So Darn Angry

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
So Darn Angry
14
Fri, 06-01-2007 - 8:47pm
just needed to get rid of what I wrote


Edited 6/2/2007 5:25 pm ET by rbear4
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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-28-2007
In reply to: rbear4
Sat, 06-02-2007 - 10:47am

Renee,

Liam and Mike are two peas in a pod. I have often been where you are right now; it just seems like the battle is endless and when they turn on us and yes, lets face it AS or not they can still be jacka$$es. Yes, there may be many contributing factors, end of year, sensorty overload, blah de blah de blah, but at the end of the day you don't hit your mother!!!! Oh and when Liam does, he gets a right swat back (so Rina I'm with ya there).

Your anger is real and justified. Mike will not waste away in his room and perhaps you going all out with these consequences he'll realize (maybe....) that his behavior will not be tolerated. Oh and yes, Vegas baby!!!

Dee

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2003
In reply to: rbear4
Sat, 06-02-2007 - 11:18am

First off, huge hugs coming your way, Renee. I feel horrible that you're going through this. It's simply not fair. Nobody deserves to be treated that way- and why is it they ALWAYS abuse the ones that love them the most??? I am, as always, in awe of your patience. Had it been one of my kids, I wouldn't have been able to remain calm. In fact, I would have "officially" stopped being their mom. I wouldn't have done a darn thing for them. "Can I have a drink?" "No, sorry...the drinks in this house are for people who treat their family members respect." Okay, so it's a Catholic mom guilt-ploy, but it works in our house.

I know my post is "after the fact"- but kudos to you for sticking it out. You are an incredible wife, mom, and woman. You have every right to be incredibly angry- your son crossed a line, and there is no excuse for that type of behavior.

Hang in there, beautiful!

Amy

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2004
In reply to: rbear4
Sat, 06-02-2007 - 11:23am

Hey Renee,

Just wanted to give you a shout out from here. Of course he should not hit his mother, but sadly he still doesn't have control of his actions and not even with you. And somehow he must learn and how to have that happen is the most frustrating and frightening part of this whole equation. If only someone knew. If only there would be a pill or a behavioral mod technique or a therapy that would answer this question once and for all. And I so understand your overwhelming question of whether or not you should just give up, when something so deeply upsetting happens. And now how to help him understand how much you have been hurt, is there a way...

Which of course does not mean he shouldn't have consequences. But the reaction you are having is huge and probably building over years and not only in response to this one hit. I am so sorry ((((((hugs))))). I still wish you could fly out for some long-distance therapy, heck, I wish I could get some for myself.

In terms of taking breaks from him and then having him go to hell in a handbasket, well, he does go to hell in a handbasket on you, too --- but you have taken and taken it in stride. Others call you in desparation, but you have noone to call. I'm right with you there, baby, the buck stops here. So unfair. Completely draining.

How're ya doing today?

more ((((((hugs))))),

Sara

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: rbear4
Sat, 06-02-2007 - 2:52pm

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