Pottytraining
Find a Conversation
Pottytraining
| Sun, 06-25-2006 - 9:51pm |
I had started Jake using the potty a while ago but kind of got side tracked with our house going up for sale and having a million people coming and going through here over the last couple of weeks and ended up going back to diapers. I have decided to start training again first thing tomorrow. I have come to the conclusion that pull ups are a complete waste of time for Jake because he just sees it like a diaper and holds his pee until he has one on. I don't think he gets the reason he's sitting on the potty either and just sees it almost like a seat he sits on while watching TV or reading a book. I think this time round I'm just going to go straight to training him on a seat on the toilet. Do you think this is a mistake? I was wondering if anyone had any suggestions or things that worked for them to keep the child busy in the bathroom. Did you use any visuals or timers etc.? Thanks and wish me luck!
Teresa
Teresa

Pages
I am of no help.
Potty training was evil. I am glad I am past that stage. I will say a prayer for you and send you some PT.
Renee
Teresa,
I am sorry. But I am of no help either. Peter just wasn't interested until Miss J in 2nd year preschool MADE him interested at 4 ys and something. His body had been totally ready. ANyhoo I am not sure what Miss J did exactly, I was told to send him in in real UNDERWEAR, with changes of clothes. I think
visit my blog at www.onesickmother.com
Funny you should mention this... Because I just switched Sylvia to underwear last week! She had been sitting on the potty for a while, but like you said, she just seemed to view it as a place to sit and read (and be alone for a while). If she happened to have to pee while she was sitting there, fine, but if not, she'd just pee in her pullup.
I went to an autism group meeting a couple of months ago and they did a whole session on potty training, and they said that you really have to just switch to underwear. Especially for Sylvia, who's hypotactile -- with the pullup on, she just had no clue when she was going. So on Wednesday afternoon, when she came home from school after her last day, we put her in underwear. For 2.5 days it was really horrible -- we changed her clothes soooo many times. And the thing is that Sylvie is a real perfectionist, so I had to remain REALLY positive so that she wouldn't get frustrated and give up. But here's the amazing thing: on Saturday, all of a sudden it clicked: she stayed dry all day, peed in the potty like a pro. She still doesn't initiate all that much -- I have to ask her periodically if she needs to go -- but she does hold it until she gets onto the potty. It's only been a couple of days so we're prepared for some backsliding, but I think we're on our way...
One thing that worked for us was figuring out the right "reinforcer" to use. We used a sticker chart -- she gets a sticker every time she pees or poops on the potty, and after 5 stickers, she gets a little prize (something from the dollar store). This seemed to work. Also, previously, she'd take a book on the potty and just hang out, and the presenter at the autism group said that Sylvia might be looking at the potty as a place she can go read rather than as a place where she does her business. So we stopped letting her take a book on the potty, and I'd just sit there with her, talking to her and telling her stories, and as soon as she peed, I'd get her off the potty and give her a sticker, so she immediately saw the cause and effect.
The other thing we did was write a social story, and we used photographs in it -- so, a picture of Sylvie, a picture of the potty, a picture of her sticker chart, a picture of a present -- so that she could have a good idea of what the procedure was going to be.
But honestly, I feel like she was just READY. A couple of days of wet clothes, and she figured out what she had to do. I'm not sure whether she would have been ready 6 months ago, or even 6 weeks ago -- this was just the right time. And also, *I* was ready! I had reached the point where I was willing to change her clothes however many times I needed to, and I was able to stay positive and upbeat and not get stressed or put pressure on her. I'm not sure I would have been able to do that 6 months ago, either, honestly!
GOOD LUCK, and just go ahead and give it a try!!! Keep us posted...
Jennifer
Hi Teresa,
We have just finished (I hope) this chapter. All kids are so different. For Eric it took about a year. It seems so ridiculous, but in some ways potty training him seems like my biggest accomplishment in life! LOL! Here is what we did. Bear in mind it may or may not work.
Pull-ups were useless. Even the "feel and learn" or whatever kind. He just couldn't tell he was wet. I ditched them and got the softer training underpants. They are like regular underpants but with a thicker middle section. At first Eric totally soaked them and didn't seem to notice. During this time, I would see his cycle of when he had to go and take him. About every hour. If he did it in the potty, he got a small reward (usually one small fruit candy). After about a month he was trained for number one. I used the soft potty seat that fits into the regular seat.
I did have a few books and a video, but he didn't really seem to care about them. I did put a picture schedule on the wall near each of the toilets in the house and that helped him. I also put a picture of the reward at the end.
Now, number 2 was another story. For us that took a year. He had some kind of phobia of doing that in the potty. He would hide and do it in his underpants then tell us he did it. I hope this does not happen to you. This is what we had to do there.
I watched until he would go hide then suggest he hide in the bathroom. At first he got a small reward (candy) for doing that. After he did that reliably, I suggest he sit on the potty (clothes on, lid closed) and we would together, dump the contents. He got a reward only for doing that. When that stage was finished, he sat with potty open (clothes on), reward etc. Then eventually with pants down.
We had a stool for his feet. Also, we had him pick the ultimate reward, a golden Thomas train. This was displayed in the bathroom at all times and was the reward he got if he pooped in the potty. He could play with it only when he pooped in the potty.
This long process took about a year. We started when he was 3 and only now at 4 is he trained with no. 2. As for night training, we did use pull-ups at night only. I didn't do anything special. After awhile, he just quit soaking them and once he was trained for no. 1 and 2 he was proud of himself and didn't want to wear pull-ups. He wet the bed once after that, got upset, and ever since he wakes and goes at night if he has to. I really didn't worry much about night training. Just changed the sheets etc. You can get a waterproof mattress cover and pads that catch everything pretty well. I got two and always had one clean on hand to change out.
Good luck. This is really a hard thing for our kids. In fact, I went to parent workshop at our local autism society on this topic and it was standing room only. The only other workshop as well attended was on picky eating, so it seems are kids all have trouble in these areas.
Wishing you luck!
HTH
Katherine
Looks like Jennifer and I went to the same workshop! LOL!
I just wanted to reiterate what Jennifer said about the reinforcer. I didn't want to do it that way, but it is what worked. And, we were able to fade out the reinforcer after awhile when Eric's own pride in his accomplishment kicked in, but he needed that "bribe" at first.
Secondly, I didn't mention it, but at the workshop they said the same thing about not hanging out and playing, reading, in the potty. It should be just a place to get business done!
We also took a photo of Eric and used it in the picture schedule, along with the picture of the reinforcer.
Anyway, give it a go. Lay in large quantities of the laundry stain remover of your choice, and try to see the humor in it all!
This is one of those things where when they finally "get it" you will be soooooo proud of them!!!
Katherine
This is always such an interesting topic.
Powered by CGISpy.com
This is funny. Mitchell was scared of the big potty. The first small potty (on the floor) was too unstable for him and he didn't like getting on and off of it. I borrowed my nephew's once when Mitch was there and it seemed so stable. My SIL didn't care for that chair and of course her son was ready to use the toilet, just like dad. (my nephew is one month older than my son but he's NT of course) Anyway, the potty chair was a God-send and a curse! It was a God-send because we did stop using diapers at first for just #1 too. He would wait until he had a diaper on and do #2, so he was very good at holding BMs until 9 or 10 at night. Sometimes later in the night. Let me tell you that got old FAST - I finally get him tucked in and then we gotta go through that! :) I took him to Target and had him pick a soft seat that fit on top of potty and gave him treats for sitting on it and *trying* but alas no luck. He was then BMing on small potty reliably and he was pretty consistent at 10 pm. We were essentially not changing diapers. (weird he could do that) but then the day came when he had to go and DH and him were at Meijer's. Had to race home after dancing around and melting down in public restroom there. So i could see this issue had to get resolved. I didn't know how just kept being patient and encouraging the soft on top of potty seat, telling him how Laura (his sister) and his cousin use the potty, etc, showing him he's too big to go down the drain...and waiting patiently. So the seat was a curse because we couldn't get rid of it until 6/13/06, 4 yo and one month!!
Well, so we're at the 3 hour autism eval reviewing issues which to me included BM problem at 4 yo. Guess what? DS decides he has to BM while at this appt. I laughed at the irony and the situation ever so briefly on the outside. So I took him to the toilet and it was a big one. I sat on the toilet and held him in front of me. He thought this was funny and he asked what if I kaka on you? I told him we were going home soon and I would change my clothes then. He didn't want to do it on the toilet at home but now that I knew he COULD I didn't let him go back on that little potty and hid it lickety split. So now we are doing BMs on our big toilet at home with the dora soft seat on top. whew... I think I should buy one or two more soft seats to keep in the car just in case now....
Good luck and be patient!
Wendy
Hi Wendy,
Isn't it funny how talking about potty training is kind of like sharing war stories! LOL! Once we finally got DS potty trained for bm's we had the problem with him witholding which is a whole different saga. But all is well now! (Our soft seat is Blues Clues!!)
I also thought of something else I heard at that seminar, not that it is that important but it might make us all feel better. They said that most children are ready to be potty-trained when they are at the "developmental age" of age 3, which for many kids on the spectrum is the "chronological age" of age 5. So I guess we are kind of lucky in that way.
Katherine
Wendy's post made me think of one more thing -- we bought a fold-up travel cushioned potty chair from One Step Ahead, and it has been the BEST purchase we ever made!!! Sylvia is terrified of sitting on a regular potty without a potty chair on it. And it makes sense -- she's got such a skinny heinie, and it takes a lot of balance for kids to straddle the big seat! Anyway, we bring that travel potty seat wherever we go, and as long as we have it, she'll go in any toilet, anywhere.
Katherine -- thanks for the GREAT advice about training #2! We're still not there yet. Yesterday we had a giant poo in the underwear -- ICK!!! But normally she just does #2 either first thing in the morning, before she takes her nighttime pullup off, or as soon as she puts her nighttime pullup on at bedtime. I *really* like your idea about working that in stages -- first just having her "hide" in the bathroom, etc. Thanks!!!
Jennifer
I am so thankful you posted this!! I was coming on here this morning to do just that!! LOL
Joey turns 3 tomorrow and we've had some hits and misses in the potty training dept, 'pun intended' LOL One day he will go most of the time with prodding, then the next, he absolutely refuses to do it! It's getting frustrating for dh who doesn't understand the whole ASD thing. He thinks Joey should just go like the others did. I had him read this and I'm hoping that he understands a little better now.
I'm heading off to the Walmart to see if I can find a padded seat. He uses the plastic one that sits on top of the big potty for now, but doesn't really like it. Maybe if we get the other one, it will help. Not sure if they make one without faces on it though, as he has a BIG thing about sitting on people/characters on them. I bought him a chair with Elmo on it and he refuses to sit on it cuz it has a face on it.
Thank you all for your 'war stories'!
Stacy
Pages