Support Needed

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Support Needed
17
Sat, 02-04-2006 - 12:54pm

hi all. i guess i'm finally ready to come here with this. i have been here daily, but haven't posted much lately. dh decided he was leaving me on january 8th. he moved out and we are separated. then i found out a week later he is living with a woman whom he is starting a new relationship with. it was a blow like i could not explain. the pain was almost more then i could bare. the details are more then i could get into here. i didn't know how i was going to make it. this is a man who told me from the beginning that he didn't believe in divorce and that he would never leave me. the line he came up with that is engraved in our wedding bands is "i will never love another".

the only good thing that has come out of this is that i have lost 32# in the last month!! it has jump started interest in me cutting calories and dieting that i haven't had in probably 5+ years.

i have started this thread 5 times and never ending up posting it. now i'm ready to. for those who have known me, i've been here a few years now. can use all the prayers i can get right now. don't know what the future holds. but i'm doing a bit better with each day. thanks for reading. valerie

~Valerie

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2004
In reply to: vcjacobs
Sat, 02-04-2006 - 1:15pm

((((((((HUGS)))))))) VALERIE!!!!! I'm soooooo sorry. Please write me, let me know how you're doing!! Wish I could climb thru the computer and be there for you!!!!!

michelle

Avatar for littleroses
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
In reply to: vcjacobs
Sat, 02-04-2006 - 1:29pm

I can't believe the pain you are going through. The betrayal must be incredibly difficult to endure. I'm very sorry this is happening to you. You have had a lot put on your plate. I hope you have someone supportive around you as well to talk to?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: vcjacobs
Sat, 02-04-2006 - 2:58pm
thank you for your kindness. yes, i have support--but i have never really learned how to accept support from others. so i'm pretty much on my own. but i'm learning, and trying. i am working with a counselor, and relooking at what is missing in my life as well. the last few days i have started to find some peace within myself. most of the time it still feels like a bad dream and i just hope i wake up from it. :(
~Valerie
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: vcjacobs
Sat, 02-04-2006 - 3:55pm

valerie,

Good for you for finally posting this here and reaching out to your many friends. And good for you for seeing the counselor and taking care of yourself.

I know this has been tough for you. Sending you lots of hugs and prayers. Let me know whatever I can do.

Renee

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2004
In reply to: vcjacobs
Sat, 02-04-2006 - 5:10pm

Dear Valerie,

That is such hard news and all my prayers and strong wishes for healing, strength and every other kind of support are comin' atcha from NYC. We will light you a candle in the window here tonight. Many (((((HUGS))))).

yours,

Sara
ilovemalcolm

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2001
In reply to: vcjacobs
Sat, 02-04-2006 - 7:12pm

(((((Valerie))))) I am so sorry to hear this.

 


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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
In reply to: vcjacobs
Sat, 02-04-2006 - 7:25pm

Hugs my friend, and a whole plate full of low fat cookies and skim milk!

In my personal life I can think of more then one time where it all seemed like there was no point to the pain I was feeling only to have it clear to me a few years later why it was actually a good thing. I hope, as time passes there can be some sense made of your pain.

I am so sorry this is happening to you! Lots of hugs, prayers and positive thoughts my friend!

Sio

Avatar for stephsmom98
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
In reply to: vcjacobs
Sat, 02-04-2006 - 8:12pm

((((((((hugs and prayers))))) to you Valerie. I couldn't imagine the pain and betrayal you are going through. That is wonderful you are helping yourself and getting counselor. You are in my prayers.

Debbie

Debbie, Mom to my "only" Stephanie
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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
In reply to: vcjacobs
Sat, 02-04-2006 - 9:52pm

Valerie,

I'm so sorry this is happening to you. (((hugs))) We're thinking of you, and wishing you the best. How are the kids holding up?

Evelyn

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-09-2005
In reply to: vcjacobs
Sat, 02-04-2006 - 10:25pm

Valerie,

((((((((HUGS))))))))

Sending you prayers and hugs.. I know how hard this must be..

Take Care
Kate

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