just need some reassurance

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-29-2005
just need some reassurance
4
Mon, 03-20-2006 - 7:05pm
So we moved here to NC thinking that the schools would be better and my DS who has Aspergers would get the services he needs. It's only been 3 weeks and today was his first visit to the principal's office. Ugh! apparently some kids were throwing pencils at him during a presentation he was doing so he flipped them the bird. He has some language problems and likes to swear when he's suprised or angry. I gave them all a heads up about this and the fact that he doesn't tolerate bullies well at all. He is such an easy target and he was really hoping going to a new school would give him a fresh start and it's happening again. I feel so bad for him. So he needs to spend the next 3 days eating lunch in the office and he's fine with it, but it upsets me as he was so excited to have a "fresh start". He's in the 6th grade and is 11. tough age! on the plus side he has made friends and was invited over to one of his friends house for a sleep over this past weekend and it went great. I am contacting the NC Autism Society to see if I can get an advocate to come with me to his IEP meeting. they finally set a date for that! If anyone has a pre-teen or teen aspergers child with any advice I would really appreciate it. Thanks for listening and letting me vent :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 03-20-2006 - 8:13pm

ARGH!

What are the kids who were throwing pencils getting? Did they lose 3 lunches too. Did they get suspended like they should.

I would definitely give the school a piece of my mind over that one. The only reason your son had a behavior problem is because other children were allowed to bully him and because his disability doesn't allow him to problem solve in situations like this.

I am frustrated for you.

Renee

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2004
Tue, 03-21-2006 - 5:44am

Hi there. Isn't he still on IEP from his previous school? I believe they need to honor his previous one until they set up their own.

I agree with Renee here. If I were you, I would really bug the school for emergency measures, as what they are doing is really borderline abusive, considering his disability!

BTW, at his age, flipping the bird and ending up in principal's office for 3 days could very well enhance his "cool" quota and help him make friends anyways... So, that fresh start may not be so injured here, really.

Welcome to the boards. Let us know how things go. Advocate probably a good idea, esp. if he/she has worked with this school district before and can give you a head's up. Sadly, even in educationally progressive state, certain schools can still be schmucks when it comes to specia; ed. Hope this ISN'T the case for you at your new school.

Sara
ilovemalcolm

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-29-2005
Tue, 03-21-2006 - 6:28pm
well I got a hold of my son's teacher today and she told me that the 2 boys actually weren't throwing pencils at him they were rolling them off their arms and Nate "perceived" it as they were throwing them at him. She then preceded to tell me that these 2 boys are in the "academically gifted" program and have never been mean towards any child. Well when my child flipped them the bird they sure did laugh and think it was great that Nate got in trouble. Cant' tell me they weren't provoking him. I just feel like I am constantly defending him. He is also having a tough time with disorganization and forgets to bring home work and forgets to return stuff which is taking a big toll on his grades. If anyone has any suggestions on that? He refused to disect a worm when they were working on "Worms Unit" he chose to sit in the hall, he couldn't stand the smell. I told her he has sensory issues but i'm not so sure they are getting it. well we have a meeting in April hopefully that will help. I just feel like things are going great for a while and then the other shoe drops. He will have really good days and is great at home anyway, it's just school unfortunately. I wish I could home school him! thanks for letting me vent once again! Renee...your son looks just like mine! it's kinda freaky!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2003
Wed, 03-22-2006 - 7:04am

What is in his current IEP (from his old school)? It sounds like he doesn't have the appropriate supports. My son, 5th grade, has an aide and goals in his IEP for organization and independence. He also recieves OT at school to help with self regulation and sensory stuff. Maybe you need to head over to the IEP board and get some help from Steph. She's wonderful.

Samantha

Samantha