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|Wed, 07-16-2003 - 1:58pm|
I was pregnant with my 3rd baby and ds started running off in stores. It took me 2 times to realize I was in serous trouble and he had to be in a cart or stroller. But he had to buckled in or he would go to jump out and then would scream like I ws killing him the entire time in the store. The scariest time was when my 3rd baby was 2 months old and we went to have pictures taken. He was three and throwing a fit about it. I walked slightly ahead of him and he took off into the store. I had just gone to the counter to tell a clerk when he ran back up to me. After that I brought him a harness. I used it no matter were we went till he out grew it, of course he acted like it was killing him. I eventully had to stop taking him any were when I did not have another adult with me because I had a 50% chance something would set himoff and he would take off. If we went any were new he flipped out and had a melt down. He would run around like crazy and kick and scream like I was killing him when I held him down. I would have strangers (usully older gentlemen) tell him he needed to behave for mommy. That was always embrassing.
Up till about a year ago he went though fazes. Were he would work up to a melt down over a week or so. He would have one huge melt down then be ok for a month more before starting all over again. But for some reason about this time last year that changed. He started having 2 or 3 melt downs during his bad faze and less time in between. The only place he didnt act up was school (or if we went out to eat but he knew I would leave anywere but drs offices). But he was getting fustrated there with work and shutting down. He would refuse to do it. Sometimes he woud cry other times he would just put his head down. A few times I was called to pick him up over headaches. One had him curled up in a ball in the corner of the room. I knew at this point that something was wrong. But I couldn't get his ped to listen to me (before the headaches). When he was going though a bad spell he would be mean to his sisters. I locked him out of the house one day ( we were renting 5 acres with the house in the middle and I knew he wouldnt run to the road and even if he did it wasnt traveled much) because i couldnt control him and was worried what he would do to his sisters (he was 6 then). His dr kept saying it ws sibling rivary. Family was telling me it was my fault that I wasn't punishing him enough or right. I tried everything and nothing worked. I would send him to his room and after he stopped kicking the walls he would lay in his bed and it looked like he was in his own little world! It didnt faze him any longer at that point and he would get mad when I would disturb him to tell him he could come out. Twice he threatened to break the window thou. He has always been on the dramtic side. Usully using hunger as his excape. he would swear when he was melting down that he was starving to death and his heart was beating fast cuz he was hungry. It wouldn't mattter if he had just eaten he was starving. (He had gone though serval test to check out a heart mumor that was inocent just as he started school and was taught how important the heart was.)
I finally had a break though in March or Early April. I took ds and my oldest for a free karata session. It was then I noticed he was getting over whelmed. At least the reason for that melt down was he was over whelmed. So many new things were thrown at him at once and he couldn't handle it. He ran off from me and out of the building towards a major highway. The next week at school I went for a few hours for field day. They had spent the entire day outside in total caos. His teacher mentioned how well behaved ds had been but some of her others hadn't been. That all changed with my arrival. It was late in the after noon and ds lost it. He was upset that he wasn't standing in line for one of the games and someone took his turn. He took it out on me. First he was just running off. When I ignored that he started trying to push me over and I was holding my youngest (my 4th who is 19 months old now). When that didn't work he started hitting me. I wanted to cry. I couldn't get him under control and no one at the school was helping. I didn't know what to do. My oldest has capd (central auditory processing disorder) and her teacher saw how he was acting and mentioned autism. My first thought was the movie Rain man and I thought no way. But she sent me some info and I thought yeah this sounds like him. From time to time he has complained of noises being to loud that no one else thought was loud.
i was determined that his ped would listen to me and send him out for testing or I would switch peds. I didn't have to. Ds had a melt down waiting to get in to the ped. He had to go potty and thought from there he should go into an exam room. When he couldn't he went outside the door. I ignored him so he ran out by the road (again a busy street) and a nurse saw him and was calling him back (this is what I get for taking my eye off him for a second and not thinking he would go by the road since I wasnt chasing I knew better thou). I held him down but he was screaming to bad and kicking my legs so I let him go. But blocked the door (luckily we were the only ones waiting) so he couldn't get out. He was screaming and rolling around on the ground. I finally asked if it would be possible to put us in a room since that was his problem and they moved us. He stopped instantly. Was like night and day till the dr came in. Some how he got out of the room on the swival rolling chair. I brought him back in but without the chair (that wasn't easy he wieghs 65 pounds and is tall and strong). He wouldn't agree to anything till the chair came in. He was insistant that the chair come in the room. Once the chair was in he calmed down. The ped mentioned autism before I had a chance to. I tought wooo hoo we are getting some were. He is going to see a psycholigist next month to begin testing.
She also gave him a dx of adhd but said they don't do meds till they are sure and he needed testing for that. She was pretty sure about the adhd and the autism thou. She also mentioned bi-polar. I haven't been able to come to terms with the last part and look into it. I will if it comes out he has it but right now I can't. He started acting up again as we left the room and she had heard all about his flight and said we don't normally do this but I am going to put him on something for the adhd. I didnt want to start out with meds but I was worried about him getting hurt or one of his sisters because he let the baby out into the parking lot during his earlier melt down.
He started on Metadate 20 May 3rd and I noticed an instant difference in him. He moved to the sld classroom at school and the teacher noticed a difference too. She had him for a week before he went on the meds thou. She said he wasn't as clingy and would work more. During the summer I have been lax with the med pretty much just giving it to him on days we are going some were. Home can be alittle stressful on days over this and we are going back to daily on Monday. Also want to get him use to it again since school starts eary down here (we are in florida).
The biggest test of the med came on June 22nd. Mil got remarried and ds did very well. A little boy was ringing a bell in his ear and it was bugging him. He asked him nicly to stop and when he didnt ds moved away. HE went and sat as far away as he could and still be were he knew he was allowd to be. He put his head down but was rocking slightly and talking to himself. I rubbed his back and told him how proud I was of him and as soon as the actully wedding took place (It was due any minute) we would sneak outside for some freah air. Beofore the med he would have pushed the boy over and ran off outside (again towards a busy road). He got control of himself and was able to watch the wedding and then we went outside. he was much better outside. We went back in to eat but he didn't want to eat. He did good for another hour or so when he decieded it was time to go home. He kept saying over and over lets go home. He finally sat by the door talking to himself. I had to bribe him to get in a few pictures before we left. I then realized he has never liked having professional pictures taken. Bil was taking pictures and using a professional type of flash (he has his own bussiness). Now I am wondering if the bright light hurts his eyes.
Shortly before this the school's psycholigist (or quack as I refer to her)did her own testing on him to see about getting him help in school. She saw him on a medicated day even thou I was tempted to send him there without it since she ticked me off when I tried explaining ds to her to prepare her for him. She told me she knew her job and had been doing it for 25 years. She kept telling me what a wonderful little boy he was and how smart he was. Well duh I never said he wasn't just that he gets over whelmed and can shut down and refuse to work. I simply wanted her to say hi to him a few times so he knew who she as before she tested him in hopes that would help him. His teacher was even worried about how he would do and went to the quack. He did great thou. She saw no autism and doubts he has any form, she said adha children can have alot of the same signs as autism. She did think he has adhd thou since the med is working. She said it woudn't if he didn't. She thinks his learning problems stem from the adhd and his serve speech problems. She recommands he goes into an LLD (learning laguage defict) program next year were everything revolves around speech or speech is worked into everything. Not sure now which. But it did sound perfect for him. So this means changing schools and hopefully since he had the summer break he will be ok with it but his siter will not be in school with him and I worry that will be hard on him. But she needs self contained sld and his school does not offer that. His iq was 114 verably but she thinks it is actully higher jsut with his speechit is hard for him tog et it all out right but because hubby sees it as being low he doesn't think ds has autism now.
He is currently getting speech and ot at school. His fine motor skills are way behind. The ot therapist isn't sure about autism either but did teach us some things for trying to help him when he gets over whelmed. I am not sure how next year is going to work. Both his current school and the one he should go to have been told the change needs to be before school starts (and the quack actully agrees with me) but I havent heard anything and plan on calling the new school when teachers return August 4th to get things going.
I think I have covered ds. I am not sure what to expect during the testing. I am going to read some of your stories later on. But right now ds is bugging me to get on the computer and my oldest wants to go out in the pool. I will come back later thou I promise.