newly diagnosised, lots of ?s

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2003
newly diagnosised, lots of ?s
Sun, 06-29-2003 - 11:25pm
Hi! My name is Danielle and my 5 yr old son was recently diagnosed with Asperger's. I've felt this roller coaster of emotions lately. I'm happy to know now why he is who he is, but its also really hard. Hunter is my second oldest, we have five kids. I feel so sad he is going to have to face this his whole life. He is a wonderful, loving little boy. I always knew he was different from other kids, but the doctors never saw it. They would just blow me off. Once he started school his differences really became evident. He had a great preschool teacher who was just really concerned. I brought up the concerns with our new pediatrician, he immediately said he was refering us to a nuerologist as he suspected PDD. Its amazing how quickly everything fell into place one someone took the time to listen to me.

I'm now really worried about school next year. He will be entering a regular kindergarden class. He likes to be around other kids, but they don't always like him, which breaks my heart. He is also prone to depression. His md referred me to a pychologist, but they didn't have any experience with AS, so I felt that wasn't the best choice. I really worry about putting him on meds for the depression, but I also want him to be able to function.

I don't mean to be a downer, I just have so many worries. I want to make the right choices and I want whats best for him. If any of you have any advice on entering school or how to deal with the depression, please feel free to share your advice/experiences with me. Thanks for listening.


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 06-30-2003 - 10:10am

I hate giving advice when I haven't even done what I am suggesting, but here it is anyway. If you are unsure of what the best thing is for your child, I suggest looking into getting a child educational consultant/advocate. I'd check first with any support groups in your area to get some referrals. You can also check with support groups online or do an online search for advocates. Sometimes it helps to have others fighting with you to get what your child needs. I did have someone available to come to my son's IEP but I was lucky in that the school is ready to provide what my son needs. Have you told the school about your son's needs and has he been tested by them? If not, thats where I would start. Call the school district and talk to the special or exceptional child education services. Tell them about your child and that you want him tested (I know your poor child may have already been through a battery of tests. My son was and I had to bribe him the whole way). That should get the ball rolling and having an advocate will help it keep rolling (if you know what I mean). Well, good luck with whatever you decide.



iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 07-01-2003 - 5:48am
Hi Danielle,

I know how you are feeling. My son is 4yrs old and I know he has Asperger's but he can't be diagnosed until he is at least 5. We are going this month to his pediatrician and she is going to give him medication to take for his anxiety. I feel scared and anxious that it will make him a totally different person. I have two older boys 13 and 12 and like you I knew he was different from day one. I am lucky because he has had a worker come to our home since he was 2. She has been a great help to us. She has made sure he gets all the care he needs. She is there with us at doctors appointments for support and to make sure the doctor is on top of everything. We put him in preschool and he has a special resource teacher that works with him. In Canada we have Junior kindergarten and senior kindergarten. I am keeping him in preschool instead of junior kindergarten because I feel he will get more one on one there. I dread the day he has to go to senior kindergarten because he just won't get the attention he will need. (One teacher for 25 kids!) I don't have any real advice because I am just learning to deal with things myself. But I can definately relate to what you are going through! You are doing the best you can do for your child. Keep up the good work and try not to get discouraged. ( I know it's hard not to!)



There are 4 things you cannot recover.
1. The Stone.......after the throw.
2. The Word........after it's said.
3. The Occasion......after it's loss.
4. The Time.........after it's gone.