Adult with Asperger's

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-1999
Adult with Asperger's
Thu, 08-04-2011 - 8:41pm

My adult son (age 22) has Asperger's; we've known about it since he was 15.

First of all, Asperger's wasn't known when he was a baby, nowadays they diagnose the kids young and get them help.

Avatar for Cmmelissa
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2008
Mon, 08-08-2011 - 2:53pm
I'm sorry you are having so much trouble with your son :( Have you thought about going to see a psychologist yourself for help in dealing with him? (((HUGS)))

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-09-2003
Tue, 08-09-2011 - 7:47am

I'm not sure which state you live in, here in NY there are resource people that work our of the county offices that can help cordinate services for disabled adults.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2001
Wed, 09-14-2011 - 12:29am

Sorry to hear things are so bad. I can relate as my son can be so disrespectful and rude at home, it drags down the whole household. I've always told myself if it got unbearable, I would find a really positive boarding school type program for him. I'm sure there must be adult group living type situations for young adults with aspergers. I'm sure your son (if he's anything like mine) would be vehemently opposed to the idea, but you could set down guidelines that would allow him to stay living at home. If he cannot follow them, you could offer to pay for a program that you think will be positive and helpful for him.

I heard a program on NPR recently about a teen with ASD. His parents were at their wits end as he was tantrumming for hours, wouldn't get off the computer, etc etc. They finally, after much deliberation and turmoil, admitted him to a group living situation. To their surprise, HE was much happier there. The group living environment was structured from morning till night with lots of exercise and activities geared towards people with ASD. The whole family was happier with the change.

I'm not saying this is what you should do, or I should do, just putting it out that it has worked for some. One other anecdote I'll share. I run an ASD support group in my community and a mom of a 17 year old recently emailed me. She said her son refused to go to school, get off the couch or do anything at all except constantly be on the computer. She had tried everything, and as a single working mom finally gave up. She said she is just waiting until he is 18, and is ready to just send him on his way. It's heartbreaking that sometimes it comes to this. I hope you and your son can find your way to something more positive.