That's IT - he's getting evaluated

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Registered: 03-27-2003
That's IT - he's getting evaluated
8
Tue, 10-16-2007 - 10:47am

OK......I've really had enough of these two kids!!! Grr...

Sam is having a really hard time waking up for school in the morning. After trying very hard to gently wake him up and cajole him out of bed with promises of yummy breakfasts and "ooooh, it's art day today." After a half hour popping in on him every 5 min. doing this, I end up having to drag him out of bed. There's some screaming and alot of fighting from Sam. Any kind of upper arm assist (that's what the Psych. calls it) is construed as restraint by Sam no matter how hands off and gentle I try to be. And he hates to be restrained so there's more pushing and squirming from him and sometimes some running off and hiding (that's usually when I drop my head and heave a nice big sigh....)

Some days he does get himself dressed and is pretty jolly. I like those days until we get past breakfast when it's time to brush teeth and Sam and Harrison are chasing each other around screaming - did I mention that this day starts at 530am.

I am ready to admit that something is going on with Harrison(2.5.) I do not believe this is just typical terrible twos.....there's too many things that perplex me and the typical behavioral mod stuff isn't working with him either - big flag for us....BTDT!!! We've been going to more moms group activities and seeing him with other kids is eye opening as well. He will occasionally play with other kids his own age; is pretty good taking turns...etc. But he really would rather play with older kids (Sam is 8) and is completely enthralled with kids 6-12 months. He generally eyes a fellow toddler with a "who's this kid coming over to ruin my fun" look. He does sit for a story at library story time but hates all the singing; he actually sunk down in his seat and scowled last week. If I wasn't a spectrum mom, it would probably be funny, but it just creeps me out. Eye contact is difficult at these events too. I'm often calling his name and being ignored. I keep saying that he's the opposite of Sam, but I'm now realizing that he is alot like Sam minus the aggression. And instead of tearing off around the library and screaming, he quietly wanders around. I swear the second the words , 'no," "stop, " put that down" or "give that to me" escape my mouth, he's working faster at doing whatever it is he's not supposed to be doing instead of stopping. It's pretty annoying. And for some odd reason, he is an angel with anyone else but me or DH. When we take Sam to karate, he loves interacting with the other parents and seeks attention from anyone but me. If I try to play with him, he takes off and I'm constantly trying to stop him from running into the dojo, into the parking lot, the office.....etc. He won't interact with me there; he seeks negative attention constantly even though I try really hard to find something fun for us to do together. He's the same with DH.

So what was the straw that broke the camels back? Dinner time. Harrison is unable to sit and have a somewhat peaceful dinner with us. He throws food, plates, plates of food, cups, beams people with forks. Last night he popped the platic seat back to his booster seat off and THREW it across the table at DH. I put him in his crib (which he thankfullly stilll likes and doesn't climb out off.) I just don't know what to do.

I'm ready for some drugs my self, and lots of wine and chocolate too. I feel like my children hate me and are trying to enact some kind of wicked revenge on me for (heaven forbid) trying to be a good parent for them. I just can't keep it together all day under this pressure; I'm way to high strung and this is just so freakin' wearing on my patience.

I'm off for a much needed nap......gotta prepare for homework time....sigh

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Registered: 06-25-2003
Tue, 10-16-2007 - 6:49pm

Christine,


On the waking up thing for Sam, maybe invest in an alarm clock to make the process more impersonal?

-Paula

visit my blog at www.onesickmother.com
Avatar for nutmegspice
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Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 10-16-2007 - 7:01pm

Oh how I wish an alarm clock would work!!! We have one and it's set very loud but I swear he sleeps right through it and I still have to drag him out of bed. We have one of the rumbly kind too.....my MIL got it somewhere cheap....that doesn't work either....sigh

Thanks for the idea though :)

Chrystee

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Tue, 10-16-2007 - 7:37pm

Chrystee, does he like heat?

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Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 10-16-2007 - 8:44pm

That is an awesome idea!!!! I do put his clothes under his blanket to warm them up. He doesn't like to be cold nor does he like to be hot......getting up is incredibly jarring for him in many many ways. This may help - I'll definately give it a try.

Thanks!

Chrystee

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Tue, 10-16-2007 - 9:04pm

I can tell you when I had to be up at the crack of dawn in middle/high school, I would put my clothes under the covers while I used the bathroom etc; sometimes I even put them on a radiator or eater; HATED cold lothes. To this day I'm the same.

Dee

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APOV on Autism
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Registered: 11-28-2006
Tue, 10-16-2007 - 10:25pm
So glad I could help :)
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Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 10-17-2007 - 7:48am

The advantage of getting him evaluated is that you'll know, one way or the other. I find it is hard to know what is 'normal'/'typical' and what is or should be 'red flag' behaviour any more. My 4 year old NT is an absolute horror at the moment, but friends, fellow parents, teachers and other professionals assure me that it is in line with other kids...I have no frame of reference because when DS1 was 4 he was an (undiagnosed) Asperger's!


I don't know if it will make it easier, or harder, if he comes back as 'normal' though....there's some kind of assumption there that it is therefore your fault, which clearly isn't the case.


You can pass the wine and chocolate back to me, when you're done...:-)


Kirsty, mum to Euan (9, Asperger's, ) Rohan (4, NT) and Maeve (23m, NT)

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Registered: 10-22-2007
Mon, 10-22-2007 - 2:11pm

Hi, I am new here. I have a 5 1/2 year old recently dx PDD-NOS. I thought her brothers were NT, but I suspect the 3 1/2 year old is going to get the same dx. My 2 year old just got the PDD-NOS> ADOS score of 7 so very subtle, but it is hard to know what is normal when your oldest is on the spectrum and the other kids seem more developed at their age than the oldest was. I would get all my kids evaluated if I had one on the spectrum. All my kids symptoms are more subtle. People who don't know about ASD don't see the stuff I know is spectrum like. My 2 year old is going to get a ton of services because I got him a dx at age 2. Even though he is very mild PDD-NOS I would rather get the services now (while they are free too!)

Here are 2 of my kiddos:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w1Tn2ecnZ88

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dyG4c9KUTUw

3 1/2 year old referred by developmental ped for ASD eval:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EJ7Jb7MqMfA