Life after middle school

We are just entering middle school here. Graham started 6th grade this year.

Academically, he's making out fine. Honestly, I think he finds some of the work more engaging than his elementary worksheets as the teachers are giving more project based work now. We've had an IEP for him since kindy and we're in a triennial year which is good since it's an entirely new team who don't really know him yet. If anything, they've been handling him with kid gloves and I think they could push him a bit more.

Socially, the adjustment to middle school has been a bit rougher. His anxiety level is high and his stims have been very active. He is getting some teasing for being so emotionally reactive and he's gotten into some trouble with other students and teachers - the problems have been dealt with in a fair way, I think. He's actually shown some signs of maturing recently, he's not nearly as fragile as he once was and is showing some signs of wanting some independence. But it is a stressful environment and he needs some extra support, which he is getting.

The recent maturing has given me some hope that he will continue to mature, albeit more slowly than his peers. We judge him to be about 2-3 years behind emotionally and socially, with the added challenge of the mind-blindness that comes with the diagnosis. Things are looking fairly good, I think. And I have hopes that he can have a semi-independent future.

So that's our experience so far this year.

My AS ds did great in middle school last year as a 6th grader. He had some really great teachers and a wonderful school psychologist who organized a really nice social club disguised as a game club. Ds got good grades and teachers were happy with him.

Ds was mistreated by a few kids, but ds wasn't always aware that they were being mean to him, so he didn't find it a miserable experience even though he was a bit confused by it.

This year in 7th grade ds seems to be struggling a bit more. He's gone from all A's to having E's in a couple of his classes, primarily from disorganization. Usually ds is fairly compliant about going to school and has even liked going to school. This year he's not enjoying it as much.

I'm not aware of any specific conflicts ds is having. I think it's just that school's getting more challenging and he's getting more hormonal. My NT ds was a bit more moody in 7th grade, too.

Thankfully ds is able to continue in the social/game club that he was in last year. They have lunch together once a week and meet after school once a week. It's given ds some friends, so he doesn't feel completely alone. Ds teachers tell me that ds is in classes with a generally good group of kids who get along.

One thing that I really appreciated about middle school was that each grade level was kept separate from the other grade levels. The 6th graders went to class, PE and lunch, only with 6th graders. Each grade also met in classes in their own grade's wing of the school building, so the different ages/grades really didn't co-mingle. I think that was helpful for making the transition less challenging.

Our most difficult school experience so far has been the high school transition for AS dd. It was not pleasant at all. There are so many more kids -- and so many more losers who find great pleasure in tormenting weak kids. Dd had a horrific freshman year of school. She's a junior this year and doing a bit better, but it's still not a great experience.