How to explain doctor's visits to child?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2006
How to explain doctor's visits to child?
7
Wed, 07-05-2006 - 12:50am

What do I say? I don't want to tell my 5 year old his behaviour is odd and it's freakin' me out! ;)

Seriously, do I say we are just going chat with the doctor, he may ask you some questions, etc. But, how do we tell why we are going? I don't want him to think he's ill. We've had family and pets go to the doctor and die soon after. It's easier if he has the flu, because well, you have to go because you've had the flu for a month and it just won't go away. Last year for a month he had a high fever, vomitting, etc for a couple of days and get better only to have it come back a week later. This went on for weeks so we took him in, the doctor looked him over, said it was a virus reinfecting him and he should recover with time. He was told he was just fine and there was a conclusion with one visit. It's pretty easy to explain why in this sort of situation.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 07-05-2006 - 1:10am

Will he ask? I don't think Mike asked at that age. He asks me now what kind of doctor it is so he knows what to expect (talking doctor, etc). He knows about his diagnosis now too but I am not sure he relates those doctors visits to his ASD. They both been going to different specialists for so long I think they think it is a normal thing to do.

I would just tell him it is a check up with a talking doctor. You don't really have to tell him all of why you are going. I doubt he is ready fro that much info at his age. My kids honestly have not questioned it. Cait did on the last trip to the neuro because of a seizure. She is 12. He may need to know exactly what to expect at the doctor such this is a visit without shots, he will get to stay dressed, etc. It is just to talk for a bit.

If you don't want to talk about your concerns infront of him with the doctor you could type them up and give them to the doctor. I would try to keep it brief and organized though. Less than a page. So that it isn't that hard for them to read over.

Renee

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2006
Wed, 07-05-2006 - 1:30am
Hi, Renee, thank you. :) He *may* ask. And even if he doesn't ask, might wonder and come to all sorts of conclusions. I like the check-up with the talking doctor a lot, that is what I will tell him. I really don't like talking about him while he's in the room so all three of us are going and I will go in first with dh and ds in the waiting room. I will explain that the ped appointment previous wasn't helpful and that I would like to a see an Asperger's specialist. He will probably want to talk with ds so I will go out and get him. Then take him back to dad while I talk with the doctor again. If not, we can come back for another visit.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2003
Wed, 07-05-2006 - 7:37am

When Peter was that age we kind of lied.

-Paula

visit my blog at www.onesickmother.com
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2006
Wed, 07-05-2006 - 9:23am
Cool, thank you Paula. :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-07-2004
Wed, 07-05-2006 - 3:02pm
I wrestled with this also. After a couple appts he asked me why he had to go again. I just told him the Dr. heard how smart he was and just wanted to talk to him for a while. I don't know if that is the right way or not. I couldn't think of anything else that wouldn't hurt his feelings.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2004
Wed, 07-05-2006 - 3:47pm

Dear Paula.

HA! We kinda used that one, too, well, we called her a talking doctor and we were having him meet with her so she could see how was the best way to teach him and which school would be best for him, ie. which school taught the way he learns. And he already knows he is VERY smart...

Anyways, funny moment, he finshed 4 days of testing with the neuropsych, lovely woman who he liked on sight. He looked right at her and said "Well? Which school am I going to?!"

Sara

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2006
Thu, 07-06-2006 - 12:12am
So, an update. I told ds he was going for a check-up, he said, "Great, I love check-ups." 8O I didn't say talking doctor because he's a gp and the ped did check his reflexes etc last time so I didn't know if it would be more than talking. Okay, so I talked with the doctor and then because he had seen ds before, he didn't need to talk with him. The kid was being so patient and was actually looking forward to his check-up. Gahhh. :) We went to the beach after the appointment, I was so exhausted from the stress and worry, we all needed to chill and so did everyone else. I'll post about the appointment in a seperate post.