holiday gift question
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| Wed, 11-16-2005 - 2:36pm |
Sylvia is in preschool; she's in a class with a teacher and a classroom aide -- plus, 5 or 6 students in her class have one-on-one aides, and it appears to me as though all the aides tend to interact with all the kids. My question is, what's the holiday gift etiquette here? I'd like to get a little something for the teacher (is that appropriate?) -- maybe even something that Sylvia has made, or cookies she's helped decorate. But I'm not sure if I should get something for ALL the aides? Just the classroom aide? And what about the bus drivers? She has a different driver to and from school -- plus each bus driver has an aide, but there tends to be a lot of turnover among those aides and there's often a different one each week, so I'm not as concerned about them. I was thinking of just giving a card to the bus drivers -- is that okay, or am I supposed to give a small gift as well?
Anything we'd get would be very small, since we can't afford to make a huge deal out of these gifts. But I just don't know what's appropriate here. I don't even know the names of all the classroom aides, although I can find out. Maybe cards for the aides, and a little extra something for the teacher and classroom aide? How do you all handle the holidays?
Another question I have is this: Sylvia takes the bus to school, so unless I cram everything into her backpack, I'd need to come to school to drop everything off. Is this appropriate? I sort of wanted to keep everything subtle, and bursting into the classroom like Santa Clause would be the opposite of subtle!!! Can you tell I'm totally clueless about a) school things and b) Christmas (I'm Jewish)?
Jennifer

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I don't know what the "etiquette" is on this, but I have always given something small to everyone who has helped my son. Last year for the teachers/aides, I gave ornaments along with a card Eric had made and they appreciated that. Food seems to always be appreciated, especially if it is home-made.
If you are industrious and the class is small enough, you could get together with the other parents, collect donations and get one gift certificate from everyone for the teachers, like to toys r us or Target, or somewhere they can get things for the classroom. We did this with our speech therapist last year and he really appreciated it.
I have also given therapists the autism puzzle logo jewelry, keyrings etc. Looks like the ASA has some pretty handcrafted glass jewelry this year but haven't seen any prices. These gifts are a a bit expensive, but the professionals who work with ASA kids can appreciate it.
In my experience, they all particularly also love original art work by Eric. Last year I had Eric decorate a frame I made of popsicle sticks, put a small school photo of him in it, and made into a magnet. They seemed to like that too. Inexpensive and not too hard to do.
Just some ideas, you can tell I tend to be the artsy-craftsy type!
Katherine
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Oh my gosh, I can't believe I almost forgot the ST and OT. As my mom says, oy vey!
I guess my biggest problem now is that I'm unsure about exactly what the one-on-one aides do. Sylvia does not have a one-on-one aide, but as I said there are many of them in the classroom. I know they all love Sylvia -- I just don't know how much they actually do for her. I'd love to acknowledge them in some way, but as I said it gets crazy buying gifts for so many people (or even *making* gifts for so many people -- there are only so many hours in a day). I'd love to give cards (or artwork) to the aides but I don't know if it's insulting if I give them "less" than the teacher...
I guess what I could do is make mini muffins or something like that, wrap them in pretty cellophane, and give them -- along with a card -- to everyone. And then perhaps an additional little something for the teacher, who's really done a LOT for Sylvia... I just don't want to offend anyone!!!
Jennifer
I think it's really nice to recognize people. Especially someone like a bus driver who keeps your child safe.
That said... I know the bus drivers around here get cookies up the wazoo. And people mean really well, but how many cookies can you eat? I prefer cash (small amount) since the drivers make very little money or gift certificates (Dunkin' Donuts, since it seems everyone can find coffee or something they like.)
Cathy
Dear Jennifer,
Yes we have had our son in specials schools with lots of teachers and therapists PLUS we have outside therapists and teachers. This has been for over 5 years, lots of giving to consider at Holidays. We do also include the bus drivers and matrons! We tend to NOT be able to afford to do much, fortunately the school has a policy and class parents organize gathering a small donation for all the classrooms teachers. So for everyone else at Holidays, we make up a Holiday greeting card using a photo or 2 of him, a picture he has drawn, and now have him write the greetings. Then we reproduce them and give them to everyone. We have also baked, made candy, even a small-ish gift of money to drivers. It takes time and money, but we don't want to leave anyone out, really, as they all contribute so much to our lives!
I have taken the gifts to the school but left the bag of goodies to be distributed with the receptionist. I have also brought them when there is a class Holiday gathering and parents are included, does your school do this? I am actually glad you brought this up, as I need to get going on our projects!!!
yours,
Sara
ilovemalcolm
Rats, I hate that. I swore I posted a response and can't find it.
I find that just being remembered is what they like most. I know they get lots of cookies but gift cards for all those people gets pricey. I do give to everyone. Last year what I did was to put just a bunch of small baggies (sandwich sized) with like 3-4 cookies in it together and tied some ribbon on it. I gave those to everyone, then for the main teachers that are most special I did give them an extra gift on top of it. Last year it was a paperback copy of "curious incident of a dog at nighttime", prior years it was starbucks gift certificates, candles or ornaments.
In addtion to the PT, OT, ST, don't forget the RSP for those in grade school.
Between my 4 kids last year and all thier IEPS I had I think like 12-15 teachers/therapists to give to. Only a couple got stuff ontop of the cookies. Those teachers that I felt went above and beyond the call of duty. However, They all loved the cookies, but then again, I make some killer cookies if I do say so. Ok, so I got a new jenn aire stove last year and love bon appetite magazine.
Renee
I haven't had a chance to read the other responses, but personally I think that gift certificates are a good bet. I'd probably get a gift certificate for the local arts/craft store, book store, or office supply store. In fact, at my 2nd grader's school, the teachers have a binder in the office, full of their wish lists. They all want stuff they can use in the classroom; stuff they would ordinarily have to pay for themselves since school budgets are tight.
I remember when my son started kindergarten, the teachers even told us parents that as much as they love cute little handmade knick knacks, they'd really prefer that we check out their for-the-classroom wish lists. Sometimes they want something expensive, like a bookshelf or a rug, and parents chip in together for it.
Evelyn
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HTH
Sonya
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