Sara's Pity Party

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2004
Sara's Pity Party
11
Sat, 03-15-2008 - 12:51pm

I am so tired of getting school rejections. This is the second year we are applying to special needs private schools that might be appropriate for our special, fabulous boy and after last year, rejection after rejection, now again we are down to only 2 schools left of the ones we applied to this year and I am just SO FECKIN' BLUE AND DOWN AND DIRTY EXHAUSTED!!!! No room, not a match, no room, not a match. Demmit!!!

Yes we are homeschooling. But DH and I are at our limit financially and emotionally. If we are stuck without a good school again for next Fall, we have to make even more changes and I have no idea how we will do that, as right now we simply are copping no breaks at all, no money, almost no down time, DH is working over 60 hours a week so I can do more of the homeschooling, I am working less hours, we can't can't can't keep this up.

And this week, besides getting more rejection letters, all our home services were cut off by the State of New York, so no OT, Speech or play therapy and those were great people doing great work with DS. I thought we could fight them, but they just are cutting off payment to therapists directly and we can't ask people to keep working without pay while we fight. Just for the he!! of it, I am filing for an impartial hearing anyways, why not! At least it will feel like doing something... I could try looking into Medicaid for services, but right this second I am not even capable of tackling another behemoth organizational morass, capesh?

I NEED A VACATION!!! MORE THAN THAT, I NEED TO GET A BREAK FROM THIS UNIVERSE.

I keep saying over and over to myself "He's doing great! It's all worth it! He's doing great!" But as I write this, tears are pouring down my face,

Help, my friends.

Sara

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-28-2008
Sat, 03-15-2008 - 1:25pm

{{{{{Sara}}}}}

You are one amazing lady to have done all that you have already. I can't even imagine homeschooling, let alone working at all during it. I hope one of the schools finally pans out for you. As for a vacation........in our dreams anything can happen,lol.

I'm so glad that your DS is doing so well. Those small victories are priceless and make all the work worth it.

Keep going. Don't give up. We're here for you.

Drea

Andrea, mom to

Graham
Miles
Anson
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-28-2007
Sat, 03-15-2008 - 2:24pm

Sara,

I don't know how you have made it this far without totally imploding. You are truly amazing!!!

As I have followed the Malcolm and NY BOE saga for quite a while now I guess I feel I can offer the following; I KNOW you love NYC, but is it time to look at some kind of move, a neighboring borough/state? Or is it time to look at possible boarding school options. I know you may poo poo this right away and I would normally be a "stay and fight" kind of woman. But this was why we moved out of Maryland. Parts of Maryland were great, but we couldn't afford to move into them, hence the drastic move to GA. I actually would have moved further North but I can't abide the snow, lol. Hugs and peace gf,

Dee

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-2006
Sat, 03-15-2008 - 4:02pm

Sara, you are such a strong and amazing woman.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-12-2004
Sun, 03-16-2008 - 10:18am

Hi Sara..


I have been missing for a while from all boards , but I just wanted to send you a big hug , and tell you you will get through this ...Im so very sorry for all this BS with the state of NY , its appalling ....I agree with the considering a move

thanks for posting that ..its lovely espcially the end part
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2003
Sun, 03-16-2008 - 11:09am

I don't visit messageboards often, but I do remember when you started homeschooling because that's when I started homeschooling my son. I had gotten no where with the IEP process and

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 03-16-2008 - 11:27am

Sara,

I am really sorry. What a long, horrible journey this has been. THe NYC special education services just really sound very very lacking. I hope you find something, some relief or new inovative idea to help soon.

Renee

Disney08

APOV on Autism
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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2004
Sun, 03-16-2008 - 7:42pm

Thanks everyone,

and yes Dee, we do think about moving and don't poo poo it at all. We are not just staying because we love NYC, in fact, these days we often DON'T love NYC. But we have such a close circle of friends here and more importantly, Malcolm has such close important peer friendships that are so valuable, plus his many important grownup relationships -- private psychotherapist of many years and other grownups (horseback teacher, Tae Kwondo sensei, music teacher, others) so going would really be uprooting us. We don't know for sure of anywhere that we can guarantee the school situation would work out, so all this makes even thinking about moving tough. But DH and I talk about it constantly.

We would think about a suburb, although commuting would be very hard for me and my work, not so much DH. Our apt. here in City is now worth LOADS of money, so if we sold it we really would have a chunk of change to work with in relocating.

And yes, we have always been "stay and fight" kinda people. We will see if DS gets into either one of the 2 schools left, and then if not, well. We'll come to that bridge then. I already feel better for having unloaded, and while I am still feeling very shaky these days, rest and a fun weekend of activities has helped a lot ... Plus, as always, all your support helps immensely!!!

Thanks again, you all,

Sara

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2003
Mon, 03-17-2008 - 9:55am

Sara-


I'm sorry I'm so late in responding to your original message, but I hope you know just how much I've gained from "watching" your incredible story unfold.

Meez 3D avatar avatars games

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2003
Mon, 03-17-2008 - 12:04pm

Sara,


I'm late too, but want to tell you how sorry I am for your complete and utter exhaustion with all of this.

Molly
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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 03-17-2008 - 3:19pm

((((SARA)))))

I thought I'd responded to this, but it's not here so... I just wanted to tell you how much I admire your courage and strength through the whole fight you've had with the sd and all the junk you've had to endure. Keep fighting the fight! I hope and pray that one of these last 2 schools is the answer you've been waiting and working for. I'm so proud of you for giving your all for your son.

Betsy

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