still seeking a diagnosis

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2003
still seeking a diagnosis
Sun, 08-10-2003 - 1:46am
I have 4 sons ages 9, 11, 13, and 15 and a daughter age 7. They have all had various degrees of speech problems. and other things that have a common thread. My 13 year old year old son has gathered alot of labels over the years from selective mutism as a toddler along with an articulation disorder (he was hard to understand when he did speak but he always had above average understanding of what was said). He later gathered other labels like dysgraphia , dysthymia (low level depression) and dyspraxia( for him it has to do with both his overall motor skills and his speech) and ADD. He is now doing very well in school..he is going into advanced placement classes with support in his writing area only.. though socially he is unusual..he doesn't have usual social interactions with other children and is prone to say quirky things.. that people take wrong but he just doesn't always get the social give and take of it all. My oldest is also socially not able to really integrate in normal ways and is very bright. My 11 year old is highly gifted and can't follow a 2 step command.. then there is my 9 yr old which brings me here to the board .. his speech therapist was talking to me how I should investigate why I have so many children following the same pattern.. she is puzzled with this particular son he is a very bright successful student with some puzzling speech patterns. He locks into strange patterns. He was selectively mute.. He still is sometimes (currently he is in spanish ..he knows the language but chooses not to use it most of the time..except with select individuals..his dad and he has now chosen one friend and school he met who cannot speak English..he deems worthy..which is a break through..since he has few people he considers "friends". He is very methodical on how he does things. I came in this room because even though I have no idea what exactly we are dealing with could be anything..I figure I would start here.. and ask questions.... first of all is it possible for this to run in families? I know whatever this is is familial. It comes from the Grandfather and my husband.(the speech, pacing and learning disablity part at least is shared through both and the depression part from my one son is shared by the grandfather). I thought the dypraxia was the answer but its not enough. And as I'm starting to realize I need more to help my kids get to adult hood healthy and happy. I want them to be independent. Any ideas will be helpful.. I was not pursuing anything because the speech therapist said I should..because when does eccentric end and a problem begin? Do normal 13 yr olds shout out loudly on buses when someone is standing in front of the bus in front of the yellow line reading the rules that are printed at the front of the bus? stating the rules are being broken over and over again. He was like but they are breaking the rules. My 9 yr old was known as the policeman at his otherschool we had to train him at this school not to be. His teacher taught him playground games so he could do something else..he then delighted in being in control of the rules of those games. But its better than when he marched around in a box in 2nd grade getting his "excersise". Now he will join in organized games even if he isn't in control but not always. My kids used to chew holes in their shirts and throw loud tantrums I had to literally have to sit with them to contain (my daughter still does this sometimes she is 7) but I always contributed this to the speech part of it the highneeds part of it. but now its like there is a missing link.. not enough. because by now with my 15 yr old the speech is solved but why isn't he acting completely like a normal teen? what is missing? sigh... juana 5

Juana mother of 5