new here, lots of questions (long)!

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-15-2003
new here, lots of questions (long)!
18
Fri, 01-11-2008 - 10:59am

I already posted this below, but everyone seems to be up here...

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-03-2006
Sat, 01-12-2008 - 3:51pm

Hello!


Powered by CGISpy.com 
 
 
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2007
Sat, 01-12-2008 - 5:49pm

I just wanted to chime in on your frustration with the teachers- I would be frustrated too - especially since it is an integrated preschool and they are trained in special needs. They should reinforce his social appropriate behavior of saying goodbye by responding. My son at 2.5 had 5 words including cracker. One day after EI the slp was so excited that he signed for cracker - hello - he can say cracker - can't they keep track of the 5 words that he had???? Shortly after that he transitioned to a 3-5 yr old program and I requested a change in location to get away from that team (I did hire an educational consultant to help me).

If your son is diagnosed as PDD or ASD he should have more available to him I would think. Have you talked with anyone in your area that has "been there, done that"? My ds's school services went from 2 hours a week at 2 yrs. old to 20 hours at 3 and 4 with the help of a consultant - at 5 years "tested out". New IEP at 8 of speech 2 times a week.

You may want to videotape him at school on the playground and review it with the team, your private OT or dev. ped. to get their input. That has worked better than me describing what I am concerned about.

You are a vigilant mom, which we all have to be, so I give you lots of kudos and pats on the back. Wistfully, we must keep it up because those darn nt peers keep progressing (that was kind of a joke!).

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2007
Sun, 01-13-2008 - 1:08pm

Hi!


iVillage Member
Registered: 12-15-2003
Sun, 01-13-2008 - 7:22pm

Tonia, does "I don't want to try" just mean he doesn't feel like doing what you're asking him to do? I meant to mention that about my son, too - that he was such the model child until maybe right before his 3rd birthday. For a while, I thought I was going to be exempt from the Terrible Twos! But he is making us pay for that complacency in full, and lately his favorite response to any request is, "No! I don't want to do that!" As exasperating as it is, I confess it used to creep me out a little bit that he was so docile when he was 2 - all the other moms in the ECFE class would complain about how spirited and rebellious their children were, and I'd always worry about my obedient boy. No worries on that front now!


I omitted one more unusual aspect of my son's behavior - whereas other kids get in all kinds of power struggles because they want so badly to be independent, my son doesn't like to do things for himself! He throws so many tantrums because we won't put his shoes on for him, or his pants, or brush his teeth, etc., all things he knows full well how to do. If we say, "Okay, we'll help you, but you have to do it yourself" - the minute we lend a hand to help, he just stops trying and waits for us to finish the task for him. I realize the new baby has probably exacerbated the situation (that whole thing with the older child wanting to be coddled as well), but he's always been like this - for example, before I was pregnant with #2, my son resisted using a spoon and fork for the longest time, preferring that we spoon feed him. As a result (or maybe as a cause? it's a chicken or egg type thing), his fine motor skills aren't as far along as his peers, and if you think about it, it's all about fine motor - putting on shoes, pulling up zippers, etc. Anyway, I'm wondering if anyone else's child has or had the same aversion to being independent?


Jennifer, thanks for all the great information. I ordered that book from Amazon immediately! And that floortime looks every interesting - have you started implementing any of those concepts, and if so, how much success have you had? For some reason, this whole time it never occurred to me that the silliness could be an aversion tactic on top of everything else, but my gosh, that makes sense. The first time I saw him doing it in public was last year in the ECSE playgroup, right before

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2007
Mon, 01-14-2008 - 2:29pm

Jooksing, you were describing my 5yo Justin when it comes to being totally dependent. Not until Justin was four, did he want to undress himself. He also wanted to be fed by us until he was three, and he was almost five when he started to put on his clothes or shoes independently. He still has a tough time with zippers and buttons on his jeans so he prefers to wear elastic-waist pants. I agree with you about the chicken or the egg thing. Is it because he didn't get enough practice with all these fine-motor activities he's so behind in that area, or is it because he had fine-motor skills deficits that he did not want to do any of these activities? It wasn't until he was 4.5 we conclusively decided that he was left-handed. He still prefers to eat with his hands rather than using utensils, and I have to really really encourage and praise him whenever he's using his utensils.

-- Innie

Lilypie 6th to 18th Ticker

Lilypie 3rd Birthday Ticker
Lilypie 6th to 18th Ticker Lilypie 3rd Birthday Ticker
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2007
Tue, 01-15-2008 - 4:19am

Hi again!


Just a quick note to chime in about self-help skills or lack thereof...


My ds would NOT feed himself w/ a spoon or fork until he was 3.5. He was content to use his hands (yum, appetising) until I became a squeaky wheel with his therapists. His OT tried to help, but it was actually his Special Instruction teacher who found success in discrete trial training (which makes sense since that is how he learned everything else from eye contact to pointing to colors and concepts such as "in" and "on")

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-15-2003
Tue, 01-15-2008 - 11:02am

I'm curious - what more could the state and school be doing? My son is attending a preschool in our school district right now. It's an integrated class with 8 special needs kids and 8 typical kids; there is one special ed teacher, one typical teacher, one speech therapist, and usually 3-4 paras for each class session. The class is free for us (ECSE pays the tuition for us), and meets 3 times a week for 2 1/2 hours. This is about it as far as what we're doing for my son (aside of course from

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2007
Tue, 01-15-2008 - 12:08pm

I am in New York State, so all I know is what we can get here, and I will tell you what I know, okay?


My 4.5 yo son, as part of the preschool program, attends an integrated classroom as well, that we do not have to pay out of pocket for. He goes M-F ; 8:10a - 1:10p. He receives ALL his services (at NO COST to us) there (PT, OT, Speech, Counseling, as well as the Special Instruction in the classroom setting). We had to have evaluations done to prove he needed those services (in addition to the dx from the dev. ped.), then the state/county/school district- (?whatever?)

Pages