Moms of 1st graders or older....

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Moms of 1st graders or older....
5
Thu, 09-14-2006 - 12:49am

Hey, I haven't been around in a while. Johnathan just started kindergarten this year and is doing great. We decided to put him in an alternative kindergarten this year, and our school district decided to try something new this year and created an alternative classroom that has an emphasis on autism. Johnathan is in this class and he is doing well.

I have a question for you all, and especially for those of kids 1st grade or older. We are getting ready to buy a home. We looked at one tonight that we really like. The only hang up I have is that it isn't the same school district that we're in now (we are close enough though, that we will see about having Johnathan stay put for this year. As far as we're concerned, school is a done deal this year, and he's settled). But my MIL teaches in the new school district, and she says she hasn't been pleased with the resources available to kids with special needs. She feels Johnathan would be better off to stay in the school district we are now in. Next year, he will most likely be put in a regular 1st grade classroom. That's what the alt kindy is for is to transition them into that type of setting. I want him to attend the neighborhood school with the neighborhood kids. So, what I want to know is, is your child attending a regular ed classroom? If so, what sort of extra services is your child receiving? Are you happy with the services your child is receiving? Is there anything you would add or change? I want to talk to the person who is over special needs in both districts to see how either one will help my son. This is going to play a huge role in whether we accept this house or not. We are already in love with the house. I just want to know that the school won't screw with my kid. If we aren't happy with how the new school district will do things I am willing to look elsewhere. Also if we aren't happy with either school district, a charter school for kids with high functioning autism is due to open up when Johnathan starts 2nd grade and I plan on getting him on the lottery list just in case, so if we aren't satisfied we can get him in there. But those are my questions? Is your child in regular ed? What type of special services is s/he receiving? Are you happy with those services? Is there anything you would add or change?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2003
Thu, 09-14-2006 - 9:15am

Both of my spectrum kiddos are in regular ed classrooms...and I wouldn't have it any other way. My youngest (1st grade) child was in a special ed. pre-K program and I felt it did it her more harm than good. While the teacher was amazing, I sincerely believe she was learning even more inappropriate behaviors because she was modeling her special needs classmates. I also believe that her language skills were repressed because the other kids in her class had even greater communication problems than she did. Therefore, I'm a HUGE proponent of mainstreaming whenever it is feasible. (NOTE: PLEASE DON'T BASH ME FOR THIS BELIEF, I KNOW THAT IN SOME CASES SELF-CONTAINED SPEC. ED. CLASSROOMS ARE THE ONLY OPTION FOR AUTISTIC CHILDREN.)

Both of my spectrum kiddos also receive services. Both receive speech and "resource instruction", and my youngest also receive OT and PT. Am I happy with the services? For the most part, I guess so. But...

We are living in one of the WORST school districts in the entire state. We bought the house we're in now because we loved it and believed that the school district couldn't be "that bad" since all of the surrounding communities have decent school districts. We could not have been more wrong. In retrospect, I would do ANYTHING POSSIBLE to move into the best district you can. Not just for your special needs child, but for ALL of your children. In fact, we'll be moving ASAP (can't do it right now financially) in order to get out of this district.

If you do end up in a situation where your special needs child is placed in a regular ed. classroom, be prepared to work three times as hard as when they were in a special ed. classroom, or an autism specific classroom. In general, regular ed. teachers aren't equipped with the autism expertise (shoot-many spec. ed. teachers are clueless about autism), and will need to have their hand held by you to ensure the success of the child. It is possible, but it's not always easy.

Finally, I must say that while I personally would NEVER listen to my MIL about anything related to our children, I'd pay attention to what yours is saying right now. Whenever an educator says, "don't come to my district" or when they live outside of the district they teach in for the sake of their own children's education, it speaks volumes.

Just two cents from somebody who made a VERY BAD decision when putting the house we loved in front of our children's education.

Good Luck!

Amy

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Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 09-14-2006 - 9:36am

We have had a mix of special education classrooms and mainstreaming.

First I will say I am with Amy in that I am a huge proponent of inclusion. However, I will also say that inclusion didn't always work out. It should in theory but then you put real people into it and some of them mess it up. It is very hard to find a mainstream teacher who really gets it as well as a school that really gets it and are willing to put forth the effort. It does take a whole lot more work to make it successful.

In my oldest dd's case we actually went to mediation to obtain inclusion for her. Would have went to due process too but the district saw the light, lol. Cait has been included since then and it has been the right choice for her until now (7th grade). Not that there haven't been struggles, there have been tons, but overall it was definitely the right decision for her.

Unfortunately she is now in a full inclusion day class program set up just for ASD kids and they don't get it. This is the first time EVER she is in something like an SDC but she is fully included for all academics. Our only other resource for educating her effectively is a special needs school. The only reason I haven't pulled her out of the current program yet is that I want her included with typical peers but it is looking more and more like it isn't going to work out.

I also have a son in special education. He was included up until 3rd grade. Unfortunately he could just not handle typical classrooms with all the movement, stresses, etc and he fell apart despite a supportive environment. We put him in SDC in 3rd grade where he has been since. In 4th grade he mainstreamed for 1-2 hours per day and this year he is included in regular 5th grade about 1/2 the day.

Inclusion for Mike has been alot of work but he has an awesome team. He has his SDC teacher still who oversees everything, he has a 1:1 aide, he has an autism co-teacher who consults with them, OT consult (that will increase this year I can tell you), Speech for conversational skills, and I am working on getting him assistive tech and music therapy.

However, he too goes to middle school next year and will likely need to go to the special education school. Only because there are no other options. The only option for HFA/AS kids in middle school is the program Cait is in. It is touted as this great thing because none of the other local districts around here have one. However, you can set up a program and call it whatever the heck you want, but it takes the people in the program and the school to make it work.

Renee

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Registered: 03-28-2003
Thu, 09-14-2006 - 10:45am

My dd is in 3rd grade. She has had a personal aide since kindy and is in a regular classroom. She used to get some OT services, but she was able to accomplish some goals like how to button buttons, zip zippers, her hands stopped trembling after time, etc. She does get some PT. Our school district takes them to the community pool every Friday for swim lessons. She gets some time per week with special PT attention. She also gets speech twice a week. In the summer, she the district pays for her to go to a summer program that emphasizes community activities (social emphasis) and adventures. They go horseback riding, rafting, bike riding, to the beach, rock climbing,etc. Every day is a new adventure planned. They also have them take swim lessons twice a week in this program and some minor academic goals. They have their own "aides" in this summer program. We were lucky to get this summer program, since this isn't a typical summer program found in other districts in the state.

I do wonder sometimes if she would be better off and get more attention if she was not in with the regular kids. On the outset, she doesn't appear to notice their social workings anyway. However, she has a habit of burping loudly and freely (no matter how many times i try to tell her). I asked her if she does this at school. She said no. I asked why she would not burp loud at school and she replied "because the kids would laugh at you." So I think some of it is osmosis-ing in there. I do like the fact that the kids in the regular ed have known her since she was in kindy and are protective of her. Something that may not have happened if she was cordoned off from them. She is still little though so heading into the older grades might have me feeling differently. My oldest dd is even worred about her little sister. She says the big kids (at the older schools) are mean.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2003
Thu, 09-14-2006 - 10:55am

Jayme,


Ohhh hohoho...


This is a big topic for me. Have you got all day?


We bought a beat-up little old house near a main road and a commercial building. We moved here for the school district. At the time, the draw was the regular ed record (98% of students go on to 4 yr college), but we also stay for the Special Ed, as my 3rd grader is in a special ed class in his home school (we lucked out on that one!).


I have a first-grader in regular ed with supports;

-Paula

visit my blog at www.onesickmother.com
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Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 09-14-2006 - 12:48pm
See, this is exactly what kept me up all night last night. This house is so nice. It's older -- about 47 years old, but has been taken care of very well. The yard is beautiful. The kitchen could stand to be updated, but has nothing that would need to be fixed immediately. The back yard is huge, has a sand pit for the kids, a spot for a vegetable garden, and has a huge tree that could hold a tire swing for Johnathan (he loves the one that my parents have hanging from their cherry tree), it's wonderful! But it's in this school district. And honestly, I don't liket this school district for regular ed kids, let alone special ed. This school district has a lot of inner city kids with inner city problems. This particular neighborhood doesn't have creepy, rough feel that a lot of them in this school district do, but we will still find the problem at school. It's also a smaller school district and doesn't recieve the funding that the district we live in now does. The district we live in now is in no way perfect, but it's much better, imo, as well as my MIL's opinion, and has bent over backwards to do anything possible to help my son. And it's had a huge impact! For preschool, Johnathan attended early intervention, and they were all kinds of special needs, not just autism. His teacher and aids were fantastic, and within 3 weeks of beginning preschool two years ago, Johnathan had gone from having at least one accident a day and still wearing diapers for naptime, to being fully day trained including naps. A month later, he was much more mature and hardly the same kid! And that summer we night trained him in one week. In two weeks since Johnathan started kindergarten, I've noticed a lot more maturity in him. He's trying to be more independant. Is behaving responsibly, and doing things that a typical 5 year old would do, instead of playing more on his 2 1/2 year old brother's level. The other day I caught him jumping off a piece of furniture that was about 3 feet high or so. This is not normal Johnathan behavior. He shouldn't have done it. I don't allow things like that. But I had a hard time scolding him because it felt so good to see him doing something that a typical 5 year old would do. Also, right now we are living with my inlaws (why we are trying to find a new house -- because they are driving us crazy!). We don't live in the district that my MIL teaches in, and she has a 15 year old son still at home. My dh and his sister both went to school in this district as well. MIL, as much as she enjoys her job, has always agreed with me when I said I don't want my kids in her district. I found out today that they may not let us cross district boundaries even for this year. If this is true, we will not be taking this house. My dh and I both feel that the program he's in this year is perfect for him and we don't want him moved. I've got a lot to think about. I'm trying to get in to see some townhouses in the area. Hopefully we can find something like that.
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