Hi Heather, We have two cats and my DS used to be really rough with them. Thank goodness the cats were pretty tolerant, but once he did get a bad scratch. What I used to do is to show him how to pet the cats gently. I took his hand, and then showed him to gently glide his hands from head to the tail side. I showed him how much pressure to put on. He has learned, and is pretty good with the cats now. Perhaps you can show him how to pet the dog, how much pressure to exert on the dog when he hugs her, etc and see if that helps. If he were like my PDD-NOS son, he probably doesn't know how much pressure to use as he may have proprioceptive issues.
We have two chihuahuas and a cat. My older chihuahua is very tolerant. She's a good mommy dog even though she's never had pups. She tends to "mother" Haley a lot by comforting her when she needs it, etc. She does have her limits though. My youngest chihuahua is very intolerant of anyone except me unfortunately so I have to watch her. And the cat is intolerant of anything more than simple petting.
Haley tends to get too rough with them sometimes and gets in their faces because she doesn't understand spacial needs. She's gotten a couple of minor bites and scratches out of it all but thankfully the dogs are gentle even when angry. I'm more worried that she'll hurt the dogs more than I am of them hurting her. She honestly thinks she is just playing with them and I really don't think she realizes that she's upsetting them when she gets rough. In her mind, they are playing with her... except they aren't.
I think teaching a child how to behave around an animal and how to treat it properly is the best thing to do. Punishing in this case really doesn't teach them anything and they aren't likely to have any idea why they're being punished.
In addition to what everyone else has said, I recently stumbled across some great books at the library about animals (we checked out dogs and cats since that's what we have). They're just basic beginner info about pets, written on a kid level. My 4yo NT dd was interested in them, so I read them with her, but they might be helpful educational tools for your little guy, too. Check with your library for what they have available.
we had to closely monitor interactions then when child got scratched we'd immediately show appropriate after so many times child figured out that just like him the pets had a right to tell you it hurt
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Hi Heather,
We have two cats and my DS used to be really rough with them. Thank goodness the cats were pretty tolerant, but once he did get a bad scratch. What I used to do is to show him how to pet the cats gently. I took his hand, and then showed him to gently glide his hands from head to the tail side. I showed him how much pressure to put on. He has learned, and is pretty good with the cats now. Perhaps you can show him how to pet the dog, how much pressure to exert on the dog when he hugs her, etc and see if that helps. If he were like my PDD-NOS son, he probably doesn't know how much pressure to use as he may have proprioceptive issues.
I hope this helps,
Innie
I agree that modeling appropriate pet "loving" is a good way to deal with this.
I agree with everyone here.
I completely agree with what others have said.
We have two chihuahuas and a cat. My older chihuahua is very tolerant. She's a good mommy dog even though she's never had pups. She tends to "mother" Haley a lot by comforting her when she needs it, etc. She does have her limits though. My youngest chihuahua is very intolerant of anyone except me unfortunately so I have to watch her. And the cat is intolerant of anything more than simple petting.
Haley tends to get too rough with them sometimes and gets in their faces because she doesn't understand spacial needs. She's gotten a couple of minor bites and scratches out of it all but thankfully the dogs are gentle even when angry. I'm more worried that she'll hurt the dogs more than I am of them hurting her. She honestly thinks she is just playing with them and I really don't think she realizes that she's upsetting them when she gets rough. In her mind, they are playing with her... except they aren't.
I think teaching a child how to behave around an animal and how to treat it properly is the best thing to do. Punishing in this case really doesn't teach them anything and they aren't likely to have any idea why they're being punished.
Mom to Erin (19) and Haley (10yo Aspie)
Mom to Erin (19) and Haley (10yo Asp
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Edited 2/19/2008 11:25 am ET by littleroses
Thank you for the advice.
Heather,
Just adding a thought to the sound advice you've already gotten, which was excellent IMHO.
Hi!
We also had to teach Nick about properly interacting with our pets.
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Christine
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