Thank you for your support...

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-24-2003
Thank you for your support...
1
Fri, 09-05-2003 - 5:13pm
Hey all. Thank you for the feed back on my last post. I wanted to give you guys an update on the school and Catie.

On Thursday i took her in a few minutes early and spoke with the teachers Aide. The preschool teacher was talking to another parent. Catie got her name tag on with no problem, but she wouldnt follow up with getting her name and putting it on the Job board. She went to the kitchen area and started setting up a tea party (one of her favorite things to do). I tried to get her to come with me back to the job board, and she persistantly told me no! and i finally said to myself screw it, she is on their time now! lol

So i went to the aide and asked her if Catie's behavior was unusual to her. Meaning, has she had this experience with other children before. The first thing each child does is get their name tag, then they pick a job to do on the board, then they sit at the table where their name is and color until the teacher is ready. Well, every morning Catie goes to the kitchen and plays with the Tea Set.

The aide said that Catie is very independent and seems to want to do her own thing. I explained she has ALWAYS been that way. At 9 months i walked into daycare and she was sitting looking at a wall while the other kids where in a group playing with blocks. She has just always been that way. She loves other kids, but she is just one of those that thinks "just because they are doing it doesnt mean i have to". i gave the aide some back ground on her medical history, and i explained that we have these experiences at home. Etc etc.

She told me not to worry and it would work itself out.

I went to pick Catie up and i took my husband with me, just in case. And the teacher came over and told me she had a "great day" and "her tantrums were less severe today". Whatever that is supposed to mean.

I take Catie a zip lock baggie with a few marshmellows in them and she isnt allowed to open them until we get to the car. And she always leaves pleasantly. She even hugged her teacher and gave her a kiss on the cheek. (example of her not understanding bounderies, everyone is a family member).

The answer to some of the questions on the other posts:

She is going to a regular elementary school. She was in Early Intervention and then at 3 i guess she was transferred from EI to the District program. She got a new case worker (who just met her tuesday) and this is the school that program has placed her in.

Apparently today (Friday) they are having a meeting on "how to handle Catie". Meaning, i guess how to work with her better. She has two people (speech therapists, behavior) who works with her, and they are meeting with their boss about her.

I am not really happy about them "restraining" her either, but they used the excuse of "we can't let her have tantrums here in preschool". What i explained was it was them holding her in their lap until the tantrum passed. But with out me being there, i can't really judge if i don't want them doing it. There is a parent in the room as well, atleast all this week there was. So i can't imagine them actually HURTING her.

She has an appointment with her Psychologist on Tuesday. I made the appointment in a panic but i think i will keep it. It wouldnt hurt to get his opinion on the matter. He doesnt know we are pregnant, and actually had suggested we wait until she is in first grade to have another one. Well, too late now! i think he jinxed me. So i have to catch up with him anyways and get some more suggestions on things to do with her.

In the last 48 hours, i have started using the 1-2-3 thing with her. I see other parents do it. They tell the child to do something, then start counting and watch how fast the child runs. I am trying to get Catie to associate not minding with punishment. She doesnt seem to understand what is coming. So, i started counting to 3, and on three i smack her lightly on the butt and then walk her to what i wanted her to do, or where i wanted her to sit.

AMAZING. I just found her jumping on my bed for the umpteenth time. I went in and told her, again, STOP JUMPING and get down! you know you aren't allowed up there. She immediately dove under the covers. I started to count, ONE TWO and she high tailed it off the bed and headed down the hall. I couldn't believe my EYES! i was like MY GOSH! i have screamed and yelled and spanked and time outs... and all i had to do was count and associate a smack on the rear with counting. And WHAM. Well, i know better to count my eggs before they hatch. It might have just been a coincedence. But maybe this will work.

We havent had much trouble with her transitioning here at the house. She has learned to move along better, and i have learned to plan accordingly and offer incentives. And i found the ones that work best are ones she can see. Marshmellows, fruit snacks, band aids, stickers. She doesnt do well with "if you do this i will take you in the car".

I figure i should learn something on Tuesday both from the Psychologist and from the meeting they had today. I will keep you guys posted.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2003
Fri, 09-05-2003 - 6:30pm
Kudos to you, Lady!

It sounds like you have everything in hand.

Let us know how it goes, OK?

-Paula

-Paula

visit my blog at www.onesickmother.com