Sensory issues

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-02-2003
Sensory issues
4
Sun, 08-24-2003 - 12:10pm
Hi,

My nephew (2.5) seems to me has some sensory issues. Ex: night terrors from wearing footy pjs(having feet covered), they had to take all the pictures off the walls of his bedroom, b/c they cast shadows that frighten him in the night etc. I also know a couple of weeks ago he was out on the sidewalk cruising in his little "foot power car" and they had to take him out of it to go clean up his toes b/c they were bleeding from scraping them on the concrete (wearing sandals) and he didn't even know it!

My brother & SIL are kinda sensitive to thinking there might be something remotely wrong with their little boy. So I have to be kinda careful to the info I give them. Someone already suggested the book "Out of Sync Child" but I know just from the title they'd never go get it.

Any Suggestions??

My ds, Justin (AS), doesn't seem to have too many sensory issues so I don't have much info on that.

Thanks much,

Angie

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-05-2003
In reply to: angie8270
Sun, 08-24-2003 - 2:19pm
Angie,

This link http://www.sinetwork.org is for people who need information on sensory intergration dysfunction issues. They have a lot of great info for you about a whole range of sensory issues. You might want to try the "my friend's kid has the same thing as your son and this is what they did" approach when their son is exhibiting one of the sensory issues such as the sandal episode, so as not to make them feel like their child is the only one on the planet with that problem .

I've got alot of experience with humans who are ostriches (my husband's entire family) and it's horrible to see "denial" when it comes to a child. It's a real shame that their child is going to "suffer" because they don't or won't readily or easily acknowledge a problem. Or that there's some shame in admitting that your child isn't perfect.

When I've commented that my husband's niece is not acting like a typical 1 year old - very serious, gross motor skills problems, not babbling - my husband (who has AS and doesn't know it and probably has a sister (the baby's mother) and his father who have it)says I'm always looking for problems. It's not that, it's that I'm sensitive because I'm living with a child who has problems and see things in a different light. Sometimes other children's quirky behavior might send a signal to you, that maybe a parent can't see, that isn't exactly typical of that child's age.

I've not said anything to my SIL because she doesn't believe that my son has AS and that his problem is nothing more than he's just a spoiled brat, so I'm not wasting my breath talking her about it (she's the nastiest person I've ever met and I've not said two words to her since I married into the family 12 years ago but that's a whole other issue).

Good Luck,

Leenie

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-02-2003
In reply to: angie8270
Sun, 08-24-2003 - 2:37pm
Thank you Leenie!

Much appreciated. I will check out the link.

Yea, it is really hard to try to help people who don't want to admit there is an issue. I agree w/ you that having a special needs child makes us more aware of how kids behave.

I will just try to be descreet about it if I can.

They don't have a problem w/ Justin's AS and are very supportive so I think they would take to something like this better than your SIL.

I think it's the right thing to do, getting them info. I would've wanted someone to do it for me!

Take Care,

Angie

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: angie8270
Mon, 08-25-2003 - 1:29pm
I have to put in my two cents. Being a person with AS, We think it is pretty normal to chew shirts, wear our fingers nad toes out till they bleed, fear footie pajamas and tags and to be "not" normal. If we accept that our kid is not normal, it means that we must accept that we are not normal as well. It is a big leap to make. and takes mental fortutide that most of us dont possess. I'm not sure what how to encourage fellow parents to get their kids help, as most of us adults just endured our childhoods until we were able to escape into adulthood where we can be "excentric" and accepted for that.

I would give the sun and the moon to redo my childhood with the help MY kids have been given fitting in to the world.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-02-2003
In reply to: angie8270
Mon, 08-25-2003 - 4:04pm
Hi Crystal,

Thank you for your 2 cents. I totally understand the AS stuff as my ds Justin has AS. Justin is the opposite tho, he screams every time he gets a little scrape rather than running around with bloody toes like my nephew. I know all kids have differences just like Justin didn't talk until he was 3 and my nephew has been making sentences with great enunciation since he was 12-14 mo. old. He's not awkward like Justin either.

I guess my biggest problem is that I really am not sure how to tell my brother & sil my suspicions about their son. I get along great with them, but they are kinda, "there's nothing wrong with my kid" defensive. You know, they say oh he's just over stimulated, or excited etc etc. I don't want to put a strain on our relationship but I want to be able to share info with them. I feel that maybe if I tell them what I suspect that they will think, "oh she just doesn't want to be alone in having something wrong with her kid that she wants to find faults in everyones kid." Which is not the case.

I know how hard it is to accept that there is something wrong with your child as Justin started life with a heart defect and then the AS dx at age 6.

My favorite quote that gets me through a lot is:

"I have learned to see past what my son isn't and focus on who he is. It takes time to find it in your heart."

I have even shared this quote with them. Anyway I just don't know weather to take the risk and tell them what I think and give them info or wait a bit and see how things go for them.

Angie