Please help, What are your thoughts...

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Registered: 11-10-2003
Please help, What are your thoughts...
5
Sun, 06-25-2006 - 4:02pm

My son will be 2yo in a couple weeks...and I have some questions to ask regarding his behaviors. Let me start by saying I work as a therapist with children with mental health problems, and work with many children that have Asperger's. I generally know what Asperger's looks like in children elementary age through adults. But I don't have experience working with toddlers with Aspergers. I had been analyzing my son on and off for about 8 months or so, and recently stopped thinking about it...only to have my friends tell me that he has traits of Aspergers. So now I am back to wondering.

Please if those of you have children that Aspergers could give me feedback on what your child was doing around 2, that would be very helpful. If you want to keep reading I will tell you a little about my son and what he has been doing.

Nathan started talking very early. He had about 100 words in his vocabulary by 13 months. Also around 13 months he would match letters with eachother from the fridge and carry them in pairs based on shapes. Like he matched Q & O, L & T, N & Z, M & W, H & K, P & D, V & Y and so on. By 15 months he knew all his letters, numbers, shapes, and many body parts. He knew all his colors a couple months later. He now can talk about almost anything and speaks mostly in 6 -9 word sentences. I am aware that he is very gifted, and thought that was just it. But I am also aware that many kids with Aspergers are gifted.

So here are his behaviors....As in infant he rarely napped at all. He always slept good at night. He was very sound sensitive and would cry when people were to loud, or around certain things like the vacuum or coffee grinder. He also would shake his head back and forth for some type of vestibular purpose it seemed. He loved to make himself "dizzy" (he still does this by shaking his head or spinning sometimes). He generally wasn't all that interested in people in a young age, but he has always been very easy to get to smile and laugh. He finds many many things funny. He is somewhat introverted, but not very shy around people (kind of like his daddy). He does speaks spontaneously about things all the time, but will say something over and over until you repeat what he says and then he stops. He likes to make a lot of vocalizations and sounds. Sometimes he will make a series or set number of sounds inbetween things he says, usually inbetween numbers or letters. Like he will say "A - uh uh uh - B - uh uh uh" He does other things like that too, like he will say a letter and then throw a ball, and then say another one and throw another one. He sees shapes and letters everywhere he goes. He will make shapes and letters with his food, or his arms, or other objects and name them. He often sees and notices things that we don't. He talks all the time and speaks very clearly, but talks strange. He uses inflection at odd times. And often makes a 2 syllable word a 4 syllable word because of how he kind of sings it. He isn't monotone at all, but still very odd. I wish I could describe it better. It kind of goes up and back down. This is weird, but he also has a very large head..which I've heard can be a symptom. Hmmm...he has no real fears, other than puppets that we do in a kids program at church. I think other puppets are okay though. He goes to bible class and enjoys it. He usually doesn't talk that much around the other kids, but his teacher said he talked a lot this week and participated well. He also has had this think 2 times in his life where he would stare blankly. he wouldn't respond when I called his name or anything. It didn't last long, but I was afraid it might have been a seizure. He is cuddly, but rarely comes to give or get a hug, and never comes to give a kiss. We are VERY affectionate with him and he likes it, but doesn't give it that much. He loves to cuddle at night and when he is sleepy. he often wants us to play with him, but plays great on his own too. he will take my hand and say "mommy play with me" but when I get in there plays by himself (which most kids this age do). He has no fixation on any certain thing. He likes doing almost anything. He does pretend lots. He pretends objects are other objects, or pretends he is talking on the phone. He always responds to his name and understands questions and responds appropriately when I ask him things. He has a sense of humor and likes to make "jokes" he thinks it is very funny when you change consonants around in words. Like if you said "tickory tickory tock instead of Hickory dickory dock"...he would think that was hilarious. He does talk to people he doesn't know well. He does watch what others are doing and asks about it. He wonders where people are when they aren't there. He transitions pretty easy and actually almost never tantrums at all. he is a very easy going kid.

so that's my Nathan in an nutshell. Please let me know what you think. Any feedback would be appreciated, and feel free to ask me any questions. Thanks so much if you made it this far. ; )

Michelle

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Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 06-25-2006 - 5:39pm

He sounds gifted, not AS, from what you said. But considering your background and the fact that autism and AS are highly publicized now I understand your concern and being careful. So many conscientious concerned parents will question it. I have with my typical as well as AS children. He may have some sensory issues but many gifted kids will as well as they are not exactly typical either.

AS is a disability and developmental delay, even though they may have many gifted traits in areas they are delayed in others. I didn't see that you have any concerns or that he has any delays. That is a wonderful thing.

My kids as toddlers at 2? I have to think back I have 2 AS kids and they are now 10 and 12.

My daughter didn't use the word momma or anything to refer to me until after 2. She knew all her colors and shapes but didn't fill me in on that until she was about 2 when I caught her labelling them, lol. About 16 months she used to repetitively show me the same things over and over and make me label them. They were letters and colors mainly. But she only had maybe 3 words at 18 months and maybe 20 at 2. Very few 2 word sentences and they all were echolalic and without meaning. She couldn't follow any directions at all and tantrumed frequently. Very very frequently for a very very long time. She had no play skills. She would carry objects in her hands as many as she could carry or she would line them up. That was about it. She was a day care a couple hours a week and she wouldn't interact with other children and she hid under the easel often. We went to a play group and she refused to join the group to play and usually wandered the perimeter and kept trying to run outside. She rarely slept until she was 5.

My son had more words than Cait but still wasn't terribly interactive and misunderstood alot. I know he had 2 word phrases and some sentences but looking back most were likely echolalic or rote. He tantrummed often and wandered off alot. He would wake from naps screaming unconsolable for hours. He didnt seem to really understand what we were saying but he did have language. He often appeared deaf but then would hear words like "ice cream". He slept like a charm until he was about 7 and hasnt slept well since. He had HORRIBLE stranger and separation anxiety and I couldn't leave him with sitters. Only my mom and one lady who had watched me when I was a child. It took along time to get him used to her as well.

They both liked to laugh and play with mom and dad but socially they were definitely delayed particualarly when around other kids.

HTH.

Renee

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Registered: 11-10-2003
Sun, 06-25-2006 - 7:56pm

Thanks Renee for your response. A really good friend of mine has two children with Autism and she has met Nathan a couple times (they live far away) and we talk. She is the one that recently talked with a supervisor in her daughter's program about Nathan and they said that what she said (probably less then I posted) sounded like he has some type of PDD, most likely AS. Also I think I forgot to mention that he repeats things sometimes until we acknowledge what he said by repeating it. Like he will say "there's a yellow ball" and if we just say "yes" that usually isn't enough. He will repeat until we say "yup there's a yellow ball" And then he stops. Occasionally he will stop if we just say yes...but not always. He doesn't repeat everything, just if he wants us to know something. It's really hard to assess a 2yo play with others, because generally they parallel play anyhow at that age. Nathan usually doesn't interact all that much with other kids. He generally ignores them. Although for the first time ever last week I saw him trying to interact with a girl. He didn't know how but I think he wanted her to chase him because he would run up to her and then run away and look over his shoulder at her. He did it a couple times. I was so happy because I had never even see him acknowledge other kids. Nathan doesn't have any delays that I am aware of. I would say social skills is his weakest area, but he does okay. People often treat him like he is so strange, like some sort of freak because of the things he does. And I am not going to go around telling everyone my son is gifted, I am just not that kind of mom. Thankfully most people who don't know us don't know his age so they think he is at least 3 because of his size. I know with the children I work with there are extreme varying degrees of AS, so I am not completely 100% sure, and that's okay. Time will tell. He will need some social skill interventions anyhow, just being gifted.

Also thanks for sharing some information about your son and daughter. How are they doing now? I'm sure remember them at 2yo seems like forever ago. I barely remember when Nathan was born 2 years ago. Well, maybe that's an exageration, but still it seems like long ago. Anyhow thanks again for your response.

Michelle

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Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 06-25-2006 - 9:06pm

Well, ya know if you are concerned and others have mentioned it never hurts to get an evaluation. I have no idea what your son is like in person and it is hard to tell from posts.

Also, when my ASD son was little I had a habit of highlighting all the positives about him and down playing any struggles. It kept us from getting a proper diagnosis for a very long time. We always want to tell the positives about our kids and that is wonderful, but I am just saying that we can sometimes taint something like a post in a positive direction and it is hard to write down all concerns.

Point being - go ahead and get him evaled. Call you local Early intervention program and see what comes of it.

My kids, in some ways they are doing excellent and in some ways they still struggle. I won't fib and sugar coat, it hasn't been a bed of roses and it isn't easy having special needs kids. But they are a couple of awesome kids with some really really neat traits. My son is great at completing his chores once he learns a new one and it is part of his routine. Once he learns a routine he is on autopilot. And if you prepare him in advance he can be the biggest helper and most compliant kid. Which is funny because most people would think he is horribly oppositional, but it is all a matter of understanding his autism and how he needs to be prepared.

Cait is a sweetheart. She tries so darn hard. She loves to help small children (other than her younger sister, lol). She is tons of fun to take shopping and help me cook. She is totally turning into a teen.

On the down side, they both are in special education and need supports. I would say they are moderately affected in different ways and it makes typical kid activities difficult. Cait is mainstreamed for academics but her executive functions are horrible. She was recently diagnosed with epilepsy too. She has freinds at school (all boys from her Asperger program) but none really at home. One from school she calls on occasion to see. She also has a boy friend ;-)

Mike is in a day class with a 1:1 aide but has a 120 IQ. He can't manage in a mainstream class all day so they have had to get creative with his class as he is in a learnign handicapped class. There was no placement for an academically able autistic child. He has a wonderful teacher and aide. He was able to mainstreamed for 1-2 hours this year and will be mainstreamed for 2-3 hours next year and hope to add on from there.

Today they are both sick (awe poor babies!)

Renee

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Registered: 10-03-2004
Sun, 06-25-2006 - 9:18pm

Dear Michelle,

Your son is very young, and he sounds like a neat little kid. Since he is SO young, you should know that at age 2, our child also had lots of language (with lots of repeating), liked other kids, had eye contact, etc. Our ds also started reading at 2, knew all his numbers and letters, etc. He is also gifted, still is ahead of grade level at age 9. Between 2 - 3, his difficulties surfaced, esp. sensory (loud sounds, crowds) and by 2 and a half, tantrumming was slowly becoming a bigger and bigger problem and he was having more problems with communicating in conversations.

How your ds responds to other children this next year will say alot. But I do think it wouldn't hurt anyone to get him evaluated anyways at this point, if you are even a little concerned. At 2, I really wasn't concerned. Our ds seemed just great, everyone thought so, pediatrician, caretakers (one of which was also a pediatrician!), friends, family.

Our son is dx'ed borderline PDD-NOS now, but not always so. The many therapies and assistance we have gotten him have made a huge difference. I used to wish with all my heart that we had noticed something even earlier than we did, by age 3, but in hindsight, I don't know how we would have known...

Anyways, just think about it. He really COULD be just gifted, as Renee says, but what if there is more there, and really he would be so ahead of the game if you could catch it now.

Just my thoughts, based on my own experience...

Sara
ilovemalcolm

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Registered: 06-25-2003
Sun, 06-25-2006 - 10:08pm

Michelle,


Hello and welcome to the board.


My personal theory is that if a mom has sufficient worries/doubts

-Paula

visit my blog at www.onesickmother.com