my 2yo dd kicked out of daycare for PDD
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| Thu, 09-29-2005 - 9:37am |
Hi everyone, I am new to the board & have been reading all the posts & love how supportive everyone is of each other. I started lurking around here about a month ago when my poor girl was kicked out of a daycare she was in for a few weeks because they said she has developmental problems & they could not handle her.
They wrote a letter stating how she does not make eye contact, cannot follow simple directions, has long crying bouts followed by excessive laughter, cannot focus, does not respond to her name, flaps her arms when excited, prefers to play be herself, eats crayons /does not play correctly with toys, & told us to get an evaluation. When we did, they would not give an official diagnosis (told me to see a neurologist) but I get the feeling they tried to tell me it was PDD - NOS.
It is really, really heartbreaking to find out that something is wrong with your daughter & that she'll need special therapy & to attend special education classes in school. It hit us like a ton of bricks, I had no idea. Sitters always had trouble with her & stuff but I had always thought she was just a bit "wild" and independent (supposedly I was very much myself as a toddler) - & since she is big for her age (40 lbs, 40 inches at 2 yrs 6 months) I figured that made it more difficult to control her & people expected more from her because she looks like a 5yo. I have an 8 yo son as well & never had any problems like this, and me & my husband don't have any history of it or anything (but then again back then they wouldn't have realized it.)
You go through this whole blame thing - is it me is it him what did I do wrong did I let her watch too much TV was I also PDD or autistic as a kid & no one realized it did I not interact with her enough did I do something while I was pregnant & so on...for weeks I cried & thought about nothing else, I have finally accepted it but I am still angry at the daycare even though they probably did me a favor in the long run because the early intervention will help. Still when your kid is kicked out of a school it really hurts, because you feel your baby is being rejected.
So anyway now we are going to start having therapists come in & work with her - the EI people have been great. I transferred her to another daycare & am petrified they are going to kick her out next. Unfortunately I have to work 4 long days a week, I'd like to quit but there is no way we could afford it.
So that is my story - I am so glad to finally "join" the group instead of lurking - please be patient with my responses they don't let me post at work but I'll definitely be reading & very grateful for any feedback.

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let me answer some of your questions and tell soem of my story:
Peter started to get help at around 27 months old. (we are in NYS) He recieved a SpecEd teacher (called a SEIT round these parts) at home 2 times a week and speech therapy one time per week at home and one time per week in a daycare center.
The speech therapist saw him in the daycare center and recommended we pull him out of there into a smaller environment. She was treating a little girl in H&I's house, and recommended I speak with H&I (husband & wife). I did, and loved them on sight. We went on a waiting list for a placement with them, and got in in the nick of time -our old daycare kicked us out. One week later, H&I gave us a month's notice. However two weeks later, Peter had improved soo much in their home environment that they met with us and told us they would work with him. (that was a VERY traumatic month -I had to get emergency counseling)
At 3yo we started Peter in a special preschool for half days, bussed to & from H&I's house. Most kids at that age don't have a diagnosis, unless it is something glaringly obvious like Down's, CP, or severe autism. They group kids of similar functioning together -kids who are on roughly the same developmental level (and the same size). Different school do thing differently.
He did *OK*, but didn't progress very well. Also I knew his BIG issues was language. They would call me up all excited and say "We had a breakthough today. He pulled up sleeves!!" (me:) "That's great. Did he *speak*?". I fought to have him removed from there, but it was relatively late in the school year and there were no other SpEd placements available in the county.
The next spring, I personally visited out every special ed preschool in the county. I hand-picked his placement, found a program which pushed speech 5 hrs per day, and he finally started to really talk at 4¼. With language, his bahaviour improved dramatically.
He is now 7 and in 2nd. He has been in a self-contained special ed class in our school district and is doing great.
Now DD:
My DD started with H&I at 14 months. Around 20 months H&I mentioned she was 'off' -language delayed and ...off. I had noticed it too. She didn't qqualify for services from EI. At 3yo, she got speech and OT through the school district -on condition that I pay for a private preschool.
Now she has just started K, mainstreamed with an aide and other supports. She is doing well, so far.
I HTH.
Hugs to you. This is a very dfficult process.
-Paula
visit my blog at www.onesickmother.com
Hi!
Just wanted to welcome you to the board! I just recently got back on the board, been having computer problems!! I started posting on the board about 1 1/2 yrs ago, and everyone has been great!
I have 2 boys, and my youngest was dx'd HFA when he was in preschool. He's now in 1st grade with the help of an aid, and doing pretty well so far! We didn't have any problems like getting kicked out of school, but we had quite the opposite problem!! Everyone says he does fabulous at school.....but then he comes home and releases all his frustrations out on me!
His brother is 9 (as of last Mon!) and it's been real difficult for him. We take it day to day here, and do alot of talking and discussing. I have found that with the school system, you really have to be right in there, always checking up on things, making sure everythings going alright.
Best of luck with the new preschool, and hope the appt goes well too.
Michelle
Hi & Welcome!
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