I have such a headache!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2004
I have such a headache!
3
Mon, 09-05-2005 - 7:11pm

I thought once school started Nathan would be back to school routine.....and things would get back to normal (well, what we call normal!) It just hasn't happened yet!

He's been so difficult the last couple of days. And then today, we went to get some groceries. We barely made it thru. As soon as we got in the door....it started!! I know it's probably because he just started school last week, and now he's home for 3 days. But I'm so drained today! I have to keep breaking up arguements between the boys!!! He won't leave Tyler alone...verbablly or physically!!! Tyler even brokedown yesterday, because of Nathan's tantrums. Poor Tyler hit some button on the remote while Nathan was watching a dvd. Ty couldn't figure out what he pushed, let alone figure out how to make the movie continue. Nathan was screaming at the top of his lungs...running after Ty. He was just all over the place. The minute I fixed it....silence. Nathan sat down quietly, tears stopped. HE was fine now. He said, "ok, ok.....you can go now."

That's when Tyler lost it. I felt so terrible. I know how exhausting Nathan can be. He's still lining everything up, and he even WATCHES the door when we go out or in!! "you're gonna let the bugs in!! Close the door!" He's started messing with the light switches too. He never did that before. He stops when I tell him to, but it's just so annoying that he's doing all these things. Everything has to be "just so".....more than usual. I can handle the little quirks.....but GOD!!! He's just been taking everything a bit over the edge lately!!

Sorry, just taking a moment to vent!! And after dinner, I still have to sit down and read with him!! Another fun tantruming moment to enjoy!! Gotta go...he screaming AGAIN!!!

Michelle

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Registered: 06-25-2003
Mon, 09-05-2005 - 8:46pm

Michelle,

Hugs to both you and Tyler! I feel so bad for Ty (BTDT with the remote!), OK. I feel bad for you too, but you're not 7yo! He sounds like such a good and caring brother and these transitions must be as tough on him, in his own way, as they are on Nathan.

I'm sure now that Labor Day is over, you will all get back into the school rouine very soon and things will settle down. I am kimn of glad that our school doesn't start until after the long weekend. I think Peter would have trouble with the start-stop thing as well.

Maybe you and Ty can sneak some Mom and son time together soon -just the two of you. I think it would do both of you some good.

Do sensory inteventions help Nathan when he gets wound up like that? They help Peter, and I have often thought that our boys are similar in many ways. Deep pressure activities are best for us. I make Peter into food -I make Peterburgers with the big sofa cushions (squishing himn gently as I "eat" him) or Peterburritos -wrapped tightly in a blanket. It might be worth a try!

-Paula

-Paula

visit my blog at www.onesickmother.com
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Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 09-05-2005 - 11:22pm

Good idea on the sensory stuff Paula. I understand Michelle, that is tough. I hate days like that. The other day Mike pulled David's hair because Dave had erased a game by mistake and has been screaming at him non-stop. I have beefed up the sensory and the behavior program. I am back to zero tolerance on that stuff. That usually helps Mike because he needs a very very clear understanding of what is ok and what isn't. Just telling him it isn't doesn't do the trick. Plus he needs to be made aware of when he is shouting or getting out of hand.

Zero tolerance means that every instance of shouting is an instant 5 minute timeout (with timer is the only way it works). Every aggression is 30 minutes in his room and 4 hours of no electronics. Takes a couple times then he stops. I do use positives for helping too.

He was really weird in the store for me. I took just him with me and he had to push the cart. He would go really slow then push it fast and nearly crash something. When I asked him to stop he just was not there with me if you KWIM. That was just one little example but he was definitely "out there". Hopefully they get back into the swing of things soon.

Renee

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Registered: 02-24-2004
Tue, 09-06-2005 - 2:37pm

Well, unfortunately, when Nathan acts up like this....he doesn't want any type of touching! I find that odd especially since it looks as though he's "seeking" touch with Tyler. I have been doing the "time out" thing with him though. He usually behaves for a bit after that...but then we're right back where we started!! I've had to do alot of talking with him about good behavior and what's not acceptable. Sometimes he hears me and sometimes he doesn't. So I have been having him repeat things back to me...just so that I know he heard me. He never used to be able to do this, but it's working more and more now. I think now that he's getting older, disciplining him is becoming more challenging. Again, it's always hard to tell if he's having sensory problems or he's just being 6!! LOL

He was still acting a bit odd when I dropped him off at school this morning. I had to walk him to his class door, he usually does this by himself. AND he made me stay until the bell rang. Actually, he did let me go, then came running after me telling me that he needed to tell me something. "Mosquitos bite you, and then it itches!) He learned this "phrase" in school last week. I've heard it all weekend! So, I asked him if he wanted me to stay and he said yes. I did inform his aid of his "active" weekend...just to give her a heads up. Thankfully, I haven't gotten a call from the school!!