How to talk to your child about autism?

Avatar for lstrebler
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Registered: 03-26-2003
How to talk to your child about autism?
4
Mon, 04-16-2007 - 4:01pm

Hi, I've lurked here for a while and have gotten so much information and support from you all!

My son is 7.5 and was diagnosed with PDD-NOS at 3. He is in a special class at school for high-functioning autistic kids. They transition to an NT class when they are ready... this is his second year in the program and will most likely be in it again next year.

So far, I have not talked to him about autism. He realizes that he gets special services, but at this point it doesn't register that other kids don't get the same treatment that he does. Anyone have thoughts on how/when to bring it up?

TIA,
Laura

 

Avatar for littleroses
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Registered: 03-28-2003
Tue, 04-17-2007 - 2:29pm

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2003
Tue, 04-17-2007 - 4:01pm

I just came from a therapy appt with the kids' therapist. It was our initial appt to discuss what we wanted the therapists to work on first with the kids, and one of the things they told me would be first on their list was to talk to the kids about their diagnosis and what it means, not as a way to excuse behavior but as a way to help them understand what areas they need more help with. The therapist said she felt information was power. I agree. I've shared with my kids already, but the therapist will explain it better than I've done.

I've been pretty upfront about it all from the beginning, but my kids were also older when diagnosed which makes it easier to explain. I haven't explained all the nitty-gritty clinical stuff, but I've discussed generalities with them (brain operates differently which is why some things are hard {writing assignments at school for instance}, but which is also what helps them have such a great memory, be so smart, etc). I've compared it to being born deaf (they have a friend with deaf parents). It makes life a little harder, but that's why we're finding supports to help us learn how to address the challenges better. I've also pointed out their strengths. It's probably helped our family that we have 2 AS kids and 2 NT kids as well as 1 parent each with/without AS, so the kids can see that we all have strengths/weaknesses. NT ds has great physical coordination, but AS kids have great memory and academic skills.

We did check out from the library "The Blue Bottle Mystery" and it's sequel (I can't think of the title) which features an approx 8yo AS child. Ds enjoyed reading it, but I'm not sure how much he understood that the child is like him. You could read through it and see whether it might help your ds.

Avatar for lstrebler
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 04-18-2007 - 10:53am

Thanks, both of you, for the suggestions. I will look for that book at the library.

We have materials all over the house about autism, and DS is usually curious about everything. I've been waiting for him to ask "what is this?" but it hasn't come up yet. I guess I will wait for him to ask.

My nephew has cystic fibrosis and I remember him learning about "sixty five roses" when he was very small. He has always dealt it extremely well and at 24 lives a fairly normal life. I may talk to his mom and see what her thoughts are... obviously this is much less debilitating than CF, but she might have some insight on how to talk about it.

THanks again!
Laura

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2003
Wed, 04-18-2007 - 11:27am

I know I'm a little late in responding, but I have a suggestion for you.

My son is 9 and is Dx'd with Aspergers. He's known about his Dx for quite a while, and understands that autism is never an excuse. That is the philosphy we've always lived by, and it's worked quite well for our family.

I would encourage you to check out the book, "All Cats Have Aspergers Syndrome". It's by Kathy Hoopmann (sp?), the same author who wrote "The Blue Bottle Mystery", "Lisa and The Lacemaker" and "Of Mice And Aliens" (I think those are the correct titles, I might be off by a couple of words.)

"All Cats..." is fantastic. My son took it to school and read it to his class, and they loved it. In fact, his teacher shared it with all of the other teachers and it spent several weeks getting passed around. It's simple, it's cute...and it's very easy for children to relate to/understand.

Good Luck~

Amy

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