Oh Man

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Oh Man
14
Fri, 05-26-2006 - 7:45pm

Had a horrible day today. Mike had a horrible tantrum at the music therapy screening and it was so bad I had to restrain him. I haven't had to do that in over 1 1/2 years. It feels like we are right back where we started from. That all the work is just poof gone.

It was so bad that I had to restrain him for 20 minutes and finally he said he wouldn't hit anymore and I took him to the car. I tried to talk to the lady for 2 minutes and he started kicking thier glass door so we left. Then he picked up a big (at least 6in diameter) rock from the landscaping and threw it at me. I was far enough away to get out of the way. BUT GEEZ! COMMON!

I am SOOOOOO mad at him still. I took him back to school. After school he said he was sorry and I couldn't forgive him yet. Never have had that. I told him I was angry still and we would talk later. Tonight I told him I felt like he hated me and wanted to be somewhere else. That I never EVER threw a rock at my parents. That I know of NOT A SINGLE CHILD who throws big rocks at thier parents and if he does anything like today again I will put him in the hospital and have them give him medicine to help him behave.

Needless to say he is banished from electronics until further notice. AT least the weekend, probably a week. NO trips out nothing. They were supposed to go to their grandparents tonight so DH and I could go to dinner. NOPE. GROUNDED.

SSSHHHHHH-------------------TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

I thought we were done with this! I called the psychiatrist whose name I have had for a while to get him in. Of course she isn't taking new patients so I had to beg on her voice mail. Of course she is on vaca until Tuesday. She takes a natural as well as medical approach so I want her, not another shrink. I emailed our psychologist in case he does this again I want someone who can referr for hospitalization. Hope she can.

Renee

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Avatar for littleroses
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
In reply to: rbear4
Fri, 05-26-2006 - 8:05pm

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2005
In reply to: rbear4
Fri, 05-26-2006 - 8:56pm

Hey Renee,


Been there done that!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: rbear4
Fri, 05-26-2006 - 9:08pm

When it rains, it pours. You sure have had your share of difficulties lately. I'm so sorry to hear about Mike's regression in behavior and you missing out on your date. Hang in there Renee.

((HUGS))
Christie

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: rbear4
Fri, 05-26-2006 - 9:51pm

Thanks again gals.

Yea LR is was the first time at this one. He went for a few months before and then the other one moved. This was a new place. I explained to him in advance and he seemed ok. He was in a great mood all the way there. Then I goofed. They were running late and I got annoyed and said under my breath "I was supposed to have you back by 12". Well that is when he started. Between the new place, new therapist, and then my time anxiety he went ballistic. He was doing so well before I am usually really careful about saying things like that. But he was talking all about the Lord of the Rings book he got in the library the whole time. I don't think until that time he really checked into where we were and what time it was.

Then some other clients(2 adults) with a girl in a wheelchair came into the very small waiting room, plus the secretary and the therapist.

Regardless of why, the behavior was not ok. He is 10 now and has gone through more than a year without the behavior. I barely could restrain him because he is getting big and strong. I have rug burns on my ankles and he threw a large rock at me. The plan is that if he gets near that point again we will hospitalize him. For the tough love and to teach him the consequence if nothing else. He really has to learn that this is NOT ok and he has to control this or he will need medication and to be where it is safe. It is about killing me but I do know it would be the right decision at this point. He cannot go through life with this behavior and have a decent life.

I am spending my evening checking on my insurance coverages and bookmarking the local psychiatric hospitals and figuring out which ones are good so I am prepared if I have to do it.

Renee

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
In reply to: rbear4
Fri, 05-26-2006 - 10:05pm

((((Renee))))


I can only begin to imagine how you feel.

Follow me
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2003
In reply to: rbear4
Fri, 05-26-2006 - 11:52pm

Renee,

I am so, so sorry. My heart is just breaking for you on so many levels. You know how to get in touch with me 'outside' Please do so if you need to talk -or anything at all. It doesn't matter what time of day or night.

I wish I could offer more than support. I think you are doing all the right things. I just wish you didn't have to do them.

I know you feel that so much more than me.

Does Mike have any conception how wrong his behaviur was or is he sorry because you are exceptionally mad?

-Paula

-Paula

visit my blog at www.onesickmother.com
Avatar for betz67
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: rbear4
Sat, 05-27-2006 - 8:27am

((((HUGS)))) that all really stinks! I'm so sorry that he reacted like this again!!!!

You are doing the right thing by preparing yourself. I hope you don't have to do anything with the info, but better safe in this situation! the psychiatrist sounds great, hope the begging works!

Betsy

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-17-2003
In reply to: rbear4
Sat, 05-27-2006 - 8:32am

Renee,

BIG ((((HUGS))) - I've been there done that, still there doing that. I'm sorry that you are dealing with all of this again. Hopefully it will just be a one time thing and things will be smoother for you now.

Beverly

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: rbear4
Sat, 05-27-2006 - 9:24am

Thanks for the support Gals.

I am hoping it is a one time thing too. I definitely put the fear of god in him last night and he was very very remorseful. I was glad for the remorse adn it wasn't just becasue he was in trouble. I think he actually felt bad about what he did to me. He also had a very boring night while everyone else watched TV or what not. Friday is usually a free night to do whatever and there was also a brand new episode of one of his favorite shows on that he missed. So the consequence was there. If he does it again I will know he can't control it.

He had an episode at school Thursday as well but not to this extent. I may have already written about that but I don't recall. He had a few things going on, growling and such, then during music he kicked another boy (not too hard but made contact) and was given a timeout and citizenship report. I guess he was screaming at the teacher in timeout and it took most of the afternoon to calm him down.

It is the end of the school year and change is very very hard for him. 1/2 the kids he has been in class with for 2 years are moving on to middle school and leaving. He will be off for the summer and not have his daily routine. And we don't quite know what is going for next year yet completely and he knows the teacher for mainstreaming but hasn't seen her class. I think it is starting to freak him out. If we can just make it through the next 3 weeks it will be ok. Starting something new like Music therapy was just silly at this time but he had been doing so well I didn't expect him to blow like that.

Thanks again for support girls.

Renee

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2003
In reply to: rbear4
Sat, 05-27-2006 - 11:09am

((((Renee)))) I'm so sorry. I hope you can get in to the psychiatrist you want.

Samantha

Samantha

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