brand new and panicing ( long sorry)

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2007
brand new and panicing ( long sorry)
6
Thu, 04-03-2008 - 6:23am

hi my name is crystal, yesterday was my youngest dd b-day she turned 5, yesterday we also was told she definitely had ADHD and quite possibly aspergers. my other dd who is 8 1/2 has ADHD so we have our hands pretty full. I've been having a lot of anxiety lately, esp after dd #2 decided not to come home from the bus stop 3 weeks ago and go play instead. I ended up at the urgent care yesterday getting something for anxiety. I am an RN so sometimes knowing so much medically isn't so go. I just need to vent to ppl who might understand and offer advice. I'm trying to pull it together but I guess I'm kinda grieving and worrying how we are gonna do this with 2 high maintenance girls. even though I already have been, knowing seems to make it worse. I just want to make sure they get all the support they can so they can lead productive happy lives as adults.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2003
Fri, 05-02-2008 - 10:06am

Hugs to you!

Tia

"All or nothing, baby!"

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2007
Fri, 04-04-2008 - 3:54am
thanks to all for the support. went to the girls councelor at the school yesterday and talked with him, i'm alot calmer.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2003
Thu, 04-03-2008 - 11:29pm

Crystal,

welcome to the board. We awe glad you found us, but sorry you had to.

it sounds like you have a lot of ood things going for you. First and foremost you know when to ask for help. That is a good thing.

And although your daughters undoubtedly have issues, you are getting them help and addressing these issues. I know the whole diagnosis process is very difficult. However, there are definite advantages to having a diagnosis., You can push for more help and services from the school and the medical community and they can't push it back on you and blame "bad parenting" (which many do).

Also, knowledge is power. Asperger's is not always a bad thing. Learning about it, and how to maximize your DD's strengths, while minimizing her weaknesses will only help all of you.

Please feel free to stick around here and lean on us while you go through this journey. it is a difficult one, I know. But you will be OK. Really. You will.

-Paula


visit my blog at www.onesickmother.com

-Paula

visit my blog at www.onesickmother.com
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 04-03-2008 - 6:34pm

Welcome!!

                                

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-28-2008
Thu, 04-03-2008 - 12:20pm

{{{{{Big Hug}}}}}

I'm sorry you're having such a hard time. It is a bit overwhelming to have two high maitainence kids and it sounds like the AS dx hit you out of the blue. One thing I will say for AS is that often girls don't present as a typical AS. The main thing with ASD kids is that socially they don't get it. Making and keeping friends that are NT is very hard for them.

But an AS dx is not a death sentence. Yes things will be harder and you'll have to learn to roll with the Aspie to get things done. But a lot of famous and successful people have been thought to be possible Aspies. Bill Gates, Temple Grandin, even Albert Einstein.

This board is a wonderful support system. Feel free to post all your questions and concerns here and you'll 'feel the love' of this board.

Welcome

Drea

Andrea, mom to

Graham
Miles
Anson
Avatar for toryanna
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 04-03-2008 - 7:07am

First of all great big {{{HUGS}}} to you. It's not easy with one Aspie, I couldn't imagine with two. Second of all, Victor spent 4 years misdiagnosed and the second we got the correct diagnosis of Asperger's NOT ADHD our life got infinately easier with him. I'm not saying yours will, it's just our experience. I went from fighting him for homework, going to school, taking a bath, etc.. to understanding that because Susie said he was stupid today in math class, that's why he can't do his math homework and if we just let it go 24 hours, he might be able to get it done tomorrow. That's the best advice I could give you. Choose your battles. When one child balks at an idea, ask yourself if this is something you feel strongly about. If it's important, stay on it. If it's not worth fighting, try and let it go. Once I learned to do this, this helped with my anxieties tremendously.


Now that being said, Feel free to vent at these ladies anytime. They are the best group of women. Just pick a spot and dive right in. We don't mind.


Alexis