New Here

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-19-2006
New Here
Wed, 05-02-2007 - 3:47pm


I just thought I would introduce myself and my daughter. Elaina is going to be six next month and we are awaiting an official diagnosis, though I feel in my heart that she has Asperger's. My heart is breaking for her. She is very classic textbook Asperger's with a few minor exceptions.

I've read all I can get my hands on about Asperger's and Austim Spectrum Disorders and I am so worried that she will lead a very sad life, full of bullying and teasing. We decided long ago to homeschool her and I'm sure its been the right choice, especially with all of the difficulties she has been experiencing. She belongs to a soccer team which she loves and hates at the same time - she is quite uncoordinated and has so much trouble paying attention to the coach. She would much rather kick the ball as hard as she can, rather than work on strategic kicks. I don't know what to tell the coach because most of the time she appears to be just "difficult" when I know in my heart this is not the case.

She just seems so sad and alone all of the time. She expresses the desire to be with other children, and I am doing my bset to fulfill that - but her experiences with other children have been less than pleasant. Elaina has difficulty understanding personal space and wants to hug and kiss children that are barely acquaintences, and is very domineering of other children - so the kids don't seem to like her much.

Even when she is around other children, she would much prefer to parallel play - with no interaction at all. She spends many hours in the sandbox alone, and she seems perfectly happy at play,

Wife to Nathan
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2003
In reply to: mom2ejandeg
Wed, 05-02-2007 - 11:02pm

Hello and welcome to the board,

Well, it sound like you are dealing with a lot of confusion right now.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-04-2007
In reply to: mom2ejandeg
Wed, 05-02-2007 - 9:57pm
Hi and welcome!
I have only been posting here a short while, but I will tell you this is a very supportive group of women and you'll find a lot of BTDT advice if you hang around.
My heart breaks for you during this time. I think we all went through those same feelings and go through them time and again.
My son who is 8 was recently diagnosed HFA/ppd-nos and as I went through the past year of figuring this stuff out, my first reactions were he's going to be like (rain man... sad boy in corner.... whatever)...... and he's never going to get better.
That is the one thing I have learned over the past year. Just because this is your child's diagnosis, does not mean they aren't going to improve. They may not reach certain things like their classmates, but if you focus on what improvements they are making, it really helps.
I hope the specialists you have working with you on your daughter's diagnosis are able to help you find resources. There is help out there and it can make a BIG difference.
Hang in there and let us know how it's going.