on food and drinks inside. It's funny that the instructor couldn't let go of the Slurpee idea. I know some other people who have a hard time letting go once they get something in their heads. LOL!
Evelyn