Need some help about picky eating

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-16-2006
Need some help about picky eating
6
Tue, 09-11-2007 - 7:14am

Ok girls, I have been racking my brain for weeks about this one.

Adam has ALWAYS been a very very very picky eater. He has tummy issues since birth.
Since we started the Adderall his pickyness has been at a all time high. He basically won't eat unless I approach him.
He hardly will come to me and say "I'm hungry mommy".
Just so you know his gag reflex is aweful.........kid can puke on a dime.
We see psych doc every 6 weeks for RX refill and to see Adam and he gets weighed.

Bascially my DH is really PSYCO over Adam weight. He is a really skinny kid.
I stalk Adam every 2 hrs and make him eat somehting-----anything cause I feel so desperate.

He is 38 lbs and is 3ft 6in tall---tall for his age of 4. His ped doc is fine with his weight. He doesn't look malnurished or anything.

So my question is do I just pull him off the meds or do I just keep duking it out the way I've been.......honestly I could choke my DH with his nagging he gives me over Adam, he rides my back CONSTANTLY but that's a whole other post and chat nite.

So here in "A" world have any of your kiddies have eating issues?
Any words of encouragement for a mom really ready to just pull her hair out cause my son and DH are stomping on my last nerver.

thanks gals
nora

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-19-2005
Tue, 09-11-2007 - 9:11am

Hi Nora,

Yes, here in "A" world, many of us do have children with picky eater and food issues. Did you see Paula's "picky eater tips" thread a couple of days ago? She wrote this great little essay awhile back and if you scroll down I think you'll see it. We bump it up periodically. Lots of good ideas.

Note to Paula, I seriously think you should publish your tips! They are really the best thing I've read. I'd love to put them on my blog too, if you agree.

Lately I've been reading two books about picky eating. One is called "Just Take a Bite" by Lori Ernsperger and Tani Stegen-Hanson (Temple Grandin wrote the forward). This is probably my favorite. It looks at it from a sensory/OT approach and gives you sample case studies of different children. Then at the end it has a little program you can do to address the various issues.

To sum it up, they get into two sets of problems. One is whether your child is in the right environment so that they will be open to the ides of eating at all. Is the room quiet, are there other distractions, is their seat comfortable, are they calm or do they need do something physical first so they can focus (OT-ish stuff, like crab walks, wheel barrow walks, pushing carts around, jumping jacks, etc.) So the first part is making sure the environment is conducive to your child eating, and that they are ready to try to eat.

If your kids like rules and routines, make sure you eat at the same time, same place and use it to your advantage. If you can, use their obsessions as part of the equation. Maybe Thomas can take a bite of meat or use Thomas as a reward. If they even let a piece of meat sit on their plate for a minute (hey, baby steps) then Thomas gets ecstatic and says, "way to go, you're such a useful engine!" Something like that. You get the idea. Basically, whatever turns your kid on. If it works, it works! Nothing is too silly.

Second it deals with the stuff Paula talks about, getting them used to the textures, smells, colors of foods and there are lot so suggestions for gradually easing your child into things. I liked this book a lot. It's gradual approach to things is good, I think. Your hubby needs to understand this won't happen overnight.

The other book I've been reading is more one mom's story, a few tips, but mostly it just makes you feel better and that you are not alone. It's called "Can't Eat, won't eat" by Brenda Legge. She has a good sense of humor and it just makes you feel like you are not crazy and your kid is not an alien. She's British though so some of her vocab and the British food products are not familiar. But it's enjoyable to read.

I can't address the meds issue, but I am sure others here can. I know you said that your pediatrician is not concerned about your son's weight. Has she mentioned a multi-vitamin? That might give your husband a comfort level.

I'd really recommend Paula's thread and also the "Just take a bite" book.

Hang in there. I know it is frustrating.

HTH,
Katherine

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2001
Tue, 09-11-2007 - 9:48am
Bobby also has a senstiive gag reflex.

 


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Avatar for littleroses
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Tue, 09-11-2007 - 1:06pm

delete




Edited 2/19/2008 5:03 pm ET by littleroses
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2006
Tue, 09-11-2007 - 1:29pm

Hey Nora!


We had alot of eating issues with Nick when he was on the Adderall.

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Christine

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-26-2003
Tue, 09-11-2007 - 4:21pm

Oh, boy, I'LL say my kiddo has some picky eating! Major issue on my radar (even more so than it has always been) as now he's even scrutinizing the few foods he previously ate w/o issues. Pickiness in hindsight may've begun in infancy as I had to supplement my rapidly growing baby with formula and he simply would not drink out of anything but a Nuk Orthodontic *disposable* nipple. At the time, I first noticed it when in transitioning from stage 2 to stage 3 (with chunks) baby food, he gagged and threw up with anything with the non-uniform consistency. What fun! ;o)

The two books I can also recommend; "Can't Eat, Won't Eat" is very validating for us moms in the trenches. I actually had someone say to me back when, "he sure has you trained, doesn't he??!". Not helpful. Unfortunately, the other book hasn't helped me, I'm still short-order cheffing it which stinks and I am not at all happy with my son's nutrition. He's not on any meds at present (I need to delve into the archives and catch up, it's been a long time since I've been on this board), so the appetite is there, just not for many things I'd want him to eat. I insist on milk (we've worked our way to fat-free, but then again, he's 9); that's an improvement over his old 'only apple juice to drink' regimen. However, the entree section of his "likes" list is way too short: cold cereal, certain yogurts, Lebanon bologna (hey, at least it's beef and relatively lean), McDonald's hamburger plain w/ketchup, grilled hamburger at home as long as there's no black stuff on it and is a particular brand of burger patty, waffles and pancakes with only real maple syrup, peanut butter sandwich on squishy white bread, and pizza (and he's particular about that, too). I think that is it. No pasta, no real meat such as a piece of chicken, no grilled cheese (not that I should aspire to that), no soup, no eggs, you get the idea. The killer is absolutely not a single vegetable! He wouldn't even eat fruit if I didn't buy Gerber baby fruit (pureed). Desperate times call for desperate measures. Both his father and his paternal grandmother are picky picky picky and clearly have certain oral tactile issues of their own. I've actually seen my MIL shudder when served peas.

If it's calories and nutrients you want to add on, would he drink something like Carnation Instant Breakfast? I used to sell it as a "Mommy Milkshake" and both my kids would chug it down. I also used to make my own pizza (sadly, I'm actually feeling like I should go back to doing so) with wheat germ in the crust, pureed cooked carrots and silken tofu in the sauce. I'd add in the 'contaminants' until they were just below the "taste" threshold. Not bad, just a pain in the butt.

I'll be interested to see what other tips other moms may have for you!

-HB

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2003
Wed, 09-12-2007 - 10:02am

Nora,


I bumped up the picky eating thread. However that mostly deals with expanding your kids range of foods as opposed to just getting him to eat at all.

-Paula

visit my blog at www.onesickmother.com