Hi! New here and need advice :-)(long)

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Hi! New here and need advice :-)(long)
Sat, 06-07-2003 - 10:53am
Hi, I usually hang out on the spirited children forum but some new things have happened with the diagnosis of my 4yr old ds. I'll give you some background first.

I have 3 boys. 13, 11 and 4yrs. My 4yr old always seemed different to me from day one. He wasn't easy to console. Didn't like to be held or rocked and would go on 1hour or more crying fits. He was delayed in talking until 2 1/2 yrs old. Would never look you in the eye. Is very anti social. Doesn't like to make friends and would rather be a loner. He now has some obsessions like, watching a movie with the remote in hand and rewinding each scene and watching it over and over again. He also tries to memmorize the words and actions. He could play video games all day long if we let him. He gets stuck on certain obscessions like that. When we take one thing away he always find something else to obscess about. We have taken the games away and he cannot watch a movie unless he watches it without wanting the remote. We have been working with someone every two weeks since he was 2 yrs old. One year ago he was diagnosed with a sensory disorder.(Hates socks, tags, certain foods, will only wear certain clothes.) There's alot more but I think I'm going on too long as it is.

So now I get to my recent problem and why I'm on this forum. We went to see his developmental pediatrician this week and she is leaning towards Aspergers or that he might be on the low scale of autism. She said it is hard to diagnose him at 4 yrs old. If he still has these traits at 5 or 6 it is probably Aspergers or autism. I have to tell you though that he is in preschool and does great there. He never gives them a problem. He is very unsocial but all and all is a good child at preschool. But when he gets home WATCH OUT!!

I am at the point where I just want a diagnosis so that I know what I am dealing with!! I've read all the books I've gone to countless seminars but I feel until I know exactly what I'm dealing with I can't go forward. I am just numb and tired and exhausted from trying to help him and am getting nowhere. I went on some Aspergers sites and he seems to fit all the criteria. PLEASE GIVE ME YOUR OPINION!

Thanks in advance for your help,


There are 4 things you cannot recover.
1. The Stone.......after the throw.
2. The Word........after it's said.
3. The Occasion......after it's loss.
4. The Time.........after it's gone.
Avatar for maresgood
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 06-07-2003 - 4:24pm
Hi, do whatever you can to get your ds diagnosed! When he gets in to school next year, the district can assess him. The school psychologist will do a battery of tests such as the AS scale. The teacher will also give her input if she feels like something is going on. Until then, the other Mom's have mentioned Early intervention. I'm not sure what that is, or if they have it in Canada. Check with your local Autism Group for help, check with your Children's Hospital, they should be a big help. I didn't get my dd on the road to a diagnosis till 4th gr. I knew from pre-school that she had social issues, but I wasn't sure what was going on. I am an R.N. & I guess I was in denial... She, like your ds had sensory issues, noises, foods, clothes etc. She also has the obsessive type behaviors. It sounds like AS to me. Good Luck in your pursue of getting a diagnosis. MaryAnn
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-15-2003
Sun, 06-15-2003 - 1:43am
Hi Joeysmom! I too would like some answers, so I don't know if I can help you any. But what I can say is that my husband, son and daughter were recently at a friends house for a cook out who happens to have a son that has Aspergers and saw similarities with my son as with theirs. The signs they saw were his temper tantrums when things don't go his way, his obsessiveness with food, only likes certain foods and has to be prepared the same way every time he eats it, won't wear certain types of clothing, if they are too "scratchy", is totally obsessed with "certain" toys, and when the friends who we were with said that their son goes into his own little world, so does ours. I can also share with you that my sister in law deals with Autistic children and believes our son shows signs as well. Actually, he was just diagnosed with ADHD (a suggestion from a teacher in shis school). To tell you the truth, meds that he's on for ADHD don't really seem to be working, so maybe we should head in the direction of Aspergers. Haven't actually had a diagnosis for that yet, but with what info we've been given and what I've researched, I too see similarities. Good luck!