Touchy Feely Impulsivity
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| Mon, 11-21-2005 - 12:13pm |
Sam (6.5, dx AS) is very affectionate and touchy feely. He is in a regular 1st grade class this year. Last year in a regular Kindy class with a very hands on teacher who did alot of horsing around and wrestling with him. This seemed to help abate some of his tendency to hang on classmates...etc.
This year he is having a big problem with hanging on kids in class and kissing them. Alot of inappropriate behavior of this kind when he is doing "board work." Which is basically when they follow their list of activities on the board and go to the different centers. This is when the teacher is working with a small group of kids for their small group reading time so Sam has to be somewhat independent. She says he does fine with the work. He isn't taking too long or getting overly frustrated or super un-focused. He's just trying to horse around with everyone while he's doing it all.
He's also having a hard time with waiting his turn answering at carpet time and gets upset if he's not called on or if someone says the same thing as him. Fri. he was stomping his feet, banging on the desk and crying.
I know putting him in a smaller class with an aide would help and it's something I'm looking into. We had a meeting on Fri. and his teacher said the principle was pretty adamant that Sam would be staying in her class. Of course she wasn't present to explain this. This week is so hectic with the holiday, but next week Sp. Ed and the principle are getting a call about this. The Sp. Ed cooridinator also is asking the supervisor about a smaller placement, perhaps an inclusion classroom.
He's been doing alot of kissing etc at soccer too. The kids try to be kind and get away with out hurting his feelings, but he just doesn't get it and says, " I can't help myself. I don't know how to stop."
Any ideas. I already have a school rule social story that mentions kissing and jumping on friends. Anything else I could do? He gets OT once a week at school but I don't think that will ever give him the input he's looking for at school on a daily basis. His teacher isn't willing to horse around with him like his former Kindy teacher did.
Thanks!
Chrystee


Chrystee,
Does Sam have an aid this year? What kind of accomodations do they have for him?
My son, Nathan, is also in 1st grade. He's affectionate and touchy too, his brother HATES this!!! He jumps all over him and ME too. He also loves to touch our faces!! LOL Nathan only does this at home though, not at school. He seems to be aware of his boundaries at school.
I guess I'm wondering if there's anyone to help prompt him on his behavior at school. I know that this helps Nathan a great deal, having someone to turn to and to help him when needed.
michelle
He does not have an aide and there is no aide in the class. Something else I am working on. I definately think that would help in the short run to give the teacher and his classmates some slack. But it really is a constant battle of redirecting and reminding him to stop. He really can't do it himself so I think the long term solution is to give him the tools to keep it under control on his own somehow. I'm not sure what that is though.
Just the other day at his soccer game, we spent our time on the side lines yelling (because it's so darned loud!) at him to get off of his teammates the entire time he was on the field. It's annoying for all involved and redirecting doesn't really stop him. Two seconds later he's just doing it again. He wasn't like this the whole soccer season. It's only been really bad the last few weeks. I'm not sure that I'll sign him up agian, though he does like it. He's not really playing any soccer!
He's not like this all day in school, just during board time, I guess. Or free time or anytime he's supposed to be doing something independently and everyone is milling about the class. And he doesn't do this at recess that I know of.
Chrystee
Hmmmm, sounds like a boy in need of social stories, a positive behavior plan for this time, and some sensory integration.
Just a wild guess, but this is coming during independent time. I am guessing he really doesn't know what he is supposed to do with this independent time. So what he needs is a behavior plan which addresses giving him a personal visual schedule and scheduling it really tight and concrete for him. He could likely use an aide to teach him how to use it and help focus him as well. And positive reinforcement for completing the tasks as well as for keeping his lips to himself, lol.
Then I wonder if he is sensory seeking. Part of the positive behavior plan should be a plan for motor breaks as needed. even for trips to the office carrying something, etc. Or actual sensory activities. For this he would need an aide available as well.
Depending on the level of the severity of the behavior and how much it is interupting he may be able to have some helpful strategies without the aide but you definitely need to ask for an IEP meeting and ask them to write a BSP (behavior support plan)
Renee
I completely agree *and* this is all stuff I brought up at the meeting we had on this past Friday. His teacher said,"he's not going to get an aide in my class; it's not going to happen." and in addition to that, "the principle is adamant that he is going to stay in my class." Huh? I'm not sure what they expect of this kid but he's not going to just spontaneously start acting appropriately!!!
His current teacher doesn't seem willing to use any kind of reinforcement either which is beyond my comprehension. I'm totally fed up with this whole thing. If they think I'm just going to back off and go away because they brush me off, they must be crazy!!!!
I hate that all this is happening during the holidays with all the half days and vacation....etc. We'll be gone for a week too and it throws everything off.
I'll print your post out just as a reminder for me!
Thanks!!!
Chrystee
Oh Oh OH, I just HATE teachers like that! The principal is adament? She obviously has discussed with the principal removing him then. The principal is trying to make her do her job, but that shouldn't be at the expense of your son. If she isn't going to do it perhaps look into putting him in a different mainstream class. Why won't he get an aide in her class? It sounds like she doesn't want it or an extra person in her class.
Ok, here is what I am thinking, though I can't be sure. But this is one of those cases where a teacher doesn't want to be bothered with a SN child in her class. Some of it almost seems like she is making it so it won't be successful for him.
This meeting was with just the teacher? Was it the parent/teacher conference? I would call the principal and ask for a meeting. Write down all your concerns and what the teacher said in the meeting. Make sure to tell the principal you don't want your child to be the one to suffer because the teacher is being stubborn.
My bet would be that if your son did so well last year in a mainstream class and this is the only issue so far in 1st grade, that with the right teacher and supports he will continue to do well in a mainstream class. You just need a supportive teacher.
The principal has ways. They will either make that teacher do her job or they can move him. I have seen both instances. In 3rd grade Cait had monthly IEP meetings as part of a compliance agreement. The teacher didn't want to go because it was a waste of time. The principal and the district rep sat down with her and her contract and said either she goes or she is breaking her contract and will no longer have a job. However, that still didn't make her a great teacher and I should have fought to have Cait moved, but rather pulled her out and homeschooled her the end of the year.
I would really be concerned about that teacher and her attitude. She sounds like one of those that will smile and have that sweet expression but really mean something else.
Renee
About the aide.....it sounded like there just wasn't someone in the building she could have. She is very frustrated because there are 3 other kids in her class on IEPs. I got the feeling that she wanted an aide, but just wouldn't be able to get one without a fight, but perhaps your perception is more accurate!!!
It was an Team meeting that I requested after Sam bit some kids. Neither the principle nor the school psychologist was there. We will have another meeting in Jan. about this. I do get this impression that his teacher doesn't want to do anything extra for Sam. I guess if she doesn't doooo anything he will be unsuccessful and it won't work out and he'll have to be moved anyhow.
About mainstreaming.....I totally agree. Sam still had his times and he will never be the angel or easiest kid to deal with in class, but he is very lovable and funny and really an enjoyable kid to have around. His Kindy teacher appreciated him for what he is; his current teacher does not. Sam did so much better last year than I thought he would.
Parent/teacher conferences were last night and she was running late so we were totally rushed out of the room. I came with a small list of things I wanted to mention (vacation, reminder for me to take pics for morning pic schedule....not a big deal.) Her statement to the student teacher, "oh......she's so organized." Meaning of course, "I hate this woman's guts!" She doesn't realize that if I keep getting the run around, I'll actually start enjoying annoying her! I don't want her to start taking it out on Sam, but I'd like to see him get the help he needs. If that's not in her class, fine.
Thanks for the input!
Chrystee