Help - I'm so confused (m)
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|Fri, 08-15-2003 - 1:46pm|
OK, I can understand that there is a typical AS kid, but can't a child still be AS and not present as typical, especially in a clinical setting. He also had is semantic/pragmatic language eval on Wed. He did fine. I knew he would. He "knows" what to say in very specific circumstances because he's been taught by me, his sisters and his teachers, but that doesn't mean he always does it.
So anyway, to add to this, last night I took him to Borders books. He wouldn't pick out a small book, kept wanting expensive games or big dinosaur books. (I even found a small paperback dinosaur book for him to get.) Finally, I told him to come on or I'd just put the books down and we'd just go. He still didn't. So I put the books down, grabbed his arm and headed for the door. All HE** broke loose then. He was totally out of control - screaming, hitting my arms to get them off him. Trying to get away from me to run back to the children's area. I had to sit right there on the floor and hold him until he calmed down. This is a 7 1/2 year old (8 in November). I'm sorry, I didn't know "normal, gifted" almost 8 year olds had knock down drag out tantrums in stores. (note the sarcasm in that sentence) I kept trying to tell him that he was bothering the other people and needed to calm down. I told him maybe we'd come back when he was calm. He said, "What if the books are gone?" I told him I'd order them off the internet. LOL He still didn't calm down. Finally, I called dh to come and help me get him out of the store (he is small for his age, but still pretty wiry and strong.) I managed to get him out with the help of store employees holding the door for me and then met dh in the parking lot. I took my girls home and left dh to calm ds down - I was done. I had been so calm through the whole thing that. But honestly, the thing that kept me calm was remembering that he most likely DOES have AS and this happens to kids with that and he isn't doing this "to me." I really need that diagnosis to truly understand and help his behavior. No, he doesn't do EVERYTHING that is typical of an AS kid. But, he doesn't get social cues, he does inappropriate things to get attention from peers, he doesn't know who to kiss or hug and who not to without being told, he has this all encompassing interest in dinosaurs (although it does range to ocean creatures, reptiles and bugs sometimes). He will go off by himself showing no interest in other children and act like a dinosaur. Yes, he has friends at school, but guess what he plays with them...dinosaurs. When they don't want to play dinosaurs, he will occasionally play something else, like monsters. He spends most of his time at home either drawing (dinosaurs, bugs, monsters, ghosts, ocean creatures, etc. quite detailed) but his people are stick figures. He has no interest in drawing people. Or he is on the computer playing computer games. Kids from the neighborhood come over, he doesn't give them the time of day unless I make him.
I'm sorry for being so long and venting. I just really feel in my heart that this is what is going on with ds. He is a great kid, but I feel that he has AS and I want that validated. I need to have someone official (I do have a friend in the field that has "diagnosed" him after knowing him for 3 years and seeing him in every situation possible, but she has no way to make it official.) believe me. Not after seeing him once when he's a perfect angel. Everyone in that store thought he was 4 years old. He's almost 8!
Thanks for listening,