I love You

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-26-2005
I love You
8
Sat, 12-03-2005 - 12:26am
This may sound like a silly question but at what age did your child tell you verbally "I Love You"? Jake says it in response to my I Love you but has never come up to me and just said it on his own. Maybe I'm just being selfish because he is a very affectionate child and I know he loves me but it would be nice to hear it just once.
Teresa
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2003
In reply to: baboig
Sat, 12-03-2005 - 12:26pm

Teresa,

I love you too. OH! I thought you were just raising the level of the board..

Peter is 7.5 and he said it three times in his life. The first time he was out of it on drugs, so I don't really count that. One time was around Christmas, when he was full of Christmas cheer, and one time was when I had a chat with him about a big-ticket item which the neighbours had and we were saving up for (he came downstairs afte me, stood in the doorway, stuttered out "I- I- I love you" and *scarpered* lol!).

He doesn't even reciprocate when I tell him "I love you". He either doesn't respond or he says "I know". Sorry, but you may have to wait for those rare occaisions when he just feels like saying it.

He does love you, but I know it is very hard not to hear it.

-Paula

-Paula

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2004
In reply to: baboig
Sat, 12-03-2005 - 6:14pm

Dear Teresa,

And my 8 year old says it all the time, out of the blue, sometimes a little LOUD, throws his arms around me, gives me kiss attacks that don't stop --- sometimes in a slightly-crazed overcompulsive, wound-up-toy sorta weird way that just gets a little embarrasing, yes, sometimes I am embarrassed by my goopy over-sentimental kid. I am pretty sure I have even blushed.

He really started saying and meaning it at about 5 years of age. It still makes me all warm and gooey inside even when he's being weird, and old ladies on buses and subways just get all googly-eyed and smiley...

Well, you know, every kid on spectrum is just super unique, bless them all.

yours,

Sara
ilovemalcolm

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2004
In reply to: baboig
Sat, 12-03-2005 - 7:05pm

Nathan says this all the time too. I can't even tell you how many times a day he says this!!! I can't even remember the first time he said it......because he doesn't stop saying it!!!!! LOL

And I HAVE to say it back or he gets very upset! And as soon as he thinks I'm mad.....he says, "you don't love me!!" Everything circles around these words!

I'm very affectionate...physically and verbally with the boys, so dh always says I'm to blame for their "need" to shower me with their love!!! LOL I'm soooo sure!!!

Although, we do have "scheduled" cuddle time right before bed, and right before school. And they have to kiss my face uncontrollably before they leave me, lots of BIG, MASSIVE hugs too.....hhmmmm, maybe dh has a point?

Like I'm going to stop!!!!

michelle

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
In reply to: baboig
Sat, 12-03-2005 - 7:22pm

Sylvia is almost 4, and she says "I love you all the time," but I don't know that she "means" it or really knows what she's saying. She says it in response to me, and she says it as part of her bedtime routine but I really think it's a learned phrase with her, and not something particularly meaningful.

I will say, though, that until around 6 months ago she was not what you'd call affectionate. I mean, I was very aware of how much she loved me, but she didn't express it at all. She tolerated my hugs, and when she hurt herself if I tried to comfort her she pushed me away. Around 3 months ago she fell down and for the very first time she ran to me to get a hug, and I nearly burst into tears. Recently she's been VERY cuddly, VERY affectionate, wanting lots of close physical contact, so I'm thinking that maybe eventually she'll "get" what it means to say "I love you." (At least, I hope so!!!)

Jennifer

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-2004
In reply to: baboig
Sat, 12-03-2005 - 9:39pm
Great question! My son was repeating it after I said until about a month ago. He is 3.5. It got so funny though... because I would say :I love you". Then ask him, "what do you say"? He would say "thank you" it was so cute! He still won't initiate it and say it on his own.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: baboig
Sat, 12-03-2005 - 10:58pm

Ok, I haven't responded to this post because it is making me crazy. I don't remember when the first time was they said "I love you". I know it was later and it goes in phases, but I don't remember exactly when. I have to say, when they were really little I justified most of that kind of stuff with "kids that little don't do that anyway". For that I would have said developmentally they were still egocentric, etc. lol.

Cait has never been big on saying it. Will repeat it if I say it but I don't remember a time when she ever spontaneously said it. Now that she is nearly a teen I guess I am out of luck cause NO kid her age says it spontaneously, LOL. Ask any parent of a teen or preteen.

Mike does say it, not terribly often but he will. Most often after he has had a big meltdown and feels horrible or if something really great has happened.

Best thing in the world happened the other day that was similar. I was at school to pick up Dave. Someitmes I see Mike there at lunch. Usually I have to go over and say hi and it took weeks before he would respond. I was in the wrong place don't ya know. Well, last week he came running up behind me and said "HI MOM" with a big smile and gave me a big hug! (He is a backwards hug guy usually) Funny, I tried telling DH and the teachers about that and they just didn't get why I was so excited.

Renee

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
In reply to: baboig
Sun, 12-04-2005 - 3:11am

David just turned 8. He's dx with Asperger's, although lately it's hardly noticeable, at least to me. I never gave it much thought before, but I don't think he has *ever* said, "I love you." If he says anything in response to my "I love you" it's, "Yeah, I know." LOL!

Still, there is no doubt that he loves me. He is affectionate in other ways, and I figure he just doesn't see any need to state the obvious. He's the kind of kid who likes to save his breath for important stuff like what kind of ice-blaster Keepoku Nuba uses, or something like that. Occasionally I'll say, "I love you" too many times, and he'll say, "Yeah, I know. You only told me ten times in the last minute."

Evelyn

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: baboig
Sun, 12-04-2005 - 4:05pm

Hi Teresa,


Good question.